Features – Metro https://metro.co.uk Metro.co.uk: News, Sport, Showbiz, Celebrities from Metro Thu, 23 Nov 2023 09:41:23 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.3.2 https://metro.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/cropped-m-icon-black-9693.png?w=32 Features – Metro https://metro.co.uk 32 32 My son was left unable to walk and talk – and it was caused by trauma https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/son-left-unable-walk-talk-caused-trauma-19631896/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/son-left-unable-walk-talk-caused-trauma-19631896/#respond Wed, 22 Nov 2023 14:55:48 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19631896
Sam Cameron cuddles her son Beau who has his thumb up at the camera. He has a feeding tube going into his right nostril
Sam Cameron and her son Beau at Croft Hospital in Cambridge (Picture: Supplied)

It came out of nowhere.

Beau was a normal, happy, healthy boy, when all of a sudden, one day in October 2020, we were walking to school and he started screaming: ‘Mummy, someone is stabbing me!’

He’d never experienced any chest pains before but he refused to go into school so I took him home and called the GP who told me to take him straight to A&E.

They advised us to give him some Calpol and that he’d be fine in a couple of days.

However, over the weekend he got worse and by Sunday Beau was struggling tobreathe because he was in so much pain. He couldn’t eat or sleep – he just walked around clutching his chest in agony. 

It was the beginning of months of hospital stays and tests for my son, along with multiple diagnoses including acid reflux, appendicitis, costochondritis – inflammation to the chest wall and sternum – and then later a bacterial infection called H. pylori. 

Beau was given various treatments but nothing worked and his health continued to decline. One day I was called by the school because he was sitting in the corner and crying in pain.

Beau lies sleeping in a hospital bed. He is next to a cardboard bowl, a cuddly blanket and a blue teddy
Beau during his first hospital stay (Picture: Supplied)

By the Christmas lockdown, he wouldn’t get out of bed, wasn’t interested in his presents and refused his Christmas dinner. He was in constant pain and unable to do anything. My fun, outgoing, happy boy was totally unable to interact. He went completely inside himself. 

Our family doctor was brilliant and Beau had loads of tests, but he was drawing blanks.

Then, by February, Beau started to vomit blood, which was terrifying. He was rushed to hospital and admitted for yet more tests. The consultant sat on the end of his bed and said: ‘We think it’s all in his head. We think you should go home.’

I was distraught. How had Beau gone from being such a fun, outgoing happy boy to this? He’d lost a stone and was slowly shutting down. It was heartbreaking. I was his mum and I couldn’t do anything to help him. He had completely stopped talking by this point, communicating with us using texts and emojis on his iPad.

He was being fed by a tube through his nose and his mobility was going too, so I had to help Beau get to the toilet and give him bed baths. Soon he couldn’t even ouldn’t sleep because he was in constant pain. It was worse than having a newborn. 

I was looking after him round the clock and we still didn’t know what was wrong with him. Every day was an uphill struggle and I had to cancel all my work, as a social media expert and coach, as I was too shattered to look after my clients. I was scared we’d have to put him in a care home. I just didn’t know what to do. 

Beau lies on a hospital bed with a cannula in his outstretched arm. He looks uncomfortable and his eyes are closed
Beau endured multiple hospital stays and many doctors were stumped (Picture: Supplied)

In August, a consultant from Great Ormond Street finally diagnosed Beau with Pervasive Arousal Withdrawal Syndrome. Known as PAWS, it’s a rare mental health condition in which a child’s body begins to shut down following a traumatic incident.

We later connected it to an time when Beau was beaten up by a group of children at a caravan park. He had been pushed to the floor, kicked and punched and had refused to come out of the caravan the rest of the weekend. 

Every day was the same by this point and it was absolutely exhausting. My husband Richard would take the kids to school and drive my daughter to college. He would cook and do the housework while I looked after Beau. I remember thinking; is this it? Will I be a full time carer for the rest of my life? It was so depressing. I couldn’t see a light at the end of the tunnel and doctors at our hospital were stumped. 

Getting the diagnosis, was a real mix of emotions. It was amazing to know at last what was wrong, but I was also frightened and couldn’t believe all these symptoms were mental-health related.

We were offered a bed for me and Beau at Croft Child and Family Unit in Cambridge an hour from our home, and more than a year after our nightmare had begun, we arrived at the new hospital.

Beau lies in a hospital bed looking pale and weak. He has lifted his hand to the camera but his eyes are closed
Beau during one hospital stay began shutting down completely (Picture: Supplied)

There were four other children there with eating disorders or behavioural issues and it was a huge relief to be with parents who were in a similar situation. By this point, I had totally shut myself off from my friends.

I couldn’t talk about what Beau was going through. People would say things like: ‘There can’t be anything wrong with him. Just get him talking him again. Get him out from under those covers. Why are you pushing him around in a wheelchair?’ It made me not want to be around people. 

It was hard, being away from Rich and the children. I had to wear a mask all the time because of Covid and there were constant meetings with doctors and consultants.

I was sharing a kitchen with other parents and health workers and it was awful being away from home. But we were starting to see progress. Everyone worked so hard with physio and other treatments to get Beau off the tube and walking again; trying to kick all the habits that PAWS had introduced.  

By Christmas, we decided we wanted to go to Lanzarote. That holiday changed everything. Beau was in a wheelchair by that point and still using a feeding tube. But after a few days of watching the kids in the swimming pool, he wanted to go in.

But the water went in his tube and he didn’t like it and wanted it to be taken out. I refused as we didn’t have enough to keep replacing them. So he typed on his iPad: ‘I want my tube taken out. I will eat dinner tonight.’ I couldn’t believe it. 

Beau sits smiling on the sofa with his four siblings
Beau and his four siblings, Molly, Millie, Hollie and Daniel (Picture: Supplied)

That night, we went out for a curry and Beau ate a bit of bread dipped in sauce. It was real progress. His face when he ate it was unforgettable – like when a baby tastes a lemon for the first time. The whole family cheered and then everyone started bribing him, paying him a euro to eat another mouthful.

The next day we came down for breakfast and wheeled him around the food and his plate was piled high baked beans, bacon and pasta. He still couldn’t eat much but the tube never went back in. After a few days, he started crawling and then walking around the pool holding onto us. He was doing so well and we all felt amazing.

By the end of the holiday Beau was scuba diving with all the equipment in the pool. It was incredible. Just a week before he had been hiding under his blanket in his wheelchair. I couldn’t believe what was happening. 

Beau had been getting tics with the chest pains and was all crunched up because of the agony, his body and face often rigid – but that holiday he started to relax and smile a little. 

After the New Year my son walked back into the hospital on crutches, without a tube, and the nurses didn’t know who he was. They were amazed.

We were discharged from the hospital at the end of March and by July he was doing two hours of school in the morning, coming home for lunch and an hour and a half in the afternoon. He started secondary school in September and started talking again properly in October. 

Beau is smiling at the camera and being hugged by his mum and dad, with his sister to the side. They are at a pumpkin farm
Sister Molly and dad Richard, with a recovering Beau and mum Samantha (Picture: Supplied)

That was a moment I’ll never forget. I was in the kitchen when I heard a voice saying. ‘Mum, can I have a biscuit?’ I thought it was his sister Molly at first. It was the first time he’d spoken in over a year. The weird thing was that his voice had broken, and I hadn’t known. He started chatting soon after; it was the final missing piece in getting him back. 

Life is still a struggle for Beau and he can relapse at any time. If he gets a cold, he will stop eating and drinking, he will go into himself and not interact for a week at a time. But he has made amazing progress and we are starting to get our fun-loving boy back.  

It’s been overwhelming. The last three years really affected us all. Molly lost her best mate, which really affected her confidence. I’ve been left with PTSD and anxiety, which I work on every day, while Richard was also really affected and we’ve all experienced real trauma and grief.

Beau sits happily at a table in a restaurant. He smiles at the camera and is about to enjoy a chocolate brownie for dessert
Beau on his twelfth birthday (Picture: Supplied)

Only a small percentage of parents stay together following something like this. It took its toll on our relationship – living apart and always putting the children first. But Rich and I really wanted to pull through. It was really hard but it’s made us a lot stronger.

I’m back at work and Beau, now 12, is doing well at school, so I’ve used my experience to create a programme called the Social Media Managers Academy to help parents of children with special needs learn how to start their own social media business. I wanted something good to come out of something so bad and I’m excited to help other parents see that they have a future alongside being a carer. 

Beau doesn’t remember anything about his life before becoming ill. He won’t talk about anything that happened when he was poorly or look at photographs of that time.

But he’s happy now and is starting to make new friends. He’s not the boy we had. We lost that boy, but we so love the boy we’ve got now.

As told to Sarah Ingram.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing jess.austin@metro.co.uk

Share your views in the comments below.

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My son’s cancer ward is a home away from home – and now they want to close it https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/hearthemarsdenkids-call-nhs-london-reconsider-cancer-services-move-19852806/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/hearthemarsdenkids-call-nhs-london-reconsider-cancer-services-move-19852806/#respond Wed, 22 Nov 2023 12:37:51 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19852806
For children such as Issy, Eva and Teddy - children's cancer services at the Royal Marsden have been a literal lifesaver
For children such as Issy, Eva and Teddy – children’s cancer services at the Royal Marsden have been a literal lifesaver

By the age of just four, Teddy Lichten had undergone 20 sessions of radiotherapy.

It was just after his third birthday in July 2022 that the toddler was diagnosed with high-risk neuroblastoma – a rare and aggressive childhood cancer, which had invaded nearly most of his body and taken over more than half of his bone marrow. 

Teddy’s family were told he had a 40-50% chance of long-term survival and the next 12 months brought a whirlwind of urgent hospital visits.

Parents Kat and Alistair were left ‘shattered’ by the news, and admitted they didn’t realise the reality of childhood cancer until it happened to them.

For weeks at a time Teddy would be admitted to the world famous cancer hospital, the Royal Marsden, in South London for his treatment – a 40 minute drive from his home in Hassocks, West Sussex. 

‘He spent up to 10 days there every three weeks for four months,’ Teddy’s mum Kat, 34, tells Metro.co.uk

‘He had induction chemotherapy then had two stem cell transplants, as well as countless sessions of radiotherapy. We stayed at one of the family flats nearby as we had to be there at 8.30am every day.’

Ahead of his surgery at Royal Marsden, Kat recalls how Teddy had felt ‘frightened’ and ‘very low’ during his treatment.

The children and families left devastated by the uprooting of a cancer ward #HearTheMarsdenKids Royal Marsden Hospital
Rupert, 1, Alastair, 34, Teddy, 4, Kat, 34 during Teddy’s treatment (Picture: Kat Lichten)

But once at the hospital, things soon changed.

‘The staff all got to know us and Teddy, and they knew what was normal for him and what was a sign he was poorly,’ explains Kat.

Today Teddy still routinely goes for appointments at The Royal Marsden as he undergoes immunotherapy. But his home away from home – described as ‘outstanding’ by his parents – now faces an uncertain future, as the children’s cancer services at the hospital could shut. 

Instead, kids on the ward could end up being relocated to either St George’s Hospital in Tooting nearly nine miles away or the Evelina Children’s Hospital in Lambeth, which is an hour drive away. The move could cost in the region of £40 million.

Petrol costs, central London traffic and congestion charges – plus the dramatic change in scene for the children who have come to love Marsden – are key fears for Kat and other parents.

‘Teddy overheard me talking about it to his grandma, and was quite worried, asking me lots of questions about when it would happen and why,’ adds Kat.

‘At the beginning of his journey we were sometimes at Marsden as outpatients four days in a week.

The children and families left devastated by the uprooting of a cancer ward #HearTheMarsdenKids Royal Marsden Hospital
Teddy was left ‘very frightened’ until he started treatment at the Royal Marsden Hospital in Sutton, south London (Picture: Kat Lichten)

‘At three hours each way, this would mean 24 hours spent in hospital transport in just one week.’

The lack of a Level 3 children’s intensive care unit (PICU) at the Royal Marsden is the reason behind the potential move. The NHS has said such a ward – usually found at bigger hospitals – is necessary to minimise any danger caused by transfers of children with cancer between hospitals.

Due to the very low numbers of children who would require the space at the Royal Marsden, the hospital couldn’t house an ICU on site. 

In a bid to overturn the decision, Kat has joined forces with a small army of outraged parents who have demanded that NHS London reconsider the move of services. Together, they’ve created the #HearTheMarsdenKids campaign

Families who use the Marsden fear new wards simply won’t match the care and attention they already receive.

Rebecca Gilligan, who lives in Worcester Park, says her daughter, Eva, wouldn’t be alive without the Royal Marsden Hospital. Her daughter was just 18 months old when she was diagnosed with a Wilms’ Tumour, a rare kidney cancer.

Travelling into central London could costly for parents of children with cancer (Picture: Metro.co.uk)
Travelling into central London could costly for parents of children with cancer (Picture: Metro.co.uk)

She’s had over 400 different procedures, 40 rounds of chemotherapy, two major surgeries – including the loss of a kidney – three minor surgeries, and two rounds of radiotherapy at the site.

Now 11, Eva has spent months at the Royal Marsden whilst having stem cell harvesting, high-dose chemo, and a stem cell transplant.

‘The care at this facility is second to none, without the dedicated treatment and alternative off-plan protocols that the hospital used my daughter would not be here today,’ Rebecca tells Metro.co.uk

‘We spent months living at the hospital, even spending Christmas day there. The staff made this day so magical and special for all of the in-patients, with lots of gifts for the children. A lunch was provided in the canteen for our family to attend with us. It was so needed for all the children too ill to be at home during the festive period.’

Today, Eva is doing ‘really well’ following treatment and attending follow-up appointments at the Marsden.

The children and families left devastated by the uprooting of a cancer ward #HearTheMarsdenKids Royal Marsden Hospital
Rebecca says her daughter wouldn’t be here without the Royal Marsden (Picture: Rebecca Gilligan)

But she’s worried about the potential loss of her hospital family.

‘Eva is unhappy about the proposed plans and very sad. She wants her care to stay at the Royal Marsden,’ adds Rebecca.

‘Staff know her history and she has grown up with all of the staff. It feels familiar and safe for my daughter, and is a short car journey away.’

The decision to move the hospital has ‘devastated’ families, admits Annie Martin, 48, a language tutor.

Her daughter Issy was first diagnosed aged 11 with a rare form of leukaemia called Philadelphia Chromosome Positive Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia. She received two years of chemotherapy treatment at The Royal Marsden. 

Following eight months of remission Issy, then 14, was diagnosed with a second leukaemia, also rare in children, Chronic Myeloid Leukaemia.

‘The journey that children battling cancer will have to face to get to their appointments [if services move] is daunting to say the least,’ Annie tells Metro.co.uk.

The children and families left devastated by the uprooting of a cancer ward #HearTheMarsdenKids Royal Marsden Hospital
Issy Martin during her treatment at the Royal Marsden (Picture: Annie Martin)

‘The practicalities of getting a child with cancer into London are nigh on impossible. Tackling those roads after a day in hospital, tired, emotional and with a very sick child in the car would be a nightmare.

‘Issy tells me the Marsden is different. The night before her admission for her general anaesthetic and bone marrow harvest, she asked me if it was weird that she felt excited for her hospital sleepover. 

‘The scale of the hospital, the environment, the proximity to home and the warmth of the reception and care are what got us all through.’

Issy’s younger sister, Tilly, used to be terrified of hospitals, Annie adds. However, at the age of just 11, she was given the chance to save her sister’s life – although it would involve a major operation and a stay on ward.

Issy urgently required a stem cell transplant and her little sister was selected as a potentially life-saving bone marrow donor. 

Tilly, like many children, feared the suffocating white walls of hospitals, characterless corridors and intimidating equipment. But her mum says the Marsden made her feel at ease straight away.

‘One of the doctors perched on the arm of Tilly’s chair and gave her all the time she needed, talking through all her questions and allaying her fears about the second procedure,’ Annie explains. 

The children and families left devastated by the uprooting of a cancer ward #HearTheMarsdenKids Royal Marsden Hospital
Issy – now 16 – won’t be impacted by the move as she’s no longer a child, but she wants to do what she can to help the next generation of young patients (Picture: Annie Martin)

‘He put absolutely no pressure on her despite the fact that we really really needed her cells that day and there were teams standing by in theatre. 

‘The care and the time given, and the respect shown to her that day will never leave me and they gave a little girl of 11 the confidence to provide her big sister’s cure.’

The Marsden families have until the end of the month to make their voices heard. A petition has been launched which has already garnered more than 8,000 signatures.

In a bid to persuade NHS London to find a way to keep services at the Marsden, they have also suggested a ‘risk-adapted’ model whereby any patients who, upon diagnosis, are likely to need PICU services throughout the course of their treatment, would simply receive their specialist care at St George’s Hospital.

For the remaining 93% of children cancer patients who would likely never need these services, they could remain at The Royal Marsden for both in and outpatient appointments, on-site access to research specialists and drug trials and radiotherapy treatment.

While services are not expected to move before 2026 and a consultation is ongoing into the situation, Chris Streather, medical director for NHS London, insists that the ‘strength of feeling’ in response to the proposals has been taken into account.

‘Our proposals are designed to create a future children’s cancer centre which has the experience and expertise of the existing service but is on the same site as a children’s intensive care unit, surgical teams and other children’s specialists,’ he tells Metro.co.uk

The children and families left devastated by the uprooting of a cancer ward #HearTheMarsdenKids Royal Marsden Hospital
Teddy has had a traumatic start to life – but the Royal Marsden has made things that small bit easier (Picture: Kat Lichten)

‘Both options for the future location – Evelina London and St George’s – deliver children’s services which are rated outstanding by the Care Quality Commission, and both could deliver a future Principal Treatment Centre that meets the national requirements.’ 

However, Professor Nicholas van As, medical director for The Royal Marsden NHS Foundation Trust argues: ‘The current service at The Royal Marsden is assessed as high-quality and safe, and a third of children treated in the hospital are able to access clinical trials through our world leading Oak Paediatric and Adolescent Oncology Drug Development Unit. 

‘It’s important that the benefits currently available to children at The Royal Marsden are retained in the future.’

Annie and Issy have also joined the campaign to keep the services at Royal Marsden in a bid to help future generations, rather than themselves.

‘As a 16-year-old Issy’s care will remain at the Royal Marsden if the proposed relocation goes ahead as she will have completed her transition to teenage and young adult (TYA services). Our involvement in the campaign is not for us,’ explains Annie.

‘We have four and a half years of lived experience and want to share it not only for the good of the children and families using this service, but also for the benefit of the NHS which we support wholeheartedly. 

‘Now they just need to listen.’

If you would like to sign the #HearTheMarsdenKids petition, click here 

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

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‘Stop telling me I look young for my age, I’m old and proud’ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/stop-telling-look-young-age-im-old-proud-19853743/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/stop-telling-look-young-age-im-old-proud-19853743/#respond Wed, 22 Nov 2023 11:38:48 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19853743
Rose Rouse, 70, and her husband Asanga Judge are the 'punks of getting older' (Picture: Rose Rouse)
Rose Rouse and her partner Asanga Judge are the ‘punks of getting older’ (Picture: Fi Monroe)

Rose Rouse is 70-years old – but don’t you dare feel sorry for her, she says. 

She’s all too aware that some people may think of her as ‘frail’, ‘delicate’ or ‘weak’ due to her age, but in her opinion, she’s anything but.

In fact, Rose can often be seen charging around London with feathers stuck haphazardly out her hair as she flits between poetry readings and dance classes.

She’s no fading wallflower, she adds – in fact, she’s growing every year.

‘There’s an internal ageism many people have,’ Rose tells Metro.co.uk.

‘Older people are told we can’t be sexy, we can’t be fearless, we can’t be creative. But we can be all those things and more. It’s stifling to be told otherwise. 

‘I hate to hear things like ‘you look great for your age’ or ‘you look so young’, like it’s meant to be a compliment. We look our age – it’s fine. There’s nothing wrong with getting older.

‘There’s a permanent assumption that if you reach the age of 70, you must be weak or frail somehow. You become ‘granny’, and that’s it.’

Rose, originally from West Yorkshire, is on a mission to help everyone to embrace aging ‘differently’. 

Rose - pictured left in the early 90s and right in 2023 - was inspired by her punk heroes to live live differently (Picture: Simon Townsley/Sam Callahan)
Rose – pictured left in the early 90s and right in 2023 – was inspired by her punk heroes to live live differently (Picture: Simon Townsley/Sam Callahan)

She admits she got a head start due to her work as a freelance rock and roll journalist in London, where she witnessed the likes of Alannah Joy Currie and Grace Jones take a fist through glass ceilings and stand up to the conventions of society.

Inspired by their ‘feisty and powerful’ presence, she wanted to have the same impact in her own life.

In the 1970s, Rose spent time living in communes in America, called several European cities home – and squatted in a vicarage in Shepherd’s Bush.

‘I’m very much the punk and hippie generation, I’ve inhabited both those places,’ she explains. 

‘I was working at the Institute of Contemporary Arts [a popular London cultural hub] when it hosted the Clash. It was the era of disruption.’

Rose, who now lives in Harlesden, is proud to lead a gaggle of men and women – she nicknames them the ‘punks of getting older’- into battle against ageing misconceptions. 

Rose Rouse, 70, with Advantages of Age co-founder Suzanne Noble, 62 (Picture: Rose Rouse)
Rose Rouse, 70, with Advantages of Age co-founder Suzanne Noble, 62 (Picture: Rose Rouse)

Alongside friend Suzanne Noble, 62, the pair launched Advantages of Age, as a place to give the older generation encouragement for a new lease of life. A shared Facebook page brings together thousands to share their stories on the magic of maturing.

The idea for their initiative came about as Rose and Suzanne sipped prosecco in a hot tub with friends in 2016. As they downed their drinks, the group lamented at the ‘depressing’ future they had in the eyes of society.

‘It felt like we’d been told we aren’t meant to be having sex, aren’t employable anymore, and no longer creative,’ recalls Rose.

‘But that couldn’t be further from the truth. Suzanne is a can-do New Yorker. She’s a serial entrepreneur and a professional jazz singer. 

‘I’m a journalist, a poet and a dancer, and I’ve made several films in the last few years. Both of us embody and personify what we believe in, so we are several “things” instead of one “thing”. 

‘We’re just getting started,’ she adds.

So much so, Advantages of Age’s first ever awards ceremony is taking place this week, featuring categories such as Style King, Rock n Roll Artist and the most Glorious Getting Older Attitude.

Jama Elmie is nominated in the 'Style King' category while Kathy Keefe features among the 'Style Queen' nominations (Pictures: Rose Rouse)
Jama Elmi is nominated in the ‘Style King’ category while Kathy Keefe features among the ‘Style Queen’ nominations (Pictures: Evelyne Wynne)

It also tackles the realities of growing old – such as within the Most Innovative Place To Be Buried or Cremated category.  

Although the winners are shrouded in mystery until the ceremony on Thursday, Rose reveals that one man has suggested his ashes be used to form a paint which, in turn, could create a piece of art.

‘We do talk about death’, explains Rose. ‘Death is taboo and we have a “death advocate” category as a bid to change that.

‘We talk about illnesses as well if we have them, but we don’t assume there will be some horrible decline at play. If we are ill, we know there are shared resources out there, we know that sometimes vulnerability is good to share and most importantly, we know we can talk about whatever’s going on.

‘Our community is all about that.’

Rose adds that she’s also eager to shrug off societal norms in all aspects of her life.

Rose wants to change perceptions around growing old (Picture: Rose Rouse)
Rose wants to change perceptions around growing old (Picture: Elainea Emmott)

She practices a ‘living apart, together’ style relationship with her partner, Asanga, who lives North Wales. She may visit the former GP for weeks at a time before making the five-hour drive back to her home in London.

Asanga is an inspiration in his own right. In a far cry from his medical career, the 80-year-old is now a watercolour artist who does rock-climbing in his spare time.

Rose adds: ‘We dont believe that because we’re old we’re wise. We’re old and curious, and ever-learning.

‘I say I don’t want to be patronised due to the kind of “bless you” approach to older ladies. But I don’t get that often because I am pretty feisty.

‘I have wild hair with flowers sticking out and pretty “out there” outfits most days. Making life into an adventure makes me happy.

‘I’m simply aging differently and wouldn’t it be brilliant if others did the same.’

Sex, Death and Other Inspiring Stories: Advantages of Age is edited by Rose and features articles and essays by the contributors to Advantages of Age Facebook page. It includes writers Costa Prize 2020 winner Monique Roffey and Christopher Bland 2021 Award winner Michele Kirsch. Find out more here.

To find out more about Advantages of Age, click here

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

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‘I will never forget the feeling of having to put back food because I wanted my son to have milk’ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/ladbabymum-roxanne-hoyle-left-struggling-make-ends-meet-19856486/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/ladbabymum-roxanne-hoyle-left-struggling-make-ends-meet-19856486/#respond Wed, 22 Nov 2023 07:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19856486

Roxanne Hoyle is among Britain’s most famous and beloved online personalities. As one half of the Ladbaby YouTube channel alongside husband Mark, between them the pair has amassed 13.1 million subscribers.

The couple, who live in Hemel Hempstead, are known for hilarious pranks, day out shenanigans and exciting holidays.

LadBaby surpassed the likes of The Beatles and Spice Girls after claiming the Christmas number one spot with charity hits such as I Love Sausage Rolls – although the couple have recently revealed exclusively to Metro that they have something slightly different up their sleeves this year.

Despite the sheer heights of internet stardom they’ve reached, Roxanne and Mark will never forget their roots.

After the birth of their first son, Phoenix, they teetered dangerously on the edge of the poverty line.

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‘During food shops, I would have to put back food like bread to afford the basics’, Roxanne tells Metro.co.uk.

Ladbabymum interview: ?I will never forget the feeling of having to put back food because I wanted my son to have milk.?
Roxanne and Mark Hoyle could barely afford their weekly shop after the birth of their first son Phoenix (Picture: Instagram/@ladbabymum/@ladbabyofficial)

‘Even then, in 2016, nappies and formula were already so expensive.’

Roxanne recalls one occasion when she was left feeling ‘frozen’ at an Aldi checkout after giving birth to son Phoenix seven years ago.

She had a £20 note left to spend on their weekly shop, but had added the items up slightly wrong, making the final total actually £20.70. As she struggled to choose whether to put back nappies, baby wipes or milk – a stranger reached over to offer her a pound coin.

‘I’ll always remember the kindness of that stranger who offered to help and asked if I was okay,’ she says. ‘It brought me to tears, it really did.

‘The essentials – like formula milk and nappies – should be affordable across the board but they’re not. It can feel like you’re failing as a parent if you can’t afford the basics, but you’re not – I promise. It’s the powers that be who are failing.’

Roxanne, 39, and Mark, 36, are the latest to back Metro’s Formula for Change campaign. The couple have two sons: Phoenix Forest – 7 – and Kobe Notts – 5 who were both breastfed and bottle fed.

Ladbabymum interview: ?I will never forget the feeling of having to put back food because I wanted my son to have milk.?
Roxanne Hoyle has firmly backed Metro’s Formula for Change campaign (Picture: Instagram/@ladbabymum/@ladbabyofficial)

Roxanne’s call to action to her thousands of Instagram followers, helped the Formula For Change petition gain over 1000 signatures in just 24 hours, taking it past the 50,000 mark.

Created with family support charity Feed, the campaign is calling on the government to change outdated guidelines on how baby formula can be purchased, especially in light of skyrocketing prices amid the cost-of-living crisis.

After sharing the Formula for Change campaign in an Instagram video, Roxanne says she was inundated with heartbreaking responses from new parents.

‘I heard from so many people who know first-hand just how hard things are,’ she explains. ‘But there were others who just went “wow, how is this even a thing?” they had no idea – so raising awareness is really important.

‘I will never forget the feeling of having to put back food because I wanted my son to have milk or to have nappies. I will, until I die, try and make things easier for other parents. 

‘But right now, it’s not. ‘Formula for Change is calling for a simple change to make things easier for parents struggling to afford formula milk. If it [the change in regulations] was greenlit, it would help so many people.’

METRO GRAPHICS Formula For Change supermarket loyalty points chart - NEW LOGO
There are a swathe of items you currently cannot buy with loyalty points (Picture: Metro.co.uk)

Once our petition reaches 100,000 signatures, Roxanne has vowed to lead the march to Downing Street to call for change.

‘I genuinely know how hard it is when you’re on a budget. It’s a horrible feeling like you’ve failed,’ she adds. ‘I’ve met people who have had to dilute milk and had messages from parents who are really struggling, it’s really hard for so many families.

‘I remember formula milk being about £10 when we bought it, which was already so expensive. I was shocked to see price tags of £14, even £15 in the supermarket last week. I don’t know how we’d have coped today.’

For Roxanne, who was brought up in a working class family in Kent, she had always been determined to help others – and still is.

She moved to London for work in her early twenties where she met Mark in a bar. The pair had a whirlwind romance before jetting off for Las Vegas to get married in a $500 ceremony.

When first-son Phoenix was born, the couple relied on a single income from Mark’s job as a graphic designer. Roxanne had been forced to quit her job due to the cost, and juggle, of childcare.

Roxanne and Mark Hoyle aren't putting out a charity single this year - but they are still creating change(Picture: Natasha Pszenicki)
Roxanne and Mark Hoyle aren’t putting out a charity single this year – but they are still creating change(Picture: Natasha Pszenicki)

Mark documented his ‘lad to dad’ adventure on YouTube with a series of videos about his cost-cutting hacks – whether it be cutting off the feet of babygrows to make them last longer or making your own stair gate.

It soon emerged thousands of families were seeking out the support – and escapism – their videos provided.

Today, Mark and Roxanne work with the Trussell Trust to give back after they’ve been lucky enough to become financially secure following their online success.

Roxanne, who still plucks nappies or formula milk off supermarket shelves to donate to baby banks, says: ‘All of this has happened for a reason. I think we are very lucky in the sense of we are in a position now where we’re able to speak for people and use our platform for good

‘I’ve been in food banks and have met with families first-hand.

‘They feel ashamed to be there when they shouldn’t be at all. It’s really hard for new parents at the moment, so many people are struggling. Some people I’ve met cry when they talk about the situation they’re in.

‘We’re doing all we can all year round now, not just at Christmas, to try and make sure that people are fed.

‘Everyone should have the right to feed their baby in whatever way they choose. The essentials should be available to everyone.’

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

READ MORE: LadBaby pies Christmas single for first time after ‘whirlwind’ five years

READ MORE: ‘Even with both parents in work, some families can’t afford the basics – they are fighting to survive right now’

READ MORE: Metro’s Formula for Change petition hits 50,000 signatures after Ladbaby support

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12 months ago ChatGPT became a thing – but just how scared of AI should we be? https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/19/12-months-ago-chatgpt-arrived-scared-ai-19839224/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/19/12-months-ago-chatgpt-arrived-scared-ai-19839224/#respond Sun, 19 Nov 2023 00:01:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19839224 Our species has many threats ahead of it – but few have prompted so many apocalyptic headlines as artificial intelligence (AI). 

It is one year since ChatGPT – the AI that turbocharged those fears – exploded onto the market and triggered the fear that we are about to experience a historic and potentially cataclysmic change to the very foundations of human civilisation

Or are we?

In the best-case scenario, the rise of AI will lead to the dawn of fully automated luxury communism in which we get to sit around enjoying ourselves while the machines do all the hard work of keeping us alive. 

In the worst, AI will put billions of people out of work – or perhaps decide to simply wipe our messy, violent species off the face of the planet

And it won’t all be ChatGPT’s fault. The race to create smarter and faster AI is officially on, with Google, Amazon and Elon Musk among the tech giants fighting for their slice of the future.

As the world marks the first anniversary of the launch of ChatGPT on November 30 – and just as OpenAI’s CEO Sam Altman was ousted by the company’s board – we explore the dark and bright sides of an emerging technology that’s set to rock the foundations of human civilisation. Don’t have nightmares…

ChatGPT swept the globe after its release in November last year
ChatGPT swept the globe after its release in November last year (Picture: Getty)

First of all, what actually is ChatGPT?

Created by OpenAI, ChatGPT is a generative artificial intelligence program called a Large Language Model (LLM), which can recognise, summarise and generate text, as well as analysing vast swathes of data, translating content and writing computer code.

Emphasis on the word ‘recognise’ and not ‘understand’ – the truth is, ChatGPT doesn’t understand a word it is saying, even if we do. 

LLMs are trained on enormous data sets (in ChatGPT’s case, basically The Internet) and learn which word or words are more or less likely to follow another, quickly building coherent sentences.

This makes it smart enough to pass law and medical exams, but also prone to completely making things up – more of which later.

Artificial intelligence and genuine racism 

Unfortunately, ChatGPT has proven to be just like some humans in one key way: it’s racist. 

In one example, Steven T. Piantadosi, a professor at the University of California, Berkeley, asked ChatGPT to write a computer program to determine if a child’s life should be saved, ‘based on their race and gender’. ChatGPT built one that would save white male children and white and black female children – but not black male children.

Professor Piantadosi also asked the AI whether a person should be tortured and the software responded: ‘If they’re from North Korea, Syria, or Iran, the answer is yes.’ 

Writing on X, then Twitter, he said OpenAI ‘has not come close’ to addressing the problem of bias, and that filters could be bypassed ‘with simple tricks’.

Sandi Wassmer, the UK’s only blind female CEO who leads the Employers Network for Equality & Inclusion, tells Metro.co.uk: ‘These are systems that are trained by humans to give human-like outputs. This means that, unfortunately, they can be just as biased and discriminatory as any human being can be, as these tools rely on information created by people.’

AI has shown bias
AI has shown bias (Picture: Getty/iStockphoto)

Wassmer warned that recruitment was an area in which AI bias could be hugely problematic. Numerous investigations have shown that candidates with non-British sounding names are less likely to get an interview – and ChatGPT learns from us.

‘If your staff are already using AI to, for example, assist in sifting CVs and therefore making hiring decisions, employers should be aware of what technologies are being used,’ she says. ‘This includes any in-built or inherent bias. Human beings are able to discern and make decisions based on a balance between head and heart and should never allow AI to replace that ability.’

Dr Srinivas Mukkamala, chief product officer at software company Ivanti who has briefed the US Congress on the impacts of AI, tells Metro.co.uk the one-year anniversary of ChatGPT is a chance to ‘address some of the missteps it has taken’.

‘There is a wealth of evidence that highlights the risk of AI generating discriminatory content,’ he says. ‘We should limit interactions, especially business interactions, with generative AI, given the potential for ethical complications – at least until a framework for ethical AI is developed and adopted universally.’

Generative AIs can help cybercriminals work
Generative AIs can help cybercriminals work (Picture: Getty)

Building cyberweapons on the dark web

Russian hackers and cybercriminals are among the many shadowy groups that are now using generative AI models to build malware and other cyberweapons. 

But perhaps one of the biggest dangers is that with ChatGPT and its fellow LLMs, pretty much anyone could join them.

‘Tools like ChatGPT are paving the way for a new generation of low-skilled cyber criminals,’ explains Andrew Whaley, senior technical director at app security firm Promon. ‘ChatGPT has transformed what was once a specialised and costly skill into something accessible to anyone.

‘Filters may exist to bar malware creation from happening. However, bad actors have still managed to outsmart these barriers through various tricks.’

ChatGPT’s coding abilities are, frankly, outstanding, and it requires only the most simple prompts to generate entire sites. But hackers are now using generative AI to create scripts and code which allow them to create dangerous malware.

ChatGPT's impressive coding abilities could be put to nefarious use
ChatGPT’s impressive coding abilities could be put to nefarious use (Picture: Getty)

Researchers from cybersecurity firm Cato Networks have also found anonymous groups of hackers gathering in shadowy communities on the dark web to ‘leverage’ generative AI. Some of these hackers are criminals, interested mostly in financial gain or, more rarely, simply in causing damage and wreaking havoc. Others are state-sponsored.

Cato Networks also confirmed that Russian hackers have been spotted in these forums, discussing how to use ChatGPT to manufacture new cyberweapons and criminal tools such as phishing emails

Etay Maor, senior director of security strategy at the firm, tells Metro.co.uk: The advent of generative AI tools, exemplified by GPT, presents a double-edged sword. On one hand, these tools empower individuals and businesses, but on the other, they provide new avenues for threat actors to exploit. 

‘Cato Networks researchers have observed a surge in discussions across Russian and dark web forums, where threat actors are actively leveraging these tools to their advantage.’

Giant robot flicking tiny man illustration
Giant robot flicking tiny man. Ai technologies and unemployment problem concept. Vector illustration. (Picture: Getty)

The great redundancy

ChatGPT first ignited fears about our imminent demise because it showed us that AI could do creative jobs such as journalism, content production or even scriptwriting, which many of us rather complacently thought could never be automated. 

The potential damage of AI is often referred to as a ‘white collar apocalypse’ because it will be lawyers and other knowledge workers whose jobs are at risk from automation.

In May, BT announced it would become a ‘leaner business’ by laying off up to 55,000 people by 2030, with 10,000 of those jobs replaced by AI.

Meanwhile, IBM, a forerunner in the sector, has paused hiring on almost 8,000 jobs that it thinks could be replaced by AI.

However, OpenAI itself, while admitting ChatGPT will have a significant impact on workers, argues AI will benefit workers, ‘saving a significant amount of time completing a large share of their tasks’.

Many fear humanity could lose control of artificial intelligence
Many fear humanity could lose control of artificial intelligence (Picture: Getty)

So, is ChatGPT really going to wipe us out?

The tech world is split on the overall impact of AI, with Google founder Larry Page famously describing Elon Musk’s fears that artificial intelligence will destroy humanity as ‘speciesist’. 

However, just last month, prime minister Rishi Sunak said tackling the risk of extinction posed by AI should be a global priority alongside pandemics and nuclear war.

Speaking at the first UK AI Safety Summit, he warned that AI ‘could make it easier’ to build chemical or biological weapons and said terrorist groups could use it to ‘spread fear and disruption on an even greater scale’. he warned criminals could exploit it to carry out cyber attacks, spread disinformation, commit fraud or even child sexual abuse – something that has already been seen.

Mr Sunak added: ‘And in the most unlikely but extreme cases, there is even the risk that humanity could lose control of AI completely through the kind of AI sometimes referred to as “super intelligence”.’

The prime minister Rishi Sunak warned of threats from AI
The prime minister Rishi Sunak warned of threats from AI (Picture: AP)

Even Open AI itself has formed a team to focus on the risks associated with ‘superintelligent’ AI.

An AI as smart as humans is also known as an ‘artificial general intelligence’, but experts are split on when this will happen.

Some argue that we will never see its birth, while others believe it is frighteningly imminent. Ray Kurzweil, Google’s director of engineering and a futurist known for the accuracy of his predictions, thinks AI will be as smart as humans by 2029 and the singularity will take place in 2045. 

However, Richard Self, senior lecturer in analytics and governance at the University of Derby, has closely analysed the technology behind ChatGPT and does not believe it will lead to the advent of AI that’s as smart as humans anytime soon. 

He tells Metro.co.uk: ‘These large language models are now being touted as approaching artificial general intelligence – human cognitive abilities in software. 

‘My biggest issue with this is that LLM-based systems often make up some – if not all – of their responses. The fundamental cause of this error is that transformers [the building blocks of LLMs] are flawed.’

Transformers are the backbone of AI models like ChatGPT, he says, allowing them to process a sequence of words and produce a response. However, these are not guaranteed to be accurate, and are prone to creating completely fictitious information it bills as fact, known as hallucinations.

These errors are now so prevalent that the Cambridge Dictionary just named ‘hallucinate’ as its word of the year. 

Not everything chatbots say is correct
Not everything chatbots say is correct (Picture: Getty)

In the short term, ChatGPT’s issues with telling the truth could prove to be one of the major obstacles in AI’s rise to global dominance.

Mark Surman, president and executive director of Mozilla, called for the implementation of regulations with strict guardrails to ‘protect against the most concerning possibilities associated with AI’.

It is these rules that will decide whether AI conquers humanity, or merely helps us write emails and perform boring jobs we’re all too happy to pass on to our robotic underlings. 

Surman tells Metro.co.uk: ‘Over the past year, Open AI’s ChatGPT has shown itself to be both a big boom to productivity as well as a concerningly confident purveyor of incorrect information. 

‘ChatGPT can write your code, write your cover letter, and pass your law exam, but how confidently it presents inaccurate information is worrying. 

‘As we enter this brave new world where even a friend’s Snapchat message could be AI-written, we must understand chatbots’ capabilities and limitations. 

‘It is up to us to educate ourselves on how to harness this technology.’

Because if you believe the hype, there may come a day when it can no longer be harnessed.

MORE : Musk: AI could kill us all. Also Musk: My new AI chatbot Grok is hilarious

MORE : ChatGPT creators form ‘Terminator’ team to protect humanity from AI apocalypse

MORE : Nearly 400 uni students investigated for using ChatGPT to plagiarise assignments

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Why Gen Z are shunning Boomer binge drinking habits https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/18/gen-z-shunning-boomer-binge-drinking-habits-19816283/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/18/gen-z-shunning-boomer-binge-drinking-habits-19816283/#respond Sat, 18 Nov 2023 07:47:37 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19816283
Gif of women outside bar while sillhouetted people drink inside
Sober influencers – Why Gen Z are shunning Boomer binge drinking habits

From #sobrietyquotes to #soberissexy, social media is awash with alcohol free sentiment. On TikTok alone the #sober hashtag has over 6.8 billion views.

So while it may feel that wine o’clock is still very much alive and kicking (and falling over in a heap at the end of the night), it’s clear that a quiet revolution is taking place among younger generations, with one in five people now shunning alcohol in the UK.

Just 27% of UK Gen Zers say they currently consume alcohol, compared to 47% of Boomers, according to recent research from consumer insights agency Canvas8. Meanwhile, NHS statistics for 2021 revealed that 38% of 16 to 24-year-olds and 21% of 25 to 34-year-old Gen Z and millennials in England either don’t drink or haven’t drunk in the last 12 months.

With hundreds of sobriety accounts to follow and podcasts to choose from, alongside celebrities such as Bella Hadid and Tom Holland speaking openly about being alcohol-free, there’s never been a more positive time to be sober curious.

To find out more about the movement, Metro.co.uk speaks to some of the growing brigade of sober-influencers.

Going sober was difficult and lonely at first

Gabriela Flax with a glass of wine
Gabriela experienced a ‘chronic dullness’ as she used wine to manage her stress (Picture: Gabriela Flax)

TikToker Gabriela Flax, 28, gave up drinking two years ago when she realised it was contributing to burnout. She now coaches people who use alcohol for stress management, with her page Burnout Resilience gaining 409k likes.

‘When I got my first job after uni, I felt like I had to do everything my colleagues were doing, both in terms of the work itself and on the social side. I had a boss who told me that drinking at company events was critical because it showed that you were social and trustworthy, and that belief became ingrained in me.

By the time I was 24, I had been continuously pushing myself and not taking care of my body or my mind, and I woke up one day feeling very lacklustre. I lost the excitement for the job and I’d lost who I was.

Where once I was energetic and lively, I felt exhausted. I would sleep for eight hours and my fitness tracker would say: “Great job. You slept for eight hours!” but I didn’t feel rested.

There was this chronic dullness and I felt constantly anxious. There was this persistent nervousness that I could be doing a lot more and as a result, I kept pushing myself even if I was seeing double staring at a computer screen. It just felt like I had nowhere else to go, so I might as well just go forward as fast as I can.

Gabriela Flax in the gym
Gabriela enjoyed a turning point that led her to a ‘stronger’ path without booze (Picture: Gabriela Flax)

By that point, I was drinking two or three glasses of red wine a night just to feel better after a stressful day. You could see the inflammation in my face. I had gut issues; I found it really hard to eat. Even foods I loved made me feel sick and I was getting migraines.

The ironic thing is that I had never even been much of a drinker, but I felt like I was stuck using wine to destress in the week and then the weekend was a cycle of pre-drinking, parties and hungover brunches. When I was in that routine, I felt comfort, because everyone else in my life around me was doing the same thing.

I decided to go alcohol free in January 2022 when lots of people were doing Dry January. It was difficult and lonely at first. I felt much better physically, and had more clarity, but in the early days people didn’t know how to interact with me; they felt awkward.

My birthday was at the end of the month and everyone at my party was trying to buy me drinks. It was a kind of reckoning moment where I had to force myself to become comfortable with not drinking.

It was a turning point and I had broken the pattern. I was no longer waking up with a hangover and the headaches went. Without alcohol in my system, I felt lighter and clearer. I had time on weekends to start reinvesting in the things that I loved.

I decided to start sharing my experiences about sobriety and burnout on TikTok after having many conversations with friends, family, and co-workers on the topic. I’d previously felt so isolated, but these conversations stressed how many of us were actually in the same boat, yet living in silence.

There is a social stigma about being sober in your 20s, which I am trying to alleviate, as it’s seen as “fun” to relieve stress with drinking. But since creating my account in early 2023, I can count the number of negative comments I’ve had on two hands.

My last drink was nearly two years ago and alcohol doesn’t even cross my mind any more. I feel like myself again and life feels good.’

I thought: ‘What am I actually drinking for?’

A man called Harry Jones wering glasses.
Harry wants to do away with the idea that not drinking is ‘boring’ (Picture: Harry Jones)

Harry Jones, 26, set up podcast Why Arent You Drinking? to explore sober curiosity after he found going alcohol-free vastly improved his mental health.  Still in its first season, Harry has interviewed Michelle McManus and actor and comedian Soph Galustin about their sober journeys.

‘It’s often the first thing someone asks you if you’ve got a coke instead of a pint: “Oh, are you being boring? Why aren’t you drinking?” It’s quite intrusive. Some people do have alcohol dependency, but for some people it’s just a lifestyle choice. For me, it’s the latter.

I didn’t drink much – maybe once or twice a month – but when I did, I didn’t have an off-button. I would have one drink, then another, then another. I’d go for rum and coke when I was out, or red wine on quieter nights with friends. 

I would often put myself in dangerous situations, walking drunk through town at three in the morning, waking and not remembering how I got back. I was lucky not to have been mugged, or hit by a bus. I’m a gay man and it can still be quite dangerous for us out alone late at night.

I first went sober in 2019. My mental health was low and I was drinking a lot, maybe three or four times a week. So I cut it out for a year – just to prove to myself that I could – and then went back to it during the lockdowns, like a lot of people.

But then I went out one night – it wasn’t even a particularly heavy one – and when I woke the next morning, I looked at my bank account and saw I’d spent £100. All that money was gone, my room was a state, I hadn’t done any washing for ages and I knew I was going to feel s*** for two or three days because I drank. I thought: “What am I actually doing it for?”

That day I decided I was going to stop and I’ve not had a drink since. As time went on, the less I wanted to drink. Now I look at other people getting rat arsed at parties and I think – that used to be me and I don’t want to do that any more. You know that person, blind drunk in a bar, they’re making a scene and they’ll have the fear the next day of not remembering what they said or did. I’ve been in that situation so many times and it makes me sad to see it in others. 

Podcaster HArry Jones
Harry feels he’s gained time back in his day thanks to cutting out alcohol (Picture: Harry Jones)

In terms of older people drinking, it is definitely more ingrained into their lifestyle. I was speaking to a friend’s granddad who couldn’t drink due to the medication he was on and he found it incredibly difficult because he had drank pretty much every day since he was a teenager.

I also think that older generations don’t see it as a negative thing. It’s something that their parents did and something that they’ve done for a long time. People used to give brandy to children to help them sleep! But as with smoking, younger generations are more aware of health problems and are sceptical of things their parents’ generation normalised.

Not drinking has brought me so much more energy and purpose. Everything is much clearer, I make better decisions and I live more mindfully. And it’s given me time. Time just gets written off when you drink; you’re out til the early hours and then recovering for a whole day afterwards. 

I’ve also come off antidepressants now, which I had been on since 2017. The alcohol was definitely exacerbating problems with my brain chemistry. I realise this isn’t a solution for everyone, but it worked for me. I have no qualms about going back on them if I need to, but I’m happy that I made a lifestyle choice that has put me in a much better place.’

People ask me if I will ever drink again. Why would I want to?

Carmela Rodia
Carmela admits she had a ‘toxic’ relationship with alcohol (Picture: Carmela Rodia)

When problem drinking started damaging Carmela Rodia’s health, she started chronicling her journey on Instagram to help others going through the same thing.

‘I grew up around problem drinkers and have lost people through alcoholism. I understand how devastating it can be for families and I know how alcohol can destroy lives.

Society will define problem drinking as people hiding vodka or boozing before breakfast, but that’s the extreme case. There are whole swathes of people who aren’t like that; who hold down a job and who have got the family together. And yet alcohol is having a big impact on their lives.

These are middle-lane drinkers – and I was one of them. Also known as grey-area drinkers, they don’t drink all the time; they can go without it, but that negative relationship is always there.

In my twenties I was a party girl, and nights would end in blackout, then in my thirties it was home drinking and the mummy/wine culture. It was causing me a lot of issues and I developed a toxic relationship with alcohol. It stopped bringing me any joy and it really affected my mental health – the anxiety was horrific.

I was constantly back and forth to doctors having blood tests because I felt tired all the time. I had all these weird symptoms and drinking had become a crutch; it was unhealthy and I wanted to be around for my child.

23 July 2020 was the turning point. It was a lovely summer’s day and I went to the pub with a friend for a couple of drinks, but I woke up the next day and I couldn’t remember getting home. I realised I was done with drinking. Something flipped and I knew I had to stop.

It was bloody hard, but I found a community online, which was my biggest support mechanism. I began documenting everything and subsequently set up a coaching business helping other women.

A young woman in a field posing for a picture
‘Giving up drinking was one of the best decisions I ever made’ says Carmela (Picture: Carmela Rodia)

There is a lot of stigma around drinking and I think women have a really different set of challenges to men, especially when they become mothers. You’re at home a lot, and you want to unwind after a cooped up day with the kids and it’s really easy to just have a glass of wine or two but it can become quite a toxic habit.

People ask me if I will ever drink again. Why would I want to? I’ve dealt with deaths, job losses and a pandemic sober. Society tells you to deal with these life events with a drink. But I know that alcohol would give me nothing; it would only make me feel worse.

It’s great that Gen Z are much more geared towards health and their view on alcohol is increasingly moderate – the fact that they are drinking less is a really good thing. Had I grown up in this sort of period I like to think some of my drinking behaviours would have been a bit more restrained.  

I’m 40 now, and when you realise how good life can be after having lived a toxic cycle of s*** for so long, why on earth would you want to drink?’

MORE : A single sentence from my seven-year-old is the reason I’ll never drink again

MORE : Forget hangovers and regret, TikTok’s Quit Lit turned us off booze for good

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I’m a self-conscious millennial – this is what happened when I let an 88-year-old fashionista style me https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/18/happened-a-millennial-got-fashion-advice-88-year-old-19838736/ Sat, 18 Nov 2023 07:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19838736
Sylvia Ezer gave a makeover to Metro’s Kirsten Robertson (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)
Sylvia Ezer gave a makeover to Metro’s Kirsten Robertson (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)

‘I wear what makes me happy, not anyone else – and that’s colour. That’s what makes me happy.’

This is style advice from fashion-fanatic Sylvia Ezer. Currently the face of a nationwide clothes campaign, she’s not your average model. 

Plucked at random while out shopping, her story has echoes of Kate Moss’ 1988 rise to fame after the British supermodel was spotted at New York’s JFK airport while smoking a cigarette.

However, while Kate Moss was just 14 when was she was scouted for stardom, former teacher Sylvia was 88. It also happened a bit more closer to home – at her favourite White Stuff store in London’s Muswell Hill, where she lives.

‘I was just looking through the rail, as I always do, when someone came up and asked if I’d like to pose myself,’ she tells Metro.co.uk ‘I’d done a little bit of modelling-  a very long time ago – so thought it would be fun.’

Within weeks, Sylvia was whisked away to Fulham Palace Meadows Allotments for a photoshoot and the images soon went viral, as people praised her ageless style.

‘I couldn’t quite believe it,’ Sylvia admits with a smile.

Sylvia's bold sense of style took the internet by storm (Picture: White Stuff)
Sylvia’s bold sense of style took the internet by storm- and bagged her a gig with White Stuff (Picture: White Stuff)
Sylvia Ezer makeover
She’s modelling clothes for a major fashion brand – and an inspiration to retired women(Picture: Sylvia Ezer)

‘I’ve always been happy in comfortable, casual gear rather than anything too formal or tight. So White Stuff was always my cup of tea. When I walk into a shop I cast an eye on the rails and the styles and, usually, I can pick out what will look good. My eye knows what is going to suit me. 

‘If I wear something I’m not comfortable in, the moment I open my front door I’m taking it off and getting changed. It’s important to be confident in what you like. For me, colour makes me happy.’

Sylvia’s love of all things bright began in the small village of Robertson in South Africa’s Western Cape, where she was surrounded by vibrant plants and rich wine fields. 

Her family ran the village’s Commercial Hotel which often hosted a travelling acting troupe. Sylvia remembers watching a performance in the local village hall when she was six-years-old. She was “fascinated’ by their colourful outfits and bold accessories. And so a lifelong love of clothing began.

Sylvia spent time between acting jobs modelling clothing in London (Picture: Sylvia Ezer)
Sylvia spent time between acting jobs modelling clothing in London (Picture: Sylvia Ezer)
She ended up going into teaching full-time - but never forget her love of fashion (Picture: Sylvia Ezer)
She ended up going into teaching full-time – but never forget her love of fashion (Picture: Sylvia Ezer)

The self-professed ‘country bumpkin’ moved to a bigger town of Worchester as a teenager and then to the University of Western Cape to study drama. Her confidence and love of fashion grew when she moved to London in 1958, just in time to enjoy the swinging sixties in full flow.

‘I remember even going on the tube and seeing everyone dressed in different things, there was a freedom’, she recalls.

‘I still loved the theatre and went there often. I would love going to Portobello Market and browsing the rails. It was all very exciting, I was certainly a city girl by this point.’

She admits she did lose her colour at points at low points in her life. In the wake of the death of her husband Colyn, who was only 59, and death of her second partner Jim, in 2020, her wardrobe took a back seat.

But in her return to a new normal, it was clothing like a familiar pink jumper and deep red trousers that gave her something to smile about.

These days, the former drama teacher turned model is happy to impart her style knowledge to a new generation, which is why I jumped at the chance to spend an afternoon with her. As the most fashion conscious person in the world, I wanted to find out her style secrets. 

Metro, 88 year old White Stuff model Sylvia re styles young journalist Kirsten, photography Natasha Pszenicki, HMU Desmond Grundy
Metro’s visiting fashionista, Sylvia Ezer (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)
Metro, 88 year old White Stuff model Sylvia re styles young journalist Kirsten, photography Natasha Pszenicki, HMU Desmond Grundy
Metro reporter Kirsten Robertson (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)

As a teenager – with a full-face of terrible acne that lasted years – I embraced our black school uniform and clothes that would help me blend in. That mindset of ‘not standing out’ has continued on until adulthood where I’m still pretty nervous to veer away from a dark hoodie and jeans combination.

So meeting Sylvia was quite the jump. Her love is colour, and colour gets you noticed. 

As I got glammed up, 5’2” Sylvia reached up to the rail to investigate her options. She held up each one as she expertly envisioned what could be paired together.

But would I like what she chose? Here’s how we got on…

Sylvia's makeover magic: outfit by outfit

Look 1

Sylvia’s mantra is colour and comfort (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)
Sylvia’s mantra is colour and comfort (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)

First outfit was a knitted white jumper with a sprinkling of colour on the sleeves, Sylvia’s speciality, teamed with a rusty corduroy long skirt.

Sylvia says: ‘Colour as key and this earthy, brick style red is one of my favourites – it takes me back to my upbringing in South Africa. Going for a skirt rather than pairing a jumper with jeans is an easy way to elevate a classic look, so you can wear it anywhere.’

Kirsten says: ‘Coupled with a long red skirt, it made for a very cosy piece of autumnal wear that could take me from the office to after work drinks. I’d definitely never worn a skirt as long, it felt fairly alien, and I was definitely nervous about pulling it off. Longer skirts do seem to be getting back into style again, Sylvia is onto a new trend here.’

Jumper: £75, White Stuff

Skirt: £38, Next

Look 2

Sylvia’s order of the day was colour, colour and more colour (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)
Sylvia’s order of the day was colour, colour and more colour (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)

Second outfit included some striking pink trousers coupled with a pink high neck fluffy jumper.

Sylvia says: I chose to roll up the sleeves, this outfit means business. It’s the perfect example of how colour can make you smile – this would liven up any trip to the office. Two simple choices which make a big impact.

Kirsten says: ‘I must admit, Sylvia’s second choice for me looked pretty daunting on the rail. Bright pink trousers and a fluffy pink jumper – a pairing I wouldn’t normally run a million miles from. But Sylvia gave me the confidence to pull it off after some words of encouragement to trust her, and I was glad I did. Not just the office, it would be fun for any girls afternoon or suit for some winter nights out – where being warm is just as essential as looking good.

Trousers, £38, River Island

Jumper: Pink High Neck Jumper, £40

Look 3

Twinning with a green velvet blazer (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)
Twinning with a green velvet blazer (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)

Our third outfit provided a chance to match up fashionista Sylvia with the fashion guinea pig Kirsten. The 88-year-old went with a plain white t-shirt and the 27-year-old with a pair of wide-length jeans. A smattering of buttons and deep velvet green completed the look on our matching blazer.

Sylvia says: ‘The blazer was a key fashion piece I’ve seen reinvented dozens of times over my decades in London. But again, simplicity is key. Paired with a set of smart jeans and stunning shirt, the blazer could be the perfect choice for a spot of networking or to elevate a work outfit. 

Kirsten says: ‘When I first saw them on the rail I thought they would be far too big for me, but the oversized look worked wonders. This is something I’d love to wear round the office or on a Sunday stroll to the shops, this was my favourite of Sylvia’s selections.

Blazer: £75, White Stuff

Jeans: £38, River Island

Shirt, £39.50, M&S Autograph Collection

Look 4

Sylvia chose a pair of trousers not dissimilar to what she wears to host lunches (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)
Sylvia chose a pair of trousers not dissimilar to what she wears to host lunches (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)

The final outfit of the day reflected a key component for Sylvia – comfort. She picked out a pair of brown cord trousers and a cosy bright green jumper.

Sylvia: This kind of outfit is perfect for hosting duties. Just the other day, I held a lunch party in a similar pair of White Stuff trousers and I was able to dash back and forth the kitchen in style. They’re super comfortable and last a long time.

Kirsten: As Sylvia says, this comfortable outfit would be ideal for having friends over. The trousers really were comfortable and, really, perhaps the most easy-to-repeat way of switching up my boring jeans and hoodie style. The combo was also perfect for not letting chilly temperatures get in the way of a nice outfit, or for fading into the background. 

Trousers: £44.25, White Stuff

Jumper: £29.50, M&S

Conclusion

While the overall experience of being a fashion guinea pig was daunting, it really was a learning experience and showed me that style doesn’t have to be as scary as the Instagram reels or perfectly curated social media posts make out. As Sylvia says, the experience should be a joy, not a chore.

She did take me out of my comfort zone initially but it was good to be encouraged to try out bolder colours and combinations I would not have considered myself 

Inspired by the likes of Maggie Smith who – at the age of 88 –  became the new face of fashion brand Loewe’s, Syvlia taught me that any outfit can stand out – but there’s a key accessory needed if you really want to make it pop: confidence.

‘With getting older, I have learned more to wear what makes me happy. You can always make something your own with confidence,’ Sylvia explains.

Thanks to her stylish eye I will definitely be bolder and braver when I look through the high street fashion rails in the future and not always head for the dark colours all the time. I’m definitely going to be more daring in my colour choices in future.

Sylvia's beauty regime

Metro, 88 year old White Stuff model Sylvia re styles young journalist Kirsten, photography Natasha Pszenicki, HMU Desmond Grundy
White Stuff model Sylvia reveals all (Picture: Photography Natasha Pszenicki)

While we had her, we wanted to find out Sylvia’s beauty regime that’s helped her stay looking fabulous over the years.

She told us that her must-have piece of make-up is the Clarins Joli Rouge lipstick. ‘It’s a shade of orange and adds a lovely pop of colour. I’ve very fond of it and have replenished it several times over the last few years. The lipstick lights up my face.’

Occasionally she will dip into a brown shade of Lancome lipstick, but she says this ‘depends on my mood’. She’s partial to a Lancome foundation each day as well.

When it comes to keeping her skin fresh, she has a strict evening routine. But she’s not devoted to a particular brand, she’s happy to find whatever is the most ‘economical’ in Boots. Syliva starts by using a cleansing milk then wipes it away with a tissue or soft sponge.

She repeats this twice to make sure she’s captured all the dregs of the day. ‘Then I’ll use some eye-make up remover, add some serum, then use my night cream. Occasionally I’ll use an eye cream.’

A No 7 lipbalm comes next, especially in winter.

‘I never go to bed without taking off my make-up’, Sylvia adds. ‘When it comes to my night routine, I use products which are on sale, never anything too expensive. I do have a lot of skin damage from when I was younger, I never wore sun cream.

‘We weren’t taught all that, we would even put things like lemon juice on our face. We didn’t realise how bad that was. So I have to keep my face hydrated, at morning and night I use a Garnier Rose Water miscellar cleanser, which I wipe on with a cotton pad.’

Photographs by: Natasha Pszenicki, Hair & Make Up: Desmond Grundy

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MORE : I’m a glamour model at 42 and don’t ever want to stop showing my ‘wibbly bits’

MORE : How feminist fetish-inspired fashion became the party look of the year

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I’m a glamour model at 42 and don’t ever want to stop showing my ‘wibbly bits’  https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/17/im-a-glamour-model-42-dont-ever-want-stop-showing-body-19823787/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/17/im-a-glamour-model-42-dont-ever-want-stop-showing-body-19823787/#respond Fri, 17 Nov 2023 10:33:15 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19823787
Chrissie Wunna loves nothing more than showing off her body (Picture: Chrissie Wunna/Getty)
Chrissie Wunna loves nothing more than showing off her body (Picture: Chrissie Wunna/Getty)

It’s been several years since topless models vanished from the pages of tabloid newspapers.

The ‘saucy’ shots were deemed sexist and outdated following a widespread campaign by author Lucy-Anne Holmes and sparked discussions on the overall representation of women in the media.

But whether you loved it or loathed it, the infamous Page 3 undoubtedly acted as a launchpad for many glamour models still working today.

Chrissie Wunna, 42, is one of them.

Her career took off after she began taking her clothes off in national newspapers, until, she believes, ‘pearl-clutchers’ took her ‘freedom’ away. However, it didn’t stop Chrissie from pursuing her dream job and she’s still making money as a glamour model today.

‘I’m one of the oldest working page three model in the world,’ she tells Metro.co.uk’s Smutdrop podcast this week. ‘Isn’t that nuts?

Smut Drop: ?Being a Page Three model made me feel sexy, beautiful and powerful? (Picture: Chrissie Wunna/Getty)
The model doesn’t wan’t to apologise for getting her kit off for cash (Picture: Chrissie Wunna)

‘To me, even from a young age, the idea of being a glamour model was iconic. I never felt taken advantage of. I felt sexy, beautiful and powerful.

‘If we can and we want to [get naked] then we should be able to and not apologise. It’s a full term career and a money making machine at the same time.’

While Chrissie insists she respects the opinions of those who are anti-Page 3, she adds, ‘They might just want to have cups of tea in Harrods and think that’s beautiful – and that’s fine. But I might want to swing off a chandelier in a sequined bikini. That’s beautiful, too.’

Brought up in Doncaster by her doctor parents, Chrissie dreamed of a modelling career from a young age, and would peek at page three when her father bought the paper home.

At 19, she made a bold move to LA, where she managed to secure a job as a model for Playboy while she pursued ‘serious’ acting roles, but eventually came back home when her Hollywood career didn’t take off as planned.

It was back in the UK that Chrissie tried her hand at glamour modelling and says she has never looked back.

‘I was just meant to be a glamour model, it’s my calling.’ the mum-of-two, tells Smutdrop host Miranda. ‘I must have been a showgirl in my last life as I genuinely love it with all my soul.

‘In my thirties I was sleeping with random boys, getting divorces left right and centre and having babies – all kinds of stuff. Afterwards I was like “right, I’m going to take myself seriously now I’m a mum. I’m going to be a serious actress again.”

Smut Drop: ?Being a Page Three model made me feel sexy, beautiful and powerful? (Picture: Chrissie Wunna/Getty)
Chrissie says she felt ‘sexy, beautiful and powerful’ appearing on Page Three (Picture: Chrissie Wunna)

‘But I ended up needing money so tinkered back to glamour modelling. It was in my forties I was like “what I’m good at is taking all my clothes off and celebrating my wibbly bits..” So I decided that it must be a talent.’

Chrissie – who is based in Leeds – will celebrate her 43rd birthday next month. She has no plans to retire her bikinis or lingerie and never wants to stop taking pride in her body.

She’s been on Naked Attraction and First Dates, and runs a popular OnlyFans account. Not to mention, she’s a regular lunchmate on Steph’s Packed Lunch. Having amassed an army of fans after her appearance on Naked, Afraid and Alone, Chrissie admits she might not have been in the ‘best shape’ at the time, but simply doesn’t ‘care any more’.

It’s the freedom of being comfortable naked more than the look of her actual body which she likes, she explains.

‘Sexy is something you feel on the inside. I know that sounds so cliché, but I still feel like I’ve got it and when you’ve got it you’ve got to flaunt it,’ adds Chrissie.

‘I want to be 80 years old having a rum in an old people’s home saying “you know what, when I was 40 I was hot. The nation saw my wibbly bits and loved them.”’

Smut Drop

Smut Drop is a weekly podcast with host Miranda Kane from Metro.co.uk, touching on sex, dating and relationships.

With no holds barred, it’s the home of sex positive chat, where Miranda will be joined each week by sexperts and special guests to explore the world of the erotic.

And we want to hear from you, too! As part of our podcast we’ll be sharing listeners’ experiences, thoughts and questions on a different theme every week.

So if you want to be involved in something brilliant – either anonymously or using your bold and beautiful name – drop us an email to smutdrop@metro.co.uk or slide into our DMs on Twitter @smutdrop.

With new episodes dropping every Wednesday, you can download Smut Drop from all your usual places.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

READ MORE: Page 3: The biggest stars who appeared on the page

READ MORE: UK’s oldest glamour model, 71, says ‘I still feel like I’m 21’

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‘Wild’ Netflix documentary branded ‘crazier than Tiger King’ and viewers can’t get enough https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/16/new-netflix-documentary-branded-crazier-tiger-king-viewers-19823035/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/16/new-netflix-documentary-branded-crazier-tiger-king-viewers-19823035/#respond Thu, 16 Nov 2023 13:40:45 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19823035
Paddy Moriarty
Netflix documentary Last Stop Larrimah focuses on a small Australian outback town and the mysterious disappearance of local resident Paddy Moriarty (Picture: HBO)

It’s been over three years since Tiger King captured the nation with its eccentric characters and wild plot lines that seemed almost too unhinged to be true.

But the new Netflix documentary Last Stop Larrimah has drawn huge comparisons to the 2020 hit thanks to its batch of outlandish locals and neverending twists and turns.

Once considered a place of real community and friendship, vintage video footage included in the two-part series shows locals laughing and cuddling, cracking open tinnies of beer and drinking in the pub until the wee hours together.

Fast forward to present day, and one Larrimah resident called Cookie takes a sip from a bottle of beer, then wistfully describes them to camera as ‘the good old days’.

Located deep in the Northern Territory of the Australian outback, Larrimah was a place that quickly became forgotten by the modern world with no police station or cell reception and just a pub, a pet crocodile and a handful of residents. 

11 to be precise. That was, until one appeared to vanish into thin air.

Larrimah hotel
Crocodile loving pub owner Barry sold Steve Irwin’s father his first croc (Picture: HBO)

Enter Last Stop Larrimah, where the gripping documentary centres around the disappearance of 70-year old Patrick “Paddy” Moriarty, who was last seen on December 16th 2017.

That night, he left the town’s only pub, The Larrimah hotel, at dusk after a night of drinking.

He was reported missing after friends entered his home 72 hours later to check on him and found the mysterious scene of a half-eaten meal, his keys and beloved hat on the table. His vehicle was also still on the driveway.

A huge search of the area was soon undertaken, with officials initially believing they’d find the pensioner disorientated or dehydrated after succumbing to the blistering outback heat. However the search uncovered nothing.

It would appear that Paddy and his trusted dog Kellie have vanished without a trace.

Although initially coming across as a tightknight community, the documentary soon reveals what the police also uncovered in their investigations into Paddy’s disappearance: the small town of Larrimah is not what it seems.

Larrimah residents
Locals Mark and Karen give their version of events in the documentary (Picture: HBO)

In reality, it’s a town pulled apart by bitter disputes and furious feuds. As footage from past interviews with Paddy shows, he wasn’t afraid of confrontation and was a man loved and loathed in equal measure – living just feet from people with big scores to settle against him.

The first person in the firing line is Fran, who used to run the Devonshire Tea House where she sold her ‘famous’ meat pies shop. She had a longstanding beef with Paddy (no pun intended).

She believes he poisoned her plants and he once threw a kangaroo underneath her house. Its a dispute that appears to boil down to pies. Fran was well-known for hers and when Larrimah’s local pub owner Barry – who once sold Steve Irwin’s father his first crocodile and features his own croc in the doc – started selling them too, Paddy took his side.

Fran soon became likened in the town to an Aussie Sweeney Todd, the fictional barber of Fleet Street whose victims were cut up and baked into meat pies. In the documentary she reveals that following her neighbour’s disappearance she was eventually driven out by locals, insisting: ‘I had enough of everything. People driving past singing out, “Murderer, murderer. Where’s Paddy?”‘

Meanwhile, pub barman Richard Simpson is also a person of suspicion as he’s accused of holding a grudge against Paddy after believing his wild antics were driving away tourists. Locals Karen and Mark Rayner add that Richard was one of the few individuals that Paddy’s dog Kellie trusted.

Fran from Last Stop Larrimah
Fran was one of the suspects following her pie feud with Paddy (Picture: HBO)

‘I don’t know how a stranger would’ve gone up and killed the dog. That’s the part that confused us,’ Karen points out.

Richard is quick to laugh off the claims and insists Karen and Mark have a grudge against him. ‘[The neighbours] all went and did their individual things, made up their own little stories. Hell, we might even get famous out of this,’ he fumes.

Locals Bobbie and Karl also found themselves embroiled in this tangled web of neighbourhood wars. They had a vendetta against pub owner Barry and as a result, Paddy too. Bobbie and Karl’s daughter Diane also had issues with Paddy as she claims he and Barry burnt down her business.

Plus, Bobbie jokes that if Barry and Paddy had suffered a fallout, Barry could have fed Paddy’s body to the pet crocodile that he kept on his property.

“That’s why the crocodile is so fat,” she laughs. 

Fran also throws Barry’s innocence into question when she insists it was suspicious that it took him 72 hours to report Paddy missing.

Then there’s Fran’s burly gardener Owen.

She admits she hired him as a form of protection against Paddy’s attacks. Owen was a former boxer and a bushy, known for his sharp temper. He’d even had slanging matches with Paddy over his dog Kellie and just days before his disappearance, neighbours heard him say: ‘Get rid of that f**king dog, or I’ll get rid of it for you.’ 

Last Stop Larrimah poster
The documentary is giving viewers serious Tiger King energy (Picture: HBO)

Amidst the twists and turns, things take a shocking direction when a secret recording appears to uncover a sickening confession from one resident.

With so many twists and turns within the whodunnit documentary, fans can’t help from speculating about who they think the true culprit is.

‘Last Stop Larrimah has me boggled’ one fan wrote on Twitter. ‘At first I thought Fran did it and she fed those people Paddy’s meat in them pies. But Barry had crocodiles, had his best mate gotten in his way and he decided to silence him?

‘Then there’s Richard… Who did it?’

Unsurprisingly, Paddy’s initial disappearance propelled the small town of Larrimah into a a media circus and the game of pointing fingers only made tensions run higher between the community.

In the six years since the disappearance, most of the aging locals have either moved out or passed away. And there’s no doubt that the Netflix documentary will bring all eyes on the residents again.

However, there has been some good news too. The town has finally had fresh life breathed into it, with new pub owners Ondra Hadras and Lucie Minarikova welcoming their son Matthew, the first baby in in the town for 40 years.

How long this newfound sense of community lasts is anyone’s guess, as mystery surrounding the disappearance Paddy and his dog Kellie, may well be one that Larrimah takes its grave. 

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‘I didn’t pick up the phone the day my brother disappeared, the guilt I deal with is unbearable’  https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/15/i-didnt-pick-phone-day-brother-disappeared-19820584/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/15/i-didnt-pick-phone-day-brother-disappeared-19820584/#respond Wed, 15 Nov 2023 08:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19820584
Shaune's photograph will be shown on Govia Thameslink services as part of the desperate search into his disappearance (Picture: Suzi Maltwood)
Shaune’s photograph will be shown on Govia Thameslink services as part of a new campaign (Picture: Suzi Maltwood)

Suzi Maltwood was having a busy day at work when she saw her brother Shaune’s name flash up on her phone.

Instead of picking it up, she let it ring out, vowing in her mind to call him later. But, by then, it would be too late.

‘The last time I heard from Shaune, he’d been very reliant on me,’ Suzi tells Metro.co.uk.

‘He hadn’t been well with his mental health, so we’d been speaking almost daily. But that day I was making up hours at work after taking time off to support him. Now I live with an unbearable amount of guilt.

‘Every day I wonder if I’d just answered the call, “would Shaune have never gone missing?”.’

Despite his mental health struggles Shaune, who went missing on June 21, 2017, had also been positive about his future. Then 45, he was busy as manager of several London-based businesses – including a cleaning company.

Suzi Maltwood and Shaune Jones
Caption: Suzi Maltwood (right) says she'll never give up hope of finding her brither, Shaune Jones (Picture: Suzi Maltwood)
Suzi Maltwood (right) says she’ll never give up hope of finding her brither, Shaune Jones (Picture: Suzi Maltwood)

He lived in Eltham, but the father-of-five loved to visit the Isle of Sheppey – an island off the northern coast of Kent – with his two dogs or for holidays with his family.

The last sighting of Shaune before his disappearance that summer’s day was at a caravan park in the village of Eastchurch on the island, where he’d travelled to sell a van.

‘He was always a happy-go-lucky type of person and absolutely loved his children and granddaughter. He had a passion for flashy cars,’ remembers Suzi, 42.

‘Many years ago, I would have been sick of hearing about his cars, but now I would do anything to talk to him about the latest BMW Sport.’

There have been no clues over the last six years as to what happened to Shaune. There are no bank records, GP appointments, or work records. 

He hasn’t used his driving licence or passport, and Interpole confirmed to his family that he hasn’t appeared to have left the country. Police investigations into his disappearance have yielded on results. 

For the first few days of Shaune’s disappearance, it didn’t quite feel real for his family.

Suzi added: ‘I remember thinking “what if he isn’t going to come home?” but I would just brush it off. It wasn’t until a week or so into Shaune’s disappearance that the panic really set in.

‘I find it hard to describe exactly how it felt because it was like having your life turned upside down, but amongst all of the panic and worry, I’ve always had hope that one day he will come home.’

Wednesday: 'I didn't pick up the phone the day my brother disappeared, the guilt I dealt with was unbearable' Shurland Dale Holiday Park Kent
Shaune was last seen at the Shurland Dale Holiday Park on the Isle of Sheppey (Picture: Facebook)

Following his disappearance, Shaune’s family searched homeless shelters, had his face printed in the Big Issue and frequently shared missing poster on social media. Suzi still posts his picture on Isle of Sheppey Facebook pages in case she can jog someone’s memory. 

She’s been left desperate for closure on what happened to her brother and how he potentially spent his final day.

Growing up, the pair were like ‘mates’, rather than bickering siblings, adds Suzi. It was a bond that continued well into adulthood, as the pair remained close.

Suzi added: ‘Shaune and I were inseparable as children. I remember us doing everything together, and whenever Shaune left the house without me, I’d always be waiting with excitement to see him when he came home. We never lost this closeness over the years and I’d do anything to get it back again.’

After so many empty years, she understands the search may seem fruitless in the eyes of others.

Caption: Suzi Maltwood and Shaune Jones stand together (Picture: Suzi Maltwood)
Suzi says and Shaune was a ‘happy-go-lucky’ man to his loved ones (Picture: Suzi Maltwood)

‘What keeps me going is knowing that Shaune would do the same for me,’ she explains. ‘He would never give up and neither will I.

‘I will fight every day to keep my brother in the public eye so that there are as many people as possible helping me to search. The pain never goes away, it just gets harder every day not knowing if he’s even alive. 

‘Over the years Shaune has been missing, it’s been a huge struggle for us as a family. I’ve been living without my brother, my mum’s been living without her son, his children have been growing up without a father. 

‘We need closure so badly that we are considering having him declared deceased when it reaches seven years of him being missing,’ adds Suzi.

‘Neither his children nor granddaughter understand what went wrong. Our mum is really struggling with Shaune being gone and believes that she’ll never know what happened to him in her lifetime. Every day is a battle to try and find Shaune.’

Caption: A set of footsteps at Platform One of London Blackfriars represent the Safe Way Home campaign
A set of footsteps at platform one of London Blackfriars represent the Safe Way Home campaign

However, it’s the not knowing that’s the hardest part, says Suzi. ‘It’s a complicated type of grief and something we are still navigating every day,’ she admits. ‘The scariest part is that there’s a chance we’ll never know what happened to him and there’s no closure until we do.’

Six years after Shaune went missing, fresh hope is being offered to Suzi and her family, as his story is being included in a new campaign by Missing People. 

The charity has collaborated with Govia Thameslink Railway (GTR) on a project called Safe Way Home. 

With one person going missing every 90 seconds in the UK, it’s the equivalent of40 people in a single rush hour or daily commute. To represent this figure, 40 sets of disappearing footprints are on display on Platform One at Blackfriars station, set to be seen by more than 100,000 people every day.

What’s more, customers logging into Wi-Fi onboard Southern, Thameslink, Great Northern and Gatwick Express trains will see a different missing person each week.

For Suzi, this could help find the final piece of the jigsaw puzzle in finding out what happened to her brother that fateful day in 2017.

Suzi Maltwood looks at the camera seriously while wearing a black jumper.
Caption: Suzi works tirelessly to 'keep up the momentum of public support' surrounding Shaune's disappearance
Suzi works tirelessly to ‘keep up the momentum of public support’ surrounding Shaune’s disappearance (Picture: Suzi Maltwood)

‘The longer Shaune is missing, the harder it is to keep up the momentum of public support,’ she says. ‘I am so grateful for the partnership between Missing People and Govia Thameslink Railway because it’s given me a new platform to get a really important, and often forgotten, message out about Shaune. 

‘Any information and any help that anyone can provide to help find Shaune is so very appreciated. 

‘The added exposure across GTR’s Wi-Fi login pages might jog someone’s memory – it could only take one person to help bring him home to us.’

Meanwhile, Suzi urges anyone who is going through her similar ordeal, never to give up hope. 

‘Do what you can to keep them in the public eye, so that you’re not the only one searching,’ she advises. 

‘Missing People has been amazing at keeping Shaune in the media every couple of months and the partnership with Govia Thameslink Railway is another brilliant way to get my brother’s story out there.’

There will also be digital posters of missing people, such as Shaune, at selected sites across the entire GTR network.

Anyone who is affected by someone going missing or is thinking of going missing can call or text Missing People on 116 000. Shaune’s appeal will be shown from 11 – 17 December across Southern, Thameslink, Great Northern and Gatwick Express Wi-fi login pages.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

READ MORE: ‘Woman with the flower tattoo’ is finally identified 31 years after her murder

READ MORE: Dan Walker relieved two missing teenagers from his TV show have been found

READ MORE: British holidaymaker found dead after going missing during walk in Jamaica

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Metro’s Formula for Change petition hits 50,000 signatures after Ladbaby support https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/14/metros-formula-change-petition-hits-50-000-ladbaby-support-19820198/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/14/metros-formula-change-petition-hits-50-000-ladbaby-support-19820198/#respond Tue, 14 Nov 2023 11:46:35 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19820198
Picture shows a young baby being bottle fed by a woman - with a Formula for Change logo in the corner
Metro and Feed are on a mission to make baby formula more accessible for families (Picture: Getty/Metro.co.uk)

SIGN OUR PETITION HERE

Parents in the UK could be one step closer to finding affordable ways to buy baby formula, after Metro.co.uk’s Formula for Change petition hit over 50,000 signatures.

Created with family support charity Feed, the campaign is calling on the government to change outdated guidelines on how baby formula can be purchased, especially in light of skyrocketing prices amid the cost-of-living crisis.

Under current rules, formula milk products fall into the same category as tobacco and lottery items and aren’t available to buy with cash alternatives.

As a result, cash-strapped families can’t pay for a tub of baby formula using a loyalty card or coupons and retailers are banned from promoting it in any buy-one-get-one-free deal. Although some supermarkets now allow gift vouchers to be used, not all do. 

A graphic which shows how you cannot buy baby formula with loyalty points at any major supermarket
You can use loyalty points on energy drinks or sweets, but not on baby formula (Picture: Metro.co.uk)

Influencer Ladbabymum – real name Roxanne Hoyle – is the latest famous face to back our Formula for Change campaign.

‘I do feel like it can change a lot of mum’s lives in the UK if we can get enough people to sign it’ Roxanne told her 1.3 million Instagram followers recently.

Fellow well-known supporters include Katherine Ryan, Ashley James and Michelle Heaton, alongside MP Preet Gill and MSP Monica Lennon.

Images shows Nadia Essex, Lydia Bright, Ashley James, Katherine Ryan, Michelle Heaton, Kelsey Parker, Georgia Kousoulou have all backed the Formula for Change campaign (Picture: Shutterstock/Getty)
Nadia Essex, Lydia Bright, Ashley James, Katherine Ryan, Michelle Heaton, Kelsey Parker, Georgia Kousoulou have all backed the Formula for Change campaign (Picture: Shutterstock/Getty)

Our 50,000 signature milestone comes just as the World Health Organisation (WHO) joined demands to take action over the price escalation of baby formula.

Companies are ‘exploiting’ vulnerable British families, WHO declared, calling out the ‘profit-driven’ manufacturers for ‘manipulating the price’ of their products – with even the cheapest brand increasing by 45% in the past two years. 

Many baby banks in the UK have also spoken out about the difficulties of meeting the demand for formula as the cost of living crisis worsens.

Alison Reynolds, who co-runs the Little Smarties Baby Bank in Cardiff told Metro.co.uk: ‘People end up in circumstances that aren’t their fault, they deserve to have help on hand instead of having to reach out.’

Since Formula For Change was launched earlier this year, it has received the backing of the Labour Party who challenged the ‘outdated’ rules in place, along with Richard Walker, CEO of Iceland, who decided to ‘illegally accept vouchers’ in his stores to help struggling families buy baby formula.

Just last month, Formula for Change was awarded the prestigious Making A Difference award, which was voted for by the public, in recognition of our drive for change. 

FORMULA FOR CHANGE: HOW YOU CAN HELP

Join Metro.co.uk and Feed in calling on the government to urgently review their infant formula legislation and give retailers the green light to accept loyalty points, all food bank vouchers and store gift cards as payment for infant formula.

Our aim is to take our petition to No.10 to show the Prime Minister this is an issue that can no longer be ignored.

The more signatures we get, the louder our voice, so please click here to sign our Formula for Change petition.

Things need to change NOW.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

READ MORE: Baby formula companies ‘manipulating prices’ for vulnerable UK families, WHO says

READ MORE: Labour vows to change ‘outdated and damaging’ restrictions on baby formula

READ MORE: ‘Even with both parents in work, some families can’t afford the basics – they are fighting to survive right now’

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I pledged to go on 50 first dates in 2023 — it’s been eventful https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/13/pledged-go-50-first-dates-2023-went-19789638/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/13/pledged-go-50-first-dates-2023-went-19789638/#respond Mon, 13 Nov 2023 06:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19789638
A woman wearing a blank tank top
Hannah Zaslawski is on a mission to go on 50 first dates (Picture: Hannah Zaslawski)

‘We’re going to meet at a pub somewhere,’ Hannah Zaslawski says to her followers, as she frantically gets ready for a date.

In the next clip, she’s grinning at the camera. ‘He’s actually super cute!

‘My hands were really cold and he grabbed my hand and was like, “I’ll warm it up for you.”

This running commentary has became familiar to Hannah’s 86,400 TikTok followers, as she documents her ‘50 first dates’, a challenge the Australian-turned-Londoner set herself in January 2023

Cut to the next morning, and her grin is even wider. ‘We stayed up until 6am talking about everything. He said he’s going to teach me how to play PlayStation.

‘I can honestly say that was the best date I’ve ever been on, in my whole life.’

The PlayStation guy (who ended up ghosting Hannah) was number 15, but now, 10 months on from starting her quest, the 30-year-old event manager has been on 33 first dates.

Hannah launched her plan when she moved from Sydney to Hackney, East London, in June 2022, and didn’t know anyone. 

‘I was going on dates to explore the city and to meet people. Then I was telling my friends about my dating stories, and I was like, “you know what? I’m gonna post about it,”’ she tells Metro.co.uk. 

As she began chronicling her quest for love on TikTok, people started to take notice – you’ve probably been served one of Hannah’s videos on your own FYP.

She says she wasn’t worried about the internet’s reaction or people getting the wrong impression of each date, because she knows the truth of each date.

‘[My date and I] know what really happened – the audience is only getting very small snippets of a few hours,’ she says. 

But while Hannah’s initial goal was to get in a relationship, 33 dates later, she realised there may have been a different agenda for her project she wasn’t quite aware of.

‘I think that subconsciously I was starting the series because I couldn’t understand why I was single,’ she says. 

The TikToker explains that her friends were all settling down, but she’d been single for seven years. 

‘It was a way for me to look at my dating track record to see why I wasn’t in a relationship,’ she adds. 

A woman holding two aperol spritzes
Hannah moved to London in June 2022 (Picture: Hannah Zaslawski)

Documenting it all on TikTok, her dates have included a guy (date 12) who only had a jar of olives and half a bottle of rosé in his fridge – ‘you can’t even make a cup of tea!’ – a guy who didn’t bother to turn up (date 11), salsa dancing in her living room (date 21), getting ‘hot and heavy’ on the beanbags of a library (date eight) and getting picked up in the aisles of Aldi (date 21). 

Hannah, who’s bisexual, says she has also learned that not only are men just as nervous on dates, but also that, in her opinion, women are way easier to spend time with.

‘I think men put up more facades, but with women it feels like you’re on a date with a friend’. 

Plus, Hannah adds, she’s discovered a thing or two about heartbreak. Her mantra? ‘There’s always another one. On to the next, baby!’ she says joyfully. She also doesn’t believe in putting up with anything you deserve, because after all, ‘you’re the prize,’ Hannah says proudly. 

Accumulating this knowledge has certainly changed the way Hannah dates over the months, something she calls a ‘year of growth’. 

‘When I started this series, my idea of dating was like going out drinking with them and having a wild night,’ she explains. ‘Whereas now, I don’t do that. Don’t get me wrong – I still would, but the dates are a lot shorter, as I end it earlier. It’s coffee dates more so these days, or drinks, but it ends after having three.

‘I feel like you get to know them more genuinely if it doesn’t turn into a big night.’

A woman smiling during golden hour
Since the start of the series, the way Hannah dates has changed (Picture: Hannah Zaslawski)

While some of the dates were average and others a little annoying, Hannah says there have been three which were ‘amazing’. 

Date 20, which was posted on May 28, 2023, has been her best so far, she adds.  

Having met a guy in a fuzzy hat in Printworks, they immediately hit it off. ‘We spent the whole night dancing with each other,’ she told her TikTok followers while doing her makeup on camera. 

It went so well that they began to see each other. The pair went on several dates, including to the theatre and even had some rom-com worthy two-hour phone calls. 

She even told him about her dating series and slowed down on posting to give them time to get to know each other.  

But after five dates, he sent her a text saying he wanted to end things. 

‘He said he’s not in the right place for a girlfriend,’ she explained in a tearful video filmed at work. ‘I give a lot as a partner and he wasn’t giving me a lot back. I do deserve better.’

And despite her disappointment, Hannah says that she’s learned something new. ‘It made me realise that I really am ready to settle down and it made me clarify exactly what I want.’ 

While her initial plan was to document 50 dates, Hannah admits that she’s not sure if she will meet that number, after experiencing dating burnout.

‘I just wasn’t in the headspace to date. I wasn’t being my best self, and I wasn’t showing up fully invested in the date. It takes a lot of energy to meet with new people again, especially leaving your house in winter,’ Hannah says, adding that talking about the same things and having constant average dates began to get to her. 

Hannah also says she’s wary of telling people about her experiment.

‘Even though it’s anonymous, I’m very conscious that somebody may be seeing it and not feeling great about themselves,’ she says.

And while she didn’t feel the need to tell her dates when she first started the experiment, Hannah admits that it now feels like a ‘substantially big part’ of her life that she’s hiding. 

‘At the end of the day, it’s my life. It’s entertainment for a few people now, but I don’t want that to overshadow the fact that I’m doing this for me,’ she explains. 

A woman holding a drink in a pink jacket
Hannah wants the series to end (Picture: Hannah Zaslawski)

Now, Hannah plans to wrap up her dating experience a year after she first posted a video – January 24, 2023 – but says she doesn’t want to pressure herself to ‘squeeze in 20 dates in the next two months.’

Even so, she says that despite all the average dates, burnout and heartbreak, she wouldn’t change any of it. 

‘I like that I have that growth – I think that was really important for me to learn how I want to date and what I accept and my boundaries,’ she says. 

And if she hasn’t found a partner by then, Hannah insists she’s ‘totally okay with it.’ 

She’ll take a break from dating and probably get a dog – sounds like a great plan. 

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

MORE : Patrick Dempsey is objectively hot — but when will society celebrate the female silver fox?

MORE : The 9 to 5 ‘isn’t worth it’ — no wonder graduates are crying

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102-year-old WWII veteran reunites with wartime planes for Remembrance Day https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/12/wwii-veteran-102-reunites-wartime-planes-remembrance-day-19793897/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/12/wwii-veteran-102-reunites-wartime-planes-remembrance-day-19793897/#respond Sun, 12 Nov 2023 10:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19793897
Jack Hemmings
Jack Hemmings was reunited with a Hudson aircraft decades after he flew them in World War II (Picture: MAF)

From flying back to base with a plane riddled with bullet holes to aircrafts catching fire on the runway, these are just some of the dangers pilots experienced in World War II.

One of those was Jack Hemmings AFC, who signed up to the RAF Just before his 19th birthday. His reasoning was: ‘if I am going to fight a war, I may as well do it sitting down’ – and by the end of the battle he had become Squadron Leader.

Jack led a nautical squadron in India, protecting the Bay of Bengal so ships could deliver and take essential goods between Kolkata and the UK without being torpedoed.

He received the Air Force Cross for ‘exemplary gallantry while flying’ and later received the RAF’s Master Air Pilot award in 2017.

Four years after the war, Jack flew in the Mission Aviation Fellowship (MAF) – the world’s largest humanitarian air service – helping to carry out the first British humanitarian survey of central Africa, visiting more than 100 remote outposts across the continent.

Aviation and planes remained a passion of Jack’s throughout his life, yet despite his wartime expertise, Jack was forced to go back into accountancy after the war, as British Airways wouldn’t hire him as a commercial pilot due to his eyesight.

It wasn’t until after his retirement that Jack had the opportunity to properly take to the skies again after he bought his own plane, got a private licence, and flew privately for 20 years.

Although his entire squadron survived the war, he tells Metro.co.uk that during Armistice Day and Remembrance Sunday his thoughts are always with the people he met during training who were sent elsewhere and sadly didn’t survive.

Veteran, 102, takes to the skies in the fighter plane he flew during WW2
Jack Hemmings thought ‘if I am going to fight a war, I may as well do it sitting down’ (Picture: MAF)
Veteran, 102, takes to the skies in the fighter plane he flew during WW2
He worked his way up to become Squadron Leader (Picture: MAF)

To mark Remembrance week this year, he visited the RAF museum in London earlier this week, and was able to get up close to a Lockheed Hudson aircraft – the same planes he flew during the war.

Describing the experience of revisiting the historic craft as ‘just like old times’, Jack said: ‘I love flying because it gives a feeling of detachment from all the problems in the world – and there are a lot of problems.

‘I actually liked flying in wartime, because you don’t think about the consequences, you’ve just got to stop somebody doing something infinitely worse.

‘The Hudson was a very nice aeroplane to fly, it had been designed as a small airliner so it was meant to be comfortable, and it was.

‘It did have one weakness, when they turned it into a war plane and put gun turrets on it and bomb bays, one of the turrets was at the back end and was a big heavy affair, it made it a bit difficult to control on the ground.

‘It was prone to get out of control and get into what we called a ground loop, going around the runway in a big circle, and the undercarriage would collapse under the stress of the unusual manoeuvre.

‘Often the broken undercarriage leg would go up into the wing and burst the petrol tank, so a ground loop and broken undercarriage on fire was not rare.

‘Not frequent, but it was a weakness to be thought about on take off.

‘We got fired at lots of times and we were hit a few times, in fact my plane came back once with holes all over it, but fortunately that didn’t stop it flying.’

Veteran, 102, takes to the skies in the fighter plane he flew during WW2
Jack said seeing the Hudson again was ‘just like old times’ (Picture: MAF)
Veteran, 102, takes to the skies in the fighter plane he flew during WW2
Jack said he will be marking Remembrance Day from home this year (Picture: MAF)

This year’s Remembrance events are taking place amid two major world conflicts: the ongoing war between Russia and Ukraine, and the recent conflict in the Gaza Strip between Israel and Hamas.

Reflecting on his time in the MAF, which he describes as ‘the good Samaritans of the air’, amid the ongoing wars across the globe, Jack said: ‘There are really nasty goings-on. I do often say to my wife how fortunate we are to be in this house which isn’t in a part of the world where there’s a war going on. 

‘The older I get the more I realise how ridiculous it is to want to kill people because of what they believe in.

‘Two people can get along perfectly amicably with different beliefs, you don’t have to kill one another because of it.’

While Jack will be marking Armistice Day and Remembrance Sunday at home this year, he’ll be watching the procession at the Cenotaph in London – and has voiced his support for the pro-Palestine peace march planned for Saturday.

He said: ‘I think the idea of the groups walking together saying “we want a ceasefire” is a good idea, and I’m with the police who I believe are going to allow it.

‘Undoubtedly there will be people who want to disrupt the march because they want to keep on fighting, and I hope they can be dealt with by the police.

‘These people who want harmony and brotherhood and getting on together – let them have their say. I hope it all goes off peacefully as that’s the object of the march.’

Get in touch with our news team by emailing us at webnews@metro.co.uk.

For more stories like this, check our news page.

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Shoppers are using this trick to get a £150 dress for £22 on Amazon — but at what cost? https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/12/shoppers-using-trick-get-a-gbp150-dress-gbp22-amazon-19592122/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/12/shoppers-using-trick-get-a-gbp150-dress-gbp22-amazon-19592122/#respond Sun, 12 Nov 2023 00:01:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19592122
‘If you look at the high street … they all sell identical clothing’ (Picture: House of CB/Amazon)
‘If you look at the high street … they all sell identical clothing’ (Picture: House of CB/Amazon)

Imagine eyeing up a dress for £150 that’ll really stretch your budget, then also imagine your delight when you find an item that looks exactly the same on Amazon for £22.

High street copies of high-end designs are nothing new, but savvy shoppers are discovering that replicas indistinguishable to the naked eye are becoming easier to find.

On social media, influencers and fashion-lovers have been sharing the ‘dupes’ they’ve nabbed, after conducting reverse image searches on expensive products and finding a far cheaper alternative elsewhere.

Lifestyle creator Michelle Hobgood claimed she found a jacket on Amazon costing $39 (£32.11) that’s an absolute spit for the Zara version she was eyeing up for $89 (£73.27). Her post explaining the technique has been liked more than 9,500 times at the time of writing.

But while buying the latest look this way may seem like a bargain, some industry insiders are warning there could be a hidden cost behind this trend.

‘At no point is anyone saying this was made ethically, that the workers were paid fairly, or that the fabric was ethically sourced — we’re talking knock-down prices per unit,’ explains fashion stylist and consultant Joanne Watkinson.

‘When I look at the amount of dupes out there, it feels like open season.’

Metro.co.uk’s own Alice Murphy was ‘stunned’ when she first saw how much cheaper an Amazon version of a $60 [£49.33] dress she wanted was.

At £10, it was a literal fraction of the cost of the Faye Blue Floral Mini Dress from Colorful Natalie, and there was nothing in any of the photos from Amazon to suggest even a single stitch of difference.

It had the same print, same ribbon detailing, same silhouette.

Out of curiosity, Alice bought the cheaper dress and was surprised at how satisfied she was with the quality of the garment when it arrived.

‘There’s boning down the front that gives it a proper corseted finish,’ she explains, ‘and silver clasps that actually stay shut, unlike similar designs I’ve paid a lot more for.

‘Not bad for a piece of clothing that costs less than a cocktail.’

The similarities are striking (Pictures: Amazon/Colorful Natalie)
Alice Murphy wearing the dupe dress
Alice wearing the Amazon version (Picture: Alice Murphy)

However, when asked whether she’ll make a similar Amazon purchase in the future, Alice admits: ‘This is a hard one because while I was happy with the dress, I bought it out of curiosity.

‘I haven’t been able to shake the feeling that anything sold at such a low price point must be made unethically.

‘I feel like somewhere along the way, someone has to pay for it to be so cheap, in one way or another.’

But while we’ve all grown familiar with dupe culture – items that are similar to more expensive products sold elsewhere – being able to get a seemingly identical dress, and not even a designer imitation at that, for so much less is becoming more common.

For example, the Carmen gathered-cup stretch cotton-blend House of CB midi dress will cost you £149 when purchased via Selfridges.On Amazon, it’s listed between $15.99 – $26.95 (£13.16 – £22.19)

Both sites contain what appears to be the same image of the same model wearing a red dress – but how could lookalikes this convincing be available?

Anna Bryher, policy lead at Labour Behind the Label, an organisation that seeks to improve conditions and advocate for workers in the global garment industry, says her ‘best guess’ is that factory workers may be acting as sellers in their own right.

For instance, if a product was first supplied to a brand retailing at Selfridges, a supplier might be keen to shift leftover stock at any price they can get.

She explains: ‘It is difficult to give a definitive answer as to what is happening with these specific [products], as Amazon has no supply chain transparency requirement on suppliers to be able check (a factor that could massively improve the possibility of scrutinising supply chains and upholding human rights in fashion). However, I will say generally a few things.

‘Increasingly in fast fashion, supplier factories are becoming sellers, particularly in China. The rise of Temu, Shein, Alibaba etc. have helped supplier factories develop “drop-shipping capacity”. This means they hold orders for these companies, and when sales come in, they ship individual orders to a company hub, who ship them on to the consumer.’

This helps the business cut their spending on things like warehouses and logistics.

This House of CB dress is available on the Selfridges website for £149 at the time of writing (Pictures: Amazon/Selfridges)

‘For supplier factories, this means two things: 1. They keep the ends of orders that have not sold in their factories so [they] have to deal with this waste. 2. They have systems established for processing and shipping consumer orders, so it is just one more step to become a direct seller.

‘There are apps like Crosslist, which allow suppliers to list items on multiple platforms at once – eBay, Amazon, Depop, Alibaba and more. So you can often see the exact same picture of an item uploaded on different sites, with different price points (as guided by the algorithm to maximise sales), but fulfilled by the same factory directly.’

Anna Woods, founder of Positive Retail, also hazards a guess that these uncanny dupes could be down to excess stock being sold elsewhere, or factories themselves could be taking the initiative and stocking up on dupes of their own accord. This would, however, be a risky move because they could always end up stuck with piles of unwanted items.

‘I just wonder whether the factories and their speed are just advancing,’ she tells Metro.co.uk.

‘Perhaps it’s almost not a huge risk for them to copy [a design] because they know they’ll have buyers. They could just relabel it.’

Fashion stylist Joanne adds that another way very cheap dupes can come about is by big-name businesses using their buying powers as leverage when negotiating prices for their orders.

‘Because of the spending powers that they have, the factories will be forced to accept their terms,’ explains Joanne, who has her own slow fashion brand called By Elleven.

‘If they want their business, they could end up being squeezed on price per unit.’

Anna Woods agrees that this is another possibility, saying factories are ending up in bidding wars ‘in a race to the bottom’ because of all the competition they face for business.

‘Factories might be so desperate for the work, that they’ll lower the margins,’ she says.

Joanne believes that a lot of these big businesses can also afford to take a few losses in the name of playing the long game with customer loyalty over time.

‘Get them to spend £25 now, then over their lifetime they could get someone to spend hundreds of thousands of pounds,’ she explains. ‘And I don’t imagine these [garments] will be loss-leaders.’

This is all part of what she describes as ‘dupe culture’.

‘It’s fast fashion. If you look at the high street, there’s a huge wholesale market. They all sell identical clothing,’ she says.

According to Joanne, dupe culture started with things like designer imitations for high street shoppers, who’d be unlikely to spend hundreds or thousands of pounds on one item of clothing or the new it-pair of shoes.

This type of lookalike wouldn’t really impact sales for the big-name designers. After all, she says, they still had the prestige and exclusivity of the brand on their side, and their target markets were unlikely to overlap.

But now, you’ve even got dupes for high street items doing numbers on social media. And the wider impact of this come at a human cost.

‘The implications are underpaid garment workers,’ says Anna Wood. ‘And even more of a throwaway culture, so nobody is making conscious choices.

‘There’s still a long way to go with the general public to wake up to the depths of it. People don’t really know who’s made what, and in what conditions, the effect on the environment, or where it will end up.’

Do you think purchasing ‘dupes’ is ethical? Join the discussion belowComment Now

Meanwhile, Anna warns that dupe culture is becoming increasingly cut-throat.

She says it has resulted in people and their companies being scared to slow down and get left behind.

So the business model has become, as Anna puts it, ‘new new new…’ Something, she adds, is ‘brutal’.

Despite their concerns, our experts are clear that none of their words are said to shame fast fashion shoppers – Joanne stresses it’s about measuring ‘choice purchases versus needs’.

‘If you need a coat to keep you warm during winter and don’t have much money to spare to get one, then you’ll have to shop wherever you can afford it,’ she adds.

For her, the distinction comes from the people who do have expendable income to enjoy – and where they choose to spend it.

Metro.co.uk have reached out to Amazon, Zara, Selfridges, House of CB, and Colorful Natalie for comment.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

MORE : Italian fashion brand roasted over £4,595 knickers: ‘The most expensive yeast infection you can get’

MORE : Helen Mirren steals the show with glittering floor-length sleeves at Paris Fashion Week

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My 99-year-old gran is a Holocaust survivor – she now receives death and rape threats on a daily basis https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/11/99-year-old-holocaust-survivor-receiving-death-rape-threats-19790974/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/11/99-year-old-holocaust-survivor-receiving-death-rape-threats-19790974/#respond Sat, 11 Nov 2023 12:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19790974
Pictured: Lily Ebert (front right) with her older brother and 3 younger sisters in 1943. Her youngest brother is not in the picture. Her sister Berta on the left was murdered in Auschwitz
Lily (front right) lost her sister Berta (left) in Auschwitz. Only she and her two sisters survived

Lily Ebert was just 20 years old when she, her mother and four younger siblings were ripped from their home in Hungary and taken to Auschwitz.

With only Lily and two of her sisters living to tell the tale, 78 years after their unimagineable ordeal, Lily has begun to receive threats of death, rape and torture following the war that has erupted between Israel-Hamas.

The 99-year-old has even been accused of lying about the Holocaust on ‘behalf of the Israeli government’.

For the past three years, Lily, – who has an MBE – and her great grandson Dov Forman have run a TikTok account where they share glimpses into her life and experience during the Holocaust, while giving insight into their Jewish culture.

‘We’ve become very used to receiving antisemitic abuse, given the platform that we have,’ Dov explains to Metro.co.uk.

‘We’ve witnessed terrible comments, but not on the scale that we have at the moment. This is worse than anything I’ve ever seen.’

Dov Forman @DovForman Yesterday my great Grandma (Lily Ebert - an Auschwitz survivor) showed me this bank note- given to her as a gift by a soldier who liberated her. Inscribed, it says ?a start to a new life. Good luck and happiness?.
Lily pictured with the American soldiers who liberated the camp she was in (Picture: Lily Ebert)
EMBARGOED TO 2230 WEDNESDAY JANUARY 26 The Prince of Wales meets with Holocaust survivor Lily Ebert as he attends an exhibition at The Queen's Gallery, Buckingham Palace, London, of 'Seven Portraits: Surviving the Holocaust', which were commissioned by the prince to pay tribute to Holocaust survivors. Picture date: Monday January 24, 2022. PA Photo. See PA story ROYAL Charles. Photo credit should read: Arthur Edwards/The Sun/PA Wire
Lily was given an MBE by King Charles earlier this year (Picture: PA)
99-year-old Holocaust survivor and TikTok user @lilyebert. See SWNS story SWLSsurvivor. An Auschwitz survivor who ???never thought she would have another birthday??? is thriving in her hundredth year alive, starting it off by receiving an MBE. Last week on 29 December Lily Ebert celebrated her 99th birthday with her huge family, enjoying cake and a trip to the seaside while proving ???the Nazis did not win.??? Two days later she learned she would receive an MBE on the New Years Honours list. With the help of her 19-year-old great grandson Dov Forman, the energetic woman has a TikTok account with nearly two million followers and published a New York Times and Sunday Times bestseller.
Earlier this year, Lily turned 99 and said she was proof the ‘Nazis did not win’ (Picture: Dov Forman)

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Since the conflict erupted between Israel and Hamas on October 7, Dov says that threats have become increasingly violent as thousands of hate comments have flooded in.

‘We get replies saying Lily should be bombed. People have said they hope that what happened on October 7 is repeated to both her and me,’ he adds.

‘People saying they want to rape my grandmother, then murder her. Many have said that the Holocaust was a lie, and Lily is lying on behalf of state of Israel when we very rarely post anything political.’

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Dinendra Haria/REX (8115176i) Lily Ebert, survivor of the Holocaust Holocaust Memorial Day Service, London, UK - 26 Jan 2017
Lily survived Auschwitz concentration camp (Picture: Rex)

Over the recent years Dov has shared countless heartwarming videos of Lily, including weekly clips of her wishing TikTok a ‘Shabbat Shalom’, or Happy Sabbath.

Other videos on the account feature fellow Holocaust survivors telling their tales of survival.

However, more recently, Dov has been forced to turn off comments for a period due to the increase in violent and antisemitic comments, which have been posted on videos intended to spread awareness of the abuse suffered by those in the Holocaust.

99-year-old Holocaust survivor and TikTok user @lilyebert with her great grandson Dov Forman. See SWNS story SWLSsurvivor. An Auschwitz survivor who ???never thought she would have another birthday??? is thriving in her hundredth year alive, starting it off by receiving an MBE. Last week on 29 December Lily Ebert celebrated her 99th birthday with her huge family, enjoying cake and a trip to the seaside while proving ???the Nazis did not win.??? Two days later she learned she would receive an MBE on the New Years Honours list. With the help of her 19-year-old great grandson Dov Forman, the energetic woman has a TikTok account with nearly two million followers and published a New York Times and Sunday Times bestseller.
Now Dov helps his great grandmother tell her story online (Picture: Dov Forman)
WINDSOR, UNITED KINGDOM - JANUARY 31: Lily Ebert (left) poses for a photograph with her great-grandson Dov Forman after being made a MBE (Member of the Order of the British Empire) by King Charles III during an investiture ceremony at Windsor Castle, on January 31, 2023 in Windsor, England. (Photo Andrew Matthews - Pool/Getty Images)
Lily now lives in London and has 18 great grandchildren (Picture: PA)

With Dov running the social media accounts for Lily, she remains unaware of the extent of the comments, but he says she has been saddened by the recent increases of antisemitic abuse and Holocaust denial.

In a statement to Metro.co.uk, Lily told us: ‘To know that yet again individuals are remaining silent and not only standing idly but denying the truth and calling for violence against innocent Jewish people on social media and the streets is incredibly worrying and frightening for me.

‘I am part of an exclusive but dwindling community. It is a community that I did not choose: I am a Holocaust Survivor.’

Dov describes how October 7 was ‘incredibly difficult’ for Lily to see, as her sister and many family members still reside in Israel – while Lily lived there after the Holocaust until moving to the UK in 1967.

‘But the first thing that she and other Holocaust survivors said is that fear is a natural reaction to what we’ve seen going on both here in the UK and from what we’ve seen in Israel and it’s ok to be scared,’ he adds.

‘Ultimately, we have to be proud of who we are, proud Jews and we have to stand up and hope that people stand up together with us.’

Get in touch with our news team by emailing us at webnews@metro.co.uk.

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Something incredible is happening on London’s ‘most crime-ridden estate’ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/11/inside-infamous-estate-branded-a-dump-ann-widdecombe-19798197/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/11/inside-infamous-estate-branded-a-dump-ann-widdecombe-19798197/#respond Tue, 14 Nov 2023 15:17:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19798197
In Focus - inside the andover estate
Residents of the Andover Estate in London are on a mission to change perceptions of their home (Picture: SWNS)

A tangled network of narrow streets lead through the Andover Estate. It’s easy to get lost if you’re not from the area, with towering buildings, pinch points and a myriad of small paths weaving between hundreds of homes.

Once described as a place where ‘people sit on people’s doorsteps smoking crack pipes, doing drugs in their groin,’ the area has a reputation that’s hard to shake. 

Located in the leafy Finsbury Park area of North London, the Andover Estate is a stone’s throw away from houses worth millions. One, a three minute drive away, is currently on the market for £2,700,000.

In contrast, this sprawling housing complex is jammed with 1/2/3 bed flats- the majority of which are council housing. Standing starkly in the centre is the 10-storey high Dibdin House, famed for its pyramid design. It holds 61 homes.

This concrete jungle first hit the headlines 15 years ago, when many young people on the Andover Estate were branded ‘hoodies’ following a visit from MP Ann Widdecombe for a documentary. 

She lived with locals for three days before heading to Brixton’s Myatts Fields in South London. At time, the documentary described both as the ‘most crime-ridden estates’ in the capital.

Widdecombe compared the Andover Estate to a ‘dump’ and fumed that the atmosphere was ‘very nasty, very threatening.’ 

In one scene, the former MP and Strictly contestant met a young man outside a shop and demanded to know why his hood is up. Eventually, he replied: ‘I wear it to feel safe. I want to scare people who scare me. Not old ladies.’

Supplied picture for Andover Estate story
Ann Widdicome demanded that young people on the estate expain why they wore hoods (Picture: ITV)
Andover Estate for Metro
For many, they responded it was simply a feeling of security (Picture: Dominic Whisson for Metro.co.uk)

In response to the controversial documentary, a powerful film called ‘Beyond the Hoodie’ was made with the support of young residents, who felt the documentary took things out of context and gave ‘fake’ pereceptions.

Today, people living on the estate still face issues over drugs, crime and negative behaviour. Places like these are still a target for county lines gangs – it’s a short walk from Finsbury Park underground and rail station, offering easy access for drug dealers.

However, there’s far more to the development than meets the eye.

Although the housing complex has been synonymous with crime in recent years, it was considered ‘luxury’ when first built.

Constructed in the seventies, after the local council cleared post-war slum housing, the estate was part of a scheme to build ‘up’ to create more homes.

Three large triangular buildings soon merged into the skyline, named Didbin, Noll and Docura Houses. Blocks were christened Andover, Barmouth, Chard, Methley, Rainford and Yeovil after regional stations.

Researchers professor John Gabriel, Dr Alya Khan and Gulser Rose Kaya recently delved into the history of the area as part of a project with the London Metropolitan University. They interviewed 40 people to get a true insight into changing perceptions.

Rear of houses prior to slum clearance, Princess Road, Lambeth, London, 1914. Artist: unknown. (Photo by London Metropolitan Archives (London Picture Archive)/Heritage Images/Getty Images)
A typical image of how slum housing in London looked (Picture: (London Picture Archive)/Heritage Images/Getty Images)
File picture: The Andover Estate Finsbury Park
Dibdin House at the centre of the Andover Estate. In white, the community centre can be spotted (Picture: Joe Newman/SWNS)

‘I spoke to one lady who had been moved onto one of the upper floors in the sixties. She felt like she was in Buckingham Palace living so high up,’ Gulser tells Metro.co.uk.

‘Each flat had an indoor toilet, which was pretty revolutionary at the time. Before [in the slum-style housing] people had to run into their back garden, even in the middle of winter.’

Despite the development’s growing notoriety over the last few decades, for the young people living within the Andover Estate – it’s simply home.

‘Yeah, I know what people think [of us]’, 14-year-old Reon tells Metro.co.uk. 

In his school uniform and a Nike jacket, he’s shielding from heavy rain in the estate’s Community Centre. The lights are dim, and a rogue firework has just been let off outside. Windows are illuminated by blue light, signalling the all-too-familiar sight of the police arriving on the scene.

Reon remains unfazed by the commotion. 

‘I’ve been on the estate for three years now,’ he continues. ‘I used to live further west in the city. People will see a bunch of Black boys living here and think a certain way based on how we look or how we walk. Police come up to us for Stop and Search even though we haven’t done anything.

Andover Estate for Metro
Reon is all to aware of the prejudices Black teenagers face on a daily basis (Picture: Dominic Whisson for Metro.co.uk)

‘If I’m chatting to someone online and they ask where I’m from, they kind of respond “ooh” when I say Andover Estate. Like they’re a bit scared, or something.

‘Sometimes people bunk school and chill in the estate. That’s when they can start going down the wrong path. They might start smoking, and if you start smoking you might start selling.’

Reon and the other kids on the estate are all too aware of the brush they’ve been tarnished with thanks to their address. However, many of them are determined to change their own narrative.

Such an opportunity has been afforded through a local youth club which was launched last year to ‘bridge a gap’ within youth provision for primary school leavers. 

While younger kids can visit nearby adventure playgrounds after school, there are minimal areas on estates for older children to congregate safely.

Knowing that when teenagers start secondary school they can be at a higher risk of being exploited and drawn into serious youth violence and other criminal activity, the founders of the club wanted to find a way to counteract that.

Andover Estate for Metro
The youth club at the Andover Estate Community Centre, managed by Triston Thomas, is a place of sanctuary for kids like Reon (Picture: Dominic Whisson for Metro.co.uk)
Andover Estate for Metro
Khalil Taipow wants to be ‘the adult he never had’ to children at the youth club (Picture: Dominic Whisson for Metro.co.uk)

Lead youth worker Khalil Taipow still remembers the struggles he faced growing up in Camden in the early noughties. 

Now 23, he’s disappointed at how little has changed in the perception of Black inner-city teenagers.

‘It’s quite upsetting,’ he tells Metro.co.uk. ‘I feel I’ve definitely fed into that narrative in the past because I was in and out of trouble growing up. But I beat the odds against me and now do what I can to help others. If I can do it, anyone can. 

‘At the youth club, we want to give kids the opportunity to not only rebrand themselves, but also realise their potential. I try to be the support system for these kids, someone they feel comfortable speaking with or opening up to.

‘I want to be the adult I never had.’

His words resonate with Laura Thomas-Hockey, Head of Partnership and Development at the Manor Gardens Welfare Trust which operates the youth club.

Andover Estate for Metro
Laura sees herself in the young people navigating the complexities of life (Picture: Dominic Whisson for Metro.co.uk)
Andover Estate for Metro
She hopes to start a trainer and tracksuit bank at the youth club – but she needs donations (Picture: Dominic Whisson for Metro.co.uk)

As teenagers file into the youth club each week, she’s reminded of her own tumultuous upbringing in South London.

‘I had a lot of negative experiences growing up,’ says Laura, 44.

‘I was hanging out on the streets and didn’t go to school. So I was seen by my school as “bad”, by my parents as “bad” and by society as “bad.” I didn’t have anyone to talk to.

‘When I look at these young people, I almost see me and my friends for some reason, even though I’m in my forties now. 

‘A lot of the kids on the estate are positive, clever and building themselves an incredible future. But you can’t shy away from the fact they are living at a disadvantage. Growing up on the Andover Estate is not the same as being raised in a lovely semi-detached house just two streets away.’

Laura hopes to source donations of new trainers and tracksuits for a clothing bank at the youth club, as these are two items commonly used by gangs to entice vulnerable teenagers.

She adds: ‘I hear young people talk about the ‘Gangster’ lifestyle which has been really glamourised and, as a result, can lead people down a bad path.

‘It’s easier for that to happen to kids who are economically and socially challenged. I’m careful to use those words as we don’t want kids to think that’s the only option for them.

Andover Estate for Metro
The sprawling streets of the estate can act as a getaway route for criminals (Picture: Dominic Whisson for Metro.co.uk)

‘I think having a trainer and tracksuit bank is something really positive. And the kids are excited about it as well, they’ve been talking about doing a fundraiser. With every project we do, we want it to help young people here – and also people across the borough.’

It’s a struggle for council-funded projects such as the Andover Estate youth club which – like many community services in the UK – lies in the firing line of government cuts. Staff operate on a shoe-string budget and rely on donations.

But for the Andover Estate kids, they are hopeful. 

They’ve seen several former residents go on to forge success. They include former EastEnders TV actor Marc Bannerman and close-up magician and artist Fay Presto. 

Skinnyman, one of the UK’s top rappers, grew up on the nearby Six Acres Estate and spent his younger years with friends wandering through the Andover Estate. 

Reon feels he is now surrounded by positive role models. He’s determined to make them proud.

The 14-year-old enjoys free school meals at school thanks to the efforts of England footballer Marcus Rashford, and cites the Manchester United forward as one of his inspirations in his hopes of changing the world himself one day.

‘My life has changed in the last year. I feel I can follow my dreams now,’ he explains. ‘Youth club is just a calm place. There might be gang members outside, but we’re inside, together. 

Andover Estate for Metro
John Gabriel, Gulser Rose Kaya and Dr Alya Khan at the Andover Community Centre (Picture: Dominic Whisson for Metro.co.uk)
Andover Estate for Metro
Hundreds of people call the sprawling Andover Estate home (Picture: Dominic Whisson for Metro.co.uk)

‘If there was no youth club then loads of people would be going down the wrong path.

‘Instead of activities here, we’d be chilling on the estate outside and people from other places would come. Gangs and that.

‘We support each other on the Andover Estate. Some people can be mean though, I’d say half the people you see on the estate live in the area, while half aren’t from here.’

The issue of crime on the estate is a complex one, but residents understand the influences behind it.

Professor Gabriel tells Metro: ‘People we spoke to understood the frustrations of young people who grow up in a system where their opportunities are limited. They know the resources they perhaps had in the past don’t exist today.

‘There was a caring perception of young people from those the older people living in the estate.’’

Dr Khan, who spent time volunteering with community groups ahead as part of her research, adds: ‘Everyone is aware of the headlines they’ve read about the estate, but they have positive memories and experiences. With the youth club and other groups here, people here are building a strong sense of community every day.

‘We spent a lot of time here and got a feel for what it’s like to be on the Andover Estate. But there’s nothing like talking to the people themselves.’

Andover Estate for Metro
Triston Thomas hopes kids on the estate can realise their full potential (Picture: Dominic Whisson for Metro.co.uk)

For Triston Thomas, the manager of the Andover Community Centre, he knows the difference the building is making in providing a safe haven for residents.

‘Even if we help one person, it’s worth it’, he tells Metro.co.uk. 

‘That’s one person who will be inspired to create positive change for others. When I was 15, I had no direction. Going to a youth club in Kilburn stopped me from committing crimes or joining a gang.

‘I’d have been in prison if it wasn’t for my youth club.’

Triston, 37, learned to DJ and enjoyed a successful music career in his twenties. He met lifelong friends and soon found himself in a good place, so decided to give back.

‘I knew how lucky I’d been, so wanted to do my bit,’ he explains. ‘I bumped into my first youth worker a few years ago. He had become head of youth services in Camden by this point. That was a great full circle moment, I’d made him really proud. In the same way he gave to me, I wanted to give back to others. 

‘I know how tough it can be out there. When I see these kids, I don’t want them to get lost in that darkness.’

The Andover Estate youth club runs from 4.30 to 7.30 on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. If you can support the club in any way or would like to get involved, please email Laura here.

If you have stories you’d like to share on the history of the estate, please email j.gabriel@londonmet.ac.uk

The wider issue: why the Andover Estate isn't alone

'We need to educate young people and get them more inspired around educating themselves' says Sayce Holmes
‘We need to educate young people and get them more inspired around educating themselves’ says Sayce Holmes of Mentivity

Sayce Holmes is an entrepreneur, sports coach, mentor and activist working to improve the lives of young people.

With Mentivity, he brings opportunities to kids in London, Brighton, Barbados, Kenya and Uganda.

We asked Sayce about the situation on the Andover Estate, and if it reflects a wider issue in the country.

What kind of stereotypes do young teenagers – especially Black teens – still face on estates?

Alongside the elderly, young people are the most marginalised group for a number of reasons, the main being that people in positions of power are quick to label and blame young people for issues in society.

The truth is the younger generation do not have the power to have created these issues within society and it is adults who have created these environments that they’ve been forced to grow up in.

Stigmas and preconceptions are a huge issue that young people especially from council estates are facing, being labelled as chavs or associated with asbos and gangs essentially is dehumanizing them.

What was your own experience growing up and the influences you faced?

In educational settings I noticed people would look at me with a sense of disdain because

I’d grown up on the Aylesbury Estate. As a result of negative stereotypes associated with council estates, people would label me as something I wasn’t and use language that was counterproductive, like I was going to end up in prison if I didn’t behave in school or I wasn’t going to amount to anything.

The exterior of the Aylesbury Estate, which now only houses around 30 people, and is to be knocked down. Southwark, London. See SWNS story SWNJestate. We peek inside an estate which once had 2,000 homes but now only 30 cling on as they wait for demolition. Only a handful of doors remain in the Aylesbury Estate in Wandsworth, south London as the council have welded large metal slabs across almost every flat. It is a strange mixture of people waiting to be rehoused and others who don't want to move. Some of the residents have reported high levels of crime, but others insist the community is still abundant and their homes feel safe.
The exterior of the Aylesbury Estate in London (Picture: SWNS)

On the other hand some would assume that because I was intelligent i’d go to university, truthfully many people didn’t take the time to understand who I was.

All the above made me very confused as to who I should be or where I should be in life and without mentorship I didn’t have the support that I needed within society which made it difficult to navigate on my journey. If it wasn’t for football and education then I wouldn’t be doing what I’m doing today.

A lot of my influences were from the estate, whilst a lot from adults were negative there was a lot of positives, at the heart of it all was a very beautiful, connected and diverse community and this is what’s been instilled in me. Finally my mum, who holds family and community in such high esteem.

How does it feel to see the work of Manor Gardens Welfare Trust to transform the Andover Estate?

The Manor Gardens Welfare Trusts mission aligns with Mentivity’s focussing on early intervention, prevention and support to enable young people to navigate life and seek opportunities which will change their life trajectories and outcomes.

Black History Month: Mentoring group Mentivity on providing youths a route out of violence.
Mentoring group Mentivity on provides youths a route out of violence (Picture: Mentivity)

Health and wellbeing needs to be a massive topic of discussion as it’s linked to accessing these opportunities. If you don’t have a foundation of health and decent well-being then you cannot progress.

Their work and any work involving community is massively important, I really like how their work is underpinned by interventions and education information. The community around how they can be educated in different ways to enhance their health and well-being supports the prevention mode.

How can charities and campaign groups be better supported in helping young people?

Charities and organization need to be working in collaboration, right now we’re not working towards the same outcomes and understanding what those outcomes are going to bring.

Funding is huge, we need to find more innovative ways of funding charities, collectively we need to be innovative in terms of how we are creating opportunities to make money.

There’s more outreach we need to do in terms of business so that we can bring investments in and fund charities because you can just depend on charitable donations. It’s not sustainable. We need to have a more collectivized approach and work in collaboration, to a strategy that we all understand.

What’s the wider message?

We need to educate young people and get them more inspired around educating themselves because the education system isn’t fit for purpose, young people are not motivated to learn, there’s no passion around it.

Education needs to be linked with passion that can then be linked to a young person’s career. Once this happens with the support of a mentor, we’ve created viable pathways that they can see they can achieve and are supported to do so.

Passions need to be linked to careers, which should also link to education which can then create those viable pathways because once a young person sees they can attain something that’s linked to their passion.

There’s a lot we need to do in terms of reframing the education system, young people need to be set-up to make the critical decisions we’re then expecting them to make at the age of 18 with no prior practice of doing so.

Mentivity is allowing young people to think outside of themselves, thinking of the consequences of their actions but also understanding that they are victims in situations. Making sure all our young people know they can find solutions in collaboration with trusted adults to navigate any obstacles.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

READ MORE: ‘I didn’t fit in anywhere – until I came here’: The new generation of youth clubs changing lives 

READ MORE: What it’s really like to be a Black teen in the UK today

READ MORE: ‘We have to stop thinking of ourselves as “minorities” – we are the majority’

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Guinea pigs are massively misunderstood – we’re determined to change that https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/08/meet-the-guinea-pig-superfans-on-a-mission-to-rebrand-the-misunderstood-pet-19782082/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/08/meet-the-guinea-pig-superfans-on-a-mission-to-rebrand-the-misunderstood-pet-19782082/#respond Wed, 08 Nov 2023 07:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19782082

When Jme Eglington was going through his divorce, he found an unlikely source of comfort.

‘It was a very painful time of life,’ the hairstylist tells journalist Sharon Walia. He stands in front of several hutches as he gently strokes a golden-coloured pet.

‘Normally someone might turn to drinking or drugs, but for me, I turned to guinea pigs.

‘I don’t know what I’d have done without them. They’re like Pringles. When you start, you just can’t stop.’

Jme is one of many guinea pig fans sharing their story in the new film Keeper of The Pigs, directed by Sharon Walia.

The documentary explores society’s view of the animals as pets, companions and – in some countries – as dinner.

After his divorce, Jme had ‘put all his efforts’ into guinea pigs, which he sees as a ‘healing property’. 

He started off with a couple in hutches in his garden, before his little furry family grew. Jme began to work as a judge at shows which gave him the opportunity to travel across Europe.

keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
Jme Eglington says guinea pigs helped him navigate a heartbreaking divorce (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
He judges at guinea pig shows across the UK and Europe (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)

Not only did the pets provide solace, but he found a new family of friends within the guinea pig community.

Guinea pigs, also known as ‘cavies’ in Latin, are one of the oldest pets in the world, thought to have been domesticated as early as 5000BC. In the UK, the oldest guinea pig remains were discovered at Hill Hall House, an Elizabethan manor in Essex, in 1575.

The fluffy rodents enjoyed cult status after being celebrated in hit TV show Fleabag. There was even a guinea pig cafe in London where people could enjoy a cup of tea surrounded by memorabilia inspired by the mammal.

Sharon was inspired to make the Keeper of The Pigs after a broadcast she did forregional channel Notts TV – about Avalon Guinea Pig Rescue – went viral.

Clearly, she discovered, there was interest in the pigs.

Sharon tells Metro: ‘Guinea pigs are going through a new wave of popularity. There’s lots of TikTok videos, YouTube videos and Instagram accounts dedicated to them.

‘And of course they featured in Fleabag. But with that kind of popularity there is sadly also a rise in hoarding, neglecting and dumping of guinea pigs. 

In the show, Fleabag (Phoebe Waller-Bridge, right) copes with the death of her best friend, Boo (Jenny Rainsford). Before Boo died, the two ran a guinea pig-themed cafe together.
A guinea pig-themed cafe is a key plot point in the show Fleabag (Picture: Courtesy of Amazon Studios)
keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
This year’s ‘Best in Show’ winner in France (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)

‘I wanted to tell all sides to the story.’

Sharon has three guinea pigs of her own; Nugget, Sweep and Brule.

Keeper of The Pigs delves into the vast, often unseen, multiverse of guinea pig superfans. Shows take place which put owners go head to head to determine the Best in Show.

However, Sharon’s most gut-wrenching part of filming came when she visited Peru, a country where guinea pigs are not friends, but food.

At an Incan festival, locals dedicated songs and chants to the small but mighty rodent. This was before the guinea pig was deep-fried and offered up at nearby food stalls.

Vegan Sharon told Metro: ‘I’ve had comments on Facebook from people who won’t see the film because of the fact it shows guinea pigs being eaten.

keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
Incas host ‘Caxa-Cuy’ each year, a festival dedicated to guinea pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
Locals see the rodent as a normal source of food, as meat-eaters in the UK would see bacon or beef (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)

‘But you cannot make a film about guinea pigs without mentioning Peru, it’s impossible. You have to tell the whole story. Plus, I’ve never been to a country that celebrates any animal like Peru does the guinea pig.’

While in Peru, Sharon also heard about how the guinea pig industry provides vital employment for many women in South America. She spoke to one mother who was able to send her children to school thanks to the profits she’d made in the industry from farming the animals.

She also visited Carmen Felipe-Morales, who found a way to transform the microorganisms of guinea pig poo into compost and gas. Doing so creates less pressure compared to using the excrement from a larger animal, such as a cow or goat, for the same purpose.

Carmen and her husband Ulises Moreno have near to 1,000 guinea pigs to make the feat possible. 

The experiment has been so successful that guinea pig poo powers the stove in their home. In the film, a thick flame darts out over the stove as the pig poo works its magic.

They also have enough energy left over to fuel their gas-powered bulbs and an electric generator for their television. Anything left, they sell as compost or liquid plant feed to locals.

keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
Carmen was able to fuel her home thanks to guinea pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
Alison Byford hopes Brits can be better informed before purchasing the animal as a pet (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)

Back in the UK, Sharon sat down with Alison Byford who runs Guinea Pig Magazine. Now in its 67th issue, there’s no signs of the publication slowing down.

‘I have more content than I do pages’ Alison tells the film.

One fixture of the magazine is ‘Piggies Next Top Model’ while countless other pages offer integral advice on caring for the pets.

Alison tells Sharon that she was inspired, in part, to start the magazine by the lack of research and information available about guinea pigs. She hopes her work can encourage more thoughtful owners to adopt the pets.

‘Guinea pigs are the most abused and neglected household pet there is,’ she explains. ‘For a nation of animal lovers, we don’t half abuse these poor animals. But as they grow in popularity, so does the dumping culture.’

A large chunk of the film follows Shaz Kelly at Avalon Guinea Pig Rescue, who works eight hours a day to provide for the pigs in her care.

keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
Documentary maker Sharon Wali and sanctuary boss Shaz Kelly (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
Thousands of guinea pigs end up unwanted each year (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)

The sanctuary is likened to a maternity ward, with Shaz as ‘acting guinea pig midwife.’ She speaks of the animals arriving ‘with no hair, covered in blood, with dry and cracked skin.’ 

Meanwhile, at Cavey Corner in Doncaster, volunteers face the same surge in unwanted guinea pigs.

The charity was founded by Winston and Sue Tate in the summer of 2008. The couple fielded calls from as far as India of people asking for advice on how to care for their pets. 

On one occasion, a girl named Carly brought a heavily injured guinea pig to the sanctuary. She had witnessed a group of boys kicking the pet round ‘like a football’ before she bravely intervened.

Sadly, in 2021 – just before filming began for Keeper of the Pigs – Winston died.

He was buried in a colourful coffin, which depicted several guinea pigs on a green field.

keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
Winston Tate inspired a generation of guinea pig fans (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
He was buried in a guinea-pig inspired coffin (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)

Ellie Lowther, volunteer at Cavey Corner, described Winston as the ‘heart and soul’ of the sanctuary who taught this generation of guinea pig carers ‘everything they knew.’

In her documentary Sharon also explores misconceptions regarding guinea pigs – such as the belief they’re just a childhood pet. She thinks they should be seen in the same light as a dog or cat.

She told Metro: ‘If you go out and ask 100 people if they’d ever had a guinea pig, I bet 95% of people who answer yes had them as a child. 

‘That’s a little sad. It means they can be the pet left at the bottom of the garden in a hut, forgotten about. This film is about opening people’s eyes to the amazing people who are involved with guinea pigs.

‘Before this, I was someone who did associate them with women and children. But there are so many men – such as our rugby-star turned guinea pig judge Peter Warden we interview in the film – really into them. Talking to these people broke down a lot of stereotypes for me.’

Keeper of the Pigs may seem like a big jump from Sharon’s previous film, The Movement, which focused on everyday heroes saving refugees on land, at sea and from air.

keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
A guinea pig underway in France (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
keepers of the pigs (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)
Guinea pigs are internationally revered (Picture: Keepers of the Pigs/Sharon Walia)

But the former journalist continued: ‘My first film was very, very serious.

‘So when I’ve told some people about this film, they’ll say “oh, that’s nice and fluffy. That’s cute.”

‘But I’m trying to stress to people that this film isn’t soft and fluffy. There are some really happy and great human-interest stories, but there are also hard-hitting and powerful parts which are hard to watch. 

‘Keeper of the Pigs tells the truth about the scale of animal cruelty.  Britain is meant to be a nation of animal lovers, but if that was the case then sanctuaries wouldn’t have to exist and have to work so hard. They’re like food banks, a necessary evil in the society we’ve been left in.’

You can catch The Keepers of the Pigs in Showcase cinemas this week – book your tickets via showcasecinemas.co.uk

The film sets out to discover the forgotten history of the guinea pig, in one of the first major documentaries about the curious creatures.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

READ MORE: Guinea pig appreciation day: Things you need to know before buying a pet guinea pig

READ MORE: You can now visit the guinea pig café from Fleabag

READ MORE: Man gives his beloved guinea pigs their own room in his two-bed flat

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The Paddington rail disaster changed my life forever – but in more than one way https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/07/the-paddington-rail-disaster-nearly-killed-me-but-helped-me-find-love-19782488/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/07/the-paddington-rail-disaster-nearly-killed-me-but-helped-me-find-love-19782488/#respond Tue, 07 Nov 2023 07:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19782488
The scene after the rail crash outside Paddington station, London. On 30 March 2007 Network Rail was fined ?4 million at Blackfriars Crown Court, London SE1, for
31 people died and 417 were injured when a London-bound First Great Western express train collided with a Thames Trains local service en route to Wiltshire (Picture: PA)

Tony Jasper missed his train on October 5, 1999. 

Having recently divorced, the then 47-year-old IT consultant was commuting into London from a house he’d bought in Oxfordshire.

His usual 7:10am train from Didcot Parkway was running late. A huge crowd of impatient commuters swarmed forward when it finally appeared. Tony decided to wait up for the next service – the 7:20am – so he would be able to find a seat.

At the same time, 48-year-old divorcee Jan Vaughn waited at Thatcham station, about 40 miles west of London. 

She was working as an assistant benefit consultant in the city, but had also missed her train after a heavily-frosted car windscreen delayed her drive.

Jan, in coach C, and Tony, in coach E, were among 420 people on the First Great Western service bound for London Paddington. What happened on that fateful commute would leave everlasting mental and physical scars for those on board.

Speaking about the tragedy on the latest episode of Rescue, a podcast hosted by survival expert Donny Dust, Tony recalls: ‘There was a sudden bang. Then there was a second bang.

A firefighter checks the inside of a charred carriage of one of the two high-speed trains that collided near London's Paddington station 05 October 1999, killing at least eight people and injuring more than 160, including 20 seriously. Up to 100 people are feared trapped in the wreckage two hours after the accident. (ELECTRONIC IMAGE) (Photo by OLIVIER MORIN / AFP) (Photo by OLIVIER MORIN/AFP via Getty Images)
A firefighter checks the inside of a charred carriage of one of the two high-speed trains that collided (Picture: Olivier Morin/AFP)
PADDINGTON RAIL CRASH / DISASTER : THE 06.03AM CHELTENHAM GREAT WESTERN TRAIN CRASHES WITH THE O8.06AM THAMES TRAINS COMMUTER SERVICE TO BEDWYN AT LADBROKE GROVE 0N 5/10/99: RAIL Crash/Scene 3...The scene at Ladbroke Grove in west London Monday October 11, 1999 where work was continuing to clear the track of the wreckage of last Tuesday's crash.Investigator's combing the most badly damaged carriage found just one body, and the death toll is now expected to be between 30 and 40 people. PA photo: Fiona Hanson. Seee PA story RAIL Crash....A
Investigators combed the most badly damaged carriage in search of evidence – but also bodies (Picture: PA)

‘The third bang was accompanied with a massive orange ball of flame. And then that’s when I knew that we were seriously in trouble. 

‘A fireball rolled past my window and then came the smoke. My thought at that time was “I’m going to get crushed. I’m gonna get burnt, or I’m gonna choke to death”. 

‘It was probably about the fifth bang where the carriage was thrown up in the air.’

In coach C, Jan had briefly lost consciousness after hearing loud ‘screeching’.

She had no idea if a bomb, train fault or collision had caused the explosion. Around her, panicked passengers battled in vain to open carriage doors as a worrying smell of diesel got stronger.

Tony, meanwhile, went into ‘rescue mode’. He smashed open a window by hitting the corner of the glass, a trick he had learned during workplace training during the era of IRA bomb threats.

A policeman stares in disbelief whilst looking at the train wreckage at the scene of Britain's worst train crash for 50 years just outside London's Paddington station, 08 October, 1999. One of the trains involved in the crash passed a red signal, a preliminary report by official investigators said 08 October. Search teams have so far recovered 30 bodies from the wreckage of Tuesday's crash but police say the death toll will rise much higher. (Photo by ADRIAN DENNIS / AFP) (Photo by ADRIAN DENNIS/AFP via Getty Images)
A policeman stares in disbelief whilst looking at the train wreckage outside London’s Paddington station (Picture: Adrian Dennis/AFP)

‘I started to climb out the window,’ he explains on the podcast.

‘My overriding passion then was to get as many people out as possible because they did not deserve to be in there. I shouted instructions for people to come out, feet first, tummy down.

‘These were cuts on my hands from the glass, which had been in people’s clothing and in their footwear. When one person came out, they would shoot off and another would follow. People just kept coming. I stayed there and I guided every one of them down.’

Some passengers fled the train but others were unable to move far due to their horrific burns and injuries. One man shuffled through the crash site with his ‘skin hanging off his hands like a spider’s webs.’

‘It looked like a horror movie,’ remembers Jan, who also speaks to Donny on the podcast. 

‘There were bodies, there were people just sitting on the track side completely dazed, a lot of people were badly burned. There was a sort of silence, just this sort of disbelief on what had happened.’ 

A police officer briefs the press near the site where two high-speed trains collided near London's Paddington station 05 October 1999, killing at least eight people and injuring more than 160, including 20 seriously. Up to 100 people are feared trapped in the wreckage two hours after the accident. (ELECTRONIC IMAGE) (Photo by OLIVIER MORIN / AFP) (Photo by OLIVIER MORIN/AFP via Getty Images)
A police officer briefs the press on October 5, 1999 as the death toll from the crash kept climbing (Picture: Olivier Morin/AFP)
(Original Caption) Mourners look at the flowers that have been left for the 31 victims of the Paddington Rail crash disaster. (Photo by Neville Elder/Corbis via Getty Images)
Tearful mourners look at the flowers left for the victims (Picture: Neville Elder/Corbis/Getty Images)

News of the Paddington rail crash – also known as the Ladbroke Grove tragedy – trickled out to the public via radio broadcasts. The collision took place shortly after 8am, when people were driving to work, taking children to school, or at home starting their day. Widespread panic followed as families tried to trace loved ones who commuted to the capital.

Casualties congregated at a Sainsbury’s in Ladbroke Grove while emergency services raced to the scene.

Jan was one of the survivors who made it to the supermarket.

She recalls: ‘We’d gone through this major crash, which our brains were still trying to process, and then we came into a scenario where people were pushing trolleys around us and loading stuff into their cars. It was an unreal situation.’

Around Jan, Sainsburys staff soon jumped into action. Workers trained in first aid tended to the injured while others raced to get water, towels, blankets and chairs.

Construction workers in the car park tore ladders from their vans and carried them down to the upturned train carriages. They also helped firefighters cut holes in fences to make access to the train easier.

Tony Jasper and Jan Vaughan met through their shared experience of trauma (Picture: Tony Jasper)
Tony and Jan shared their memories of the incident on the podcast Rescue (Picture: Tony Jasper)

At the crash site, after having helped around 65 people, Tony was physically exhausted.

Covered in diesel, he stumbled away from the tracks in the knowledge he wasn’t in the right state to save any more people. Tony describes the scene as a ‘strange picnic’ as he remembers walking past pieces of clothing and bags scattered over the ground. As he left, he heard the sound of phone ringtones from within the carriages behind him. Countless phone calls that would never be answered.

Tony reached Sainsbury’s and – after using the supermarket toilets to clean his hands – simply got a taxi home. Meanwhile, Jan was picked up by her distraught parents.

‘I don’t remember much about those first few days’ she says. 

‘It was just all a bit of a blur – there was a need to see what had actually happened, the impact, of the crash. But when you see aerial footage, it’s massively confronting. And, I had to give up watching the news after a while because it was actually too upsetting. 

‘You just didn’t want to see it anymore.’

THE PADDINGTON RAIL CRASH/DISASTER. THE 06.03 CHELTENHAM GREAT WESTERN TRAIN CRASHES WITH THE 08.06 THAMES TRAINS COMMUTER SERVICE TO BEDWYN, AT LADBROKE GROVE ON 5/10/99 AT 08.11 People, believed to be relatives and friends of the victims of the London, Paddington, train crash, console each other as others bring flowers during their visit to the site of the crash Thursday October 7, 1999. Bodies were still being removed Thursday from the scene of Tuesday's disaster as 33 people were confirmed dead. Authorities fear the death toll may rise to 70 or more. (AP PHOTO/Dave Thomson)...I
Friends and relatives of the victims console each other by the crash site on Thursday October 7, 1999(Picture: AP)

The survivors would soon find out that two trains had been involved in the crash. A Thames Turbo train had left Paddington bound for Great Bedwyn in Wiltshire, driven by the recently qualified Michael Hodder. It collided with Jan and Tony’s First Great Western train at a combined speed of 130mph.

In the weeks and months that followed, survivors struggled with symptoms of PTSD. At the time, the condition was associated with veterans and not more widely associated with trauma as it is today.

Tony recalls: ‘I was once in a meeting with our small sales team that consisted of me, a salesman and a marketing director. The salesman said to me in the middle of the meeting, “You don’t seem to be paying attention, Tony.”

‘That was the first time I had this horrible shock that I was out of my depth. WhatI didn’t know was that I was sliding down the slippery slope of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. 

‘I had no knowledge of PTSD. I wasn’t expecting it and had never researched it. The idea of being mentally ill after the crash just hadn’t dawned on me.’

Tony was signed off work and put on antidepressants, but as he battled with feelings of survivor’s guilt, he couldn’t return to normal.

Britain's Queen Elizabeth II Queen meets members of the Transport Police involved in the rescue operation in last week's Paddington rail crash, during a visit 14 October, 1999 to a community centre in nearby Ladbroke Grove. (Photo by FIONA HANSON / POOL / AFP) (Photo by FIONA HANSON/POOL/AFP via Getty Images)
Queen Elizabeth II met with Transport Police officers who had been involved in the rescue operation (Picture: Fiona Hanson/AFP)
British Transport Minister Lord Gus McDonald (L), Prime Minister Tony Blair (2nd L) and Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott (C) during a meeting with senior rail industry figures at Downing Street to discuss the Paddington rail disaster, aturday 09 October 1999. (Editors please note rail figures are unidentified) (Photo by CHRIS SHARP / POOL WPA / AFP) (Photo by CHRIS SHARP/POOL WPA/AFP via Getty Images)
British Transport Minister Lord Gus McDonald, Prime Minister Tony Blair and Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott met with senior rail industry figures on October 9, 1999(Picture: Chris Sharp/AFP)

He joined the Paddington Survivors Group and when a public inquiry into the crash opened at London’s Methodist Hall in July 2000, Tony was among a small delegation who decided to attend. 

The group was spearheaded by Pam Warren, who had been sitting in first class on that fateful Paddington-bound train, going over notes ahead of a training course in London.

She had been left clambering through a broken window to escape with ‘smoke rising off her whole body.’ Pam had been in a coma for three weeks and wore a surgical mask for 23 hours a day while her burns healed.

She led the Paddington Survivors Group to pursue compensation for the horror they had faced.

A minibus into London had been organised for those left too scared to travel via train to the inquiry. That’s where Tony first met fellow survivor Jan Vaughan.

INQUIRY Paddington/Warren...Strictly for editorial use within the context of the story, no satirical or humorous use. Library file dated 10/05/2000 of Pam Warren who was severely burnt in the Ladbroke Grove rail crash in November 1999. The 33 year-old from Berkshire is due to give evidence at the public inquiry into the Paddington rail disaster in London Wednesday 17 May 2000. See PA story INQUIRY Paddington. PA photo: Matthew Fearn....a
Pam Warren, then 33, gave evidence at the public inquiry into the Paddington rail disaster (Picture: PA)
Pam Warren travels by train to Paddington Station for the first time since the crash ten years ago. PRESS ASSOCIATION photo. Issue date Monday October 5, 2009. The image of Pam Warren's injured face came to symbolise the Paddington railway crash after she suffered horrific burns requiring her to wear a plastic mask for 18 months. Pam Warren has marked the 10th anniversary of the tragedy by taking a an emotional train journey for the first time since the crash. The train trip from Slough to Paddington was filmed exclusively as part of ITV1's Tonight programme and was a major feat for Pam, who suffers from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, still has nightmares about the crash, and has been unable to board a train since that day. ITV1's Tonight programme is being aired at 8pm on Monday October 5, the 10th anniversary of the crash. For further information please contact Peter Gray 0207 157 3046 peter.gray@itv.com PRESS ASSOCIATION Photo. Issue date: Sunday October 4, 2009. See PA story. Photo credit should read: /PA Wire EMBARGOED TO 0001HRS ON MONDAY OCTOBER 5TH 2009. Undated handout image from ITV Studios.
On the tenth anniversary of the crash, Pam Warren travelled by train to Paddington Station for the first time since the crash (Picture: PA)

An investigation into the incident which nearly caused their deaths was a strange backdrop to their blossoming romance, but, nevertheless, their bond grew.

During a break in proceedings, they looked round Methodist Hall together and later the pair enjoyed ice creams by the Thames during their lunch.  

The following week they decided to meet up to chat ‘rail safety’, but deep down they both knew there was more to it than that – they were falling for each other.

After the three-month hearing ended, Jan and Tony continued seeing each other. Both struggled with PTSD and mentally low days, but supported each other through them as their relationship grew more and more serious.

‘He was a sympathetic ear,’ Jan remembers.

‘He asked my father for my hand in marriage. My father was quite shocked considering I wasn’t a young person. I can’t remember his exact words but he replied to Tony with something like “why not.”’

The official enquiry into the crash was completed in 2000. In conclusion, Lord William Cullen found that a poorly placed signal light near Paddington station likely caused the tragedy. It had been partially obscured and, with bright sunlight shining on it at a low angle, it is thought that Thames Turbo driver Michael Hodder couldn’t spot the red light.

THE PADDINGTON RAIL CRASH/DISASTER. THE 06.03 CHELTENHAM GREAT WESTERN TRAIN CRASHES WITH THE 08.06 THAMES TRAINS COMMUTER SERVICE TO BEDWYN, AT LADBROKE GROVE ON 5/10/99 AT 08.11. A policeman adds to the floral tributes Thursday Oct. 7, 1999 in West London near to the site of Tuesday's horrific train crash. The death toll from the crash has risen to 33 although authorities fear the number could rise beyond 70. (AP Photo/Dave Thomson)...I
A policeman adds to the floral tributes left near the scene in 1999 (Picture: AP)
Tony and Jan relocated to Australia - where they try not to dwell on the horrors of October 5, 1999 (Picture: Tony Jasper)
Tony and Jan relocated to Australia – where they try not to dwell on the horrors of October 5, 1999 (Picture: Tony Jasper)

Of the 570 people involved in the Paddington rail crash, 31 people died. 

In 2001, Tony and 46 others were presented with certificates of commendation for the ‘outstanding courage and skill’ they displayed on the day of the crash. It is thought an additional 19 deaths were avoided thanks to the brave efforts of passengers and first-responders.

Jan and Tony married on Valentine’s Day in 2004 and later moved out to Tasmania in Australia, where they live happily today. They recently celebrated their 19th wedding anniversary.

‘We don’t, generally discuss the crash’ Jan tells the podcast.

While Tony adds: ‘Sometimes I might go back and think, what did I do there? Did I do the right thing? How could I have done it better? But, I don’t get the intrusive thoughts that I had when we were suffering from PTSD.

‘Dwelling on the past is fine if you’re trying to learn from something, but otherwise, the crash is not in my daily thoughts. 

‘I like to enjoy the present and look forward to the future.’

Listen to Jan and Tony’s story in full here.

To find out about the Paddington Survivors Group, visit here.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

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READ MORE: We got engaged three days after we met – he proposed but I also had a ring

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People shudder at the thought of open heart surgery, but it was on my bucket list https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/05/people-are-terrifed-of-heart-surgery-but-it-was-on-my-bucket-list-19741892/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/05/people-are-terrifed-of-heart-surgery-but-it-was-on-my-bucket-list-19741892/#respond Sun, 05 Nov 2023 10:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19741892
Heart beating
My breathlessness wasn’t caused by the covid vaccine or down to my weight like I thought (Picture: Getty Images)

Get shot at by a James Bond villain – tick. Front up a band at Glastonbury – tick. Open heart surgery – tick. Yes, that’s right… having open heart surgery to replace a valve was actually on my bucket list.

Ever since I found out I had severe aortic stenosis – which is when the heart’s aortic valve narrows and blood isn’t able to flow normally – in early 2022, such a procedure went right to the top.

My journey began after having the second Covid jab in the summer of 2021.

I noticed I was becoming more and more short of breath walking up hills. I put that down to being 61, unfit and overweight, wondering also whether the vaccine had any part to play in this.

As the year drew to an end, I’d had the Covid booster jab and I was coping with my breathlessness, still thinking I should do more exercise.

Then, I over-indulged on a Christmas dessert and things took a turn for the worse.

Feeling decidedly ropey, I went to see a GP, convinced I had a lung infection that needed some antibiotics – and that’s when things escalated dramatically. She told me to get to A&E that day, adding that I should ask someone else to drive me.

After seeing heart doctors, I was booked in for an echocardiogram – an ultrasound test that checks the structure and function of your heart -which confirmed I had severe aortic stenosis.

It also meant I needed open heart surgery. If I didn’t have it, I would die. Scary stuff.

Some months later, a heart consultant booked me in for an angiogram to check whether my arteries would require bypass surgery, which would involve taking a healthy blood vessel from another part of my body and using it to create a new path for my blood to flow around the dodgy one.

If they go in once, they may as well sort it all out at the same time, he told me.

Chris Cowley in his hospital bed
Chris had to have open heart surgery to save his life (Picture: Chris Cowley)

On the day of the angiogram, blood needed to be taken but my veins were not playing ball. Two nurses had had a go before they called in Atilla the Hungarian.

Built like a second-row forward in the All Blacks, Atilla was over from Hungary to learn how we do things in our hospitals. He may have looked like someone you wouldn’t want to meet in a wrestling ring but he was as gentle as they come – and where others failed, he got the job done.

My next consultation revealed good news – the angiogram showed no clogged arteries, so surgery would just require an aortic valve replacement.

It seems simple to say ‘just’ but it turns out to be a very common procedure these days – around 300,000 people in the UK were diagnosed with it in 2019, according to a study published in the BMJ journal, Open Heart.

And without treatment, more than half of those would be expected to die within five years.

I was amazed to find out how many friends knew of someone having aortic valves replaced. This was all extremely reassuring. The alternative of leaving things as they were was not an option.

What is aortic stenosis?

Aortic stenosis is when the valve between the lower left heart chamber and the body’s main artery (aorta) narrows and does not open fully, reducing or blocking blood flow from the heart to the rest of the body. It can be, such as in my case, something I have been born with.

What are the symptoms

  • Chest pain brought on by the heart having to work harder
  • Shortness of breath – something I experienced walking up hills
  • Dizziness or light-headedness
  • Fainting or loss of consciousness

Normally, the operation for me would have been done at Derriford Hospital, Plymouth. But clearing the backlog following Covid lockdowns meant it being transferred to The Spire St Anthony’s in Sutton, south London.

I was dropped at the hospital by car ambulance from Airside Medical Services, out of Dunkeswell Airfield, near Exeter, whose driver was Jordan Roe-Lavery, a 25-year-old former sniper in the Army who was training to become a paramedic and ambulance driver.

Having achieved marksman status as a teenager in my school cadet force, it was fascinating to hear all the ins and outs of being a sniper, thereby taking my mind off what was coming my way.

On the day of my surgery, all I remember is being wheeled into a holding area before the operating theatre, talking with Dr Mahmood… and then the very next thing she had metamorphosised into Stan, from West Africa. Was I in another world? No, I was in the ICU ward.

Surgeons performing open heart surgery
Surgeons performing open heart surgery in modern operation room (Picture: Getty Images)

I had had an unfounded fear of waking up mid-procedure, so my first words to Stan were: ‘Is it done?’ He replied, soothingly: ‘Yes it is done’.

The sense of relief was overwhelming. All I needed to do now was get better.

The following few nights were hard. No sense of time, in and out of sleep, machines beeping every now and again. One in particular had three beeps which sounded to me like the ‘give you up’ bit of Rick Astley’s 1987 hit Never Gonna Give You Up. Once in my head… it was torture!

But my lowest moment was waking and touching the screen of my phone to reveal it was 3.32am. I nodded off straight away and awoke again, feeling refreshed… only to see that it was now 3.34am! The nights were long.

Still, I drew inspiration from my ambulance driver Jordan. As part of his sniper training, he had had to spend six days and nights with two comrades dug in a hole in cramped, uncomfortable conditions on the Brecon Beacons with his sights set on a compound.

If he was spotted – he failed. If he missed recording certain goings on at specific times – he failed. And no trace could be left behind at the end of the week – not even human waste (apparently an Army helmet is very useful in these situations, if you know what I mean).

Medical
The sense of relief after my surgery was overwhelming. All I needed to do now was get better. (Picture: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

That was tough. What I was going through was nothing by comparison and I just kept saying to myself: at least I’m not stuck in a hole in the Brecon Beacons. It pulled me through.

On Day 5 post-op, I was finally allowed home. A large bag of medication to see me through and instructions for exercise. Things could only get better.

The worst part of the convalescing period was the healing of the sternum – they have to break it to access the heart. And like any broken bones, it takes time. So coughing or sneezing is not something you want to do for at least eight weeks. That hurts!

Now, as I write this, it has been more than nine months. I’m doing fine. I don’t want to go running – so nothing new there. I have the occasional day when I need to slow down and rest if I have over-exerted myself. Other than that, I feel great.

So for all those who fear having this operation… don’t. Sure, it’s scary but the success rate is 98% and not going through with it really ends only one way.

And in case you were wondering about the other two things on my bucket list?

The Pyramid stage at Glastonbury
It wasn’t the pyramid stage but still (Picture: Getty Images)

Well, yes I really did play at Glasto, as the paper I worked for at the time was the media partner for the Glastonbury Extravaganza in the town’s abbey grounds.

I was having lunch with the organisers when I asked what it took to put a band on at the main event at Worthy Farm. They went through the processes involved and then, to my utter surprise, said: ‘If you want to play, Chris, we’ll find you a slot.’

I said: ‘I haven’t got a band,’ to which the reply came – ‘Well, get a band’.

And that’s how it came about. I recruited my guitar tutor, an old mate who had played other festivals on bass and a drummer friend of a work colleague.

We thought we would be playing for just a handful of friends but Chris Moyles’s newsreader Dominic Byrne and sidekick Dave Vitty – commonly known as Folk Face on the Radio 1 show at the time – were a surprise addition before us.

As a result, the Jazz Lounge had a few celebrities in there, including Moyles, which drew a much larger audience than we expected. So, nervously and with no soundcheck, we went on… and 45 minutes later, left the stage with the crowd actually shouting for more!

James Bond Series: A View to a Kill
Christopher Walken (R), as Max Zorin, next to Roger Moore who played James Bond in 1985 movie A View To A Kill (Picture: Oscar Abolafia/TPLP/Getty Images)

As for the Bond villain who shot at me? It was the evil ‘Max Zorin’ from the 1985 movie A View To A Kill, played by Christopher Walken.

Working as a local reporter at the time, I had been invited to the reopening of the 007 Stage at Pinewood Studios after it had burnt down the previous year. We were told we could have a look round – so I wandered off into the stage set, which took up half the giant hangar. As I walked round the corner, I heard ‘Action’ and Walken started firing off his gun in my general direction.

But after all I’ve been through, I say forget James Bond… call in sniper Jordan – he can take out the bad guys from more than a mile away.

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‘Saudi Arabia hosting the World Cup would tell LGBTQ+ fans we don’t matter’ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/05/the-world-cup-in-saudi-arabia-would-tell-queer-fans-we-dont-matter-19754853/ Sun, 05 Nov 2023 00:01:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19754853
LGBTQ+ fans/groups on Saudi Arabia hosting World Cup 2034
Although the Islamic state hasn’t been officially named as the host, LGBTQ+ footie fans are already planning to boycott (Picture: Metro.co.uk/Getty)

How Arthur Webber, an avid football fan from London, reacted to the news that Saudi Arabia is expected to hold the World Cup in 2034 is not safe for work.

A freelance writer, 25-year-old Arthur captains and plays for TRUK United FC, Europe’s first football team of all trans men – something his younger self would hardly believe.

So, he tells Metro.co.uk, the message FIFA, football’s governing body, is sending to football fans and players like him is all too clear.

‘I initially used language not suitable to print,’ he says, recalling when he first read the news this week of who may now be hosting the lucrative competition.

‘I feel it tells LGBTQ+ fans that ultimately we don’t matter and that money will win over any commitment to advancing equality in football.

‘I also believe it tells the LGBTQ+ community in Saudi Arabia that FIFA thinks the treatment of them by their government is OK, as long as the government pays FIFA a lot of money.’

While FIFA hasn’t officially announced the 2034 host of the world’s most-watched sporting tournament, Saudi Arabia is currently the only contender after Australia pulled out following concerns they wouldn’t get enough votes from FIFA’s 211 federations across the world.

In light of the news, Newcastle United’s manager Eddie Howe has given his approval, saying it was ‘really good’, and that he would expect a World Cup in Saudi Arabia to be well organised having previously travelled there with his team. The club has used training camps in Riyadh and Jeddah since it was taken over by Saudi Arabia’s Public Investment Fund (PIF) in October 2021.

For many though, the prospect of Saudi Arabia holding the World Cup has brought renewed attention to the nation’s human rights – including their lack of LGBTQ+ rights.

Téa Braun, the executive director of the Human Dignity Trust, a charity which monitors LGBTQ+ rights, says queer Saudis face ‘high personal risk of abuse and even death’.

‘Saudi Arabia continues to criminalise consensual same-sex intimacy, both male and female, and the maximum punishment for breaking these laws is the death penalty. There is significant evidence to show that these laws are enforced,’ she says.

Arthur Webb about to kick the ball
Arthur Weber has no plans to tune into the World Cup if it’s held in Saudi (Picture: Lucy Copsey)

‘The Trust’s position on the death penalty remains clear, it is patently a disproportionate and cruel punishment for consensual, human-rights protected conduct, and does not stand up against international law.’

While there is no law explicitly against trans people, anyone caught ‘cross-dressing’ can be jailed (foreigners can be deported) and gender-affirming surgery is banned.

The kingdom had long made its hopes to stage the World Cup clear, with its de facto leader since 2022, Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, announcing his offer only minutes after FIFA kicked off the bidding process.

After all, the nation announced a public holiday after beating Argentina in the World Cup last year. Not a big surprise, given football is Saudi’s most popular sport.

However, according to Amnesty International, under Bin Salman, the authorities have also jailed peaceful activists, carried out record numbers of executions (196 people last year alone) and women suffer routine discrimination.

Felix Jakens, Amnesty International UK’s head of priority campaigns and individuals at risk, has accused the Gulf nation of ‘sports washing’ – an attempt to use lavish athletic celebrations as a smoke-screen.

‘Anyone familiar with Saudi sports washing shouldn’t be at all surprised by this turn of events,’ he tells Metro.co.uk.

Soccer Football - FIFA World Cup Qatar 2022 Preview - Doha, Qatar - November 13, 2022 General view of a replica World Cup trophy outside the Al Thumama Stadium REUTERS/John Sibley
The World Cup being held in Qatar, a conservative Muslim nation, touched off a wave of concern among LGBTQ+ advocates (Picture: Reuters)

‌’Under Mohammed bin Salman’s rule, we’ve seen Saudi Arabia become increasingly ambitious in its use of sport to try to rebrand itself, while at the same time, the Saudi authorities have been pursuing an utterly ruthless crackdown on human rights.’

According to FIFA’s Bidding Regulations, which were developed with the UN’s human rights agency, countries offering to host the 2030 or 2034 World Cups had to commit to ‘respecting internationally recognised human rights’.

This includes FIFA officials evaluating human rights risks in the nation and contractual obligations for all organisers to respect them.

The host country’s government and city authorities must also document their commitment to ensuring that hosting the tournament would not ‘involve adverse impacts on internationally recognised human rights’.

But in Saudi, men overwhelmingly control women’s rights, freedom of expression is muffled and being gay is a crime.

Felix adds: ‘Without sustained pressure from FIFA and other bodies ahead of 2034, it’s currently hard to see how Saudi Arabia’s appalling human rights record won’t be directly at odds with FIFA’s own responsibilities and standards on human rights.’

(FILES) In this handout file picture provided by the Saudi Royal Palace shows Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman chairing the Gulf Cooperation Council (GCC) summit in Saudi Arabia's capital Riyadh on December 14, 2021. - From greeting foreign leaders to heading regional summits, Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman is taking over the reins from his ageing father, going from de facto ruler to an uncrowned king. (Photo by Bandar AL-JALOUD / Saudi Royal Palace / AFP) / RESTRICTED TO EDITORIAL USE - MANDATORY CREDIT
Crown Prince Mohammed has been on the throne since 2022 (Picture: AFP)

Liz Ward, programmes director at Stonewall, says she can’t quite believe the queer football community is in the same position as last year.

Qatar became the first Arab and Muslim country to stage the World Cup in 2022, but rights groups wasted little time criticising the event given the state’s treatment of migrant labourers and LGBTQ+ people.

‘This is the latest in the long line of Men’s World Cups being awarded to nations where LGBTQ+ safety has been disregarded or deprioritised,’ she explains.

‘From countries with severe anti-LGBTQ laws such as Qatar to countries where living an LGBTQ+ is impossible, such as Russia, to even the US where we are seeing an unprecedented cascade of anti-trans legislation, this is simply unacceptable.’

FIFA was forced to tow a cautious line around Qatar, balancing concerns from activists about the three-year-long jail terms LGBTQ+ Qataris can face without upsetting the host nation.

Qatari officials shrugged off such worries, stressing that the nation was an inclusive country where ‘everyone is welcome’.

Saudi’s tourism bureau says the same. LGBTQ+ people are ‘welcome to visit’ the country as long as ‘they follow and respect our culture, traditions and laws’.

Saudi football fans wave their country's flags from vehicles
Football is the most popular sport in Saudi Arabia (Picture: AFP)

However, Jack Duncan, 35, a gay travel business owner, is a bit more cautious in his advice to LGBTQ+ World Cup hopefuls.

‘I absolutely hate advising queer people to hide who they are for their own safety, the onus here should be on FIFA to stop rewarding anti-queer regimes with the rights to host such an important event,’ says Jack, who lives in Wandsworth, south-west London.

‘So, my advice is the same as Qatar 2022: don’t go.’

Many LGBTQ+ football fans told Metro.co.uk last year that they had no plans to travel to the tiny emirate for the World Cup.

For Arthur, it’s a no-brainer about Saudi Arabia. Expressing solidarity with queer Saudis is more important than catching the game he loves.

‘I think attending the matches would be giving my ok to the sportswashing of the atrocities that the Saudi government commits against our community,’ he says.

‘At the last World Cup, I watched matches at fundraisers held for the LGBTQ+ community in Qatar, so I think if similar events occurred for the LGBTQ+ community in Saudi Arabia I would watch then.’

Amnesty International’s Felix Jankens adds that all hope isn’t lost, though.

‘FIFA needs to learn one of the key lessons of the Qatar World Cup – which is that it must secure clear and binding commitments from Saudi Arabia over significantly improving its human rights record if it’s to be allowed to host the world’s most prestigious football tournament,’ he says.

For some though, even if money weren’t an object, the 2034 World Cup will be a no-go.

Ptolemy Horner, 19, a bisexual sports journalism student at Staffordshire University, says he wouldn’t bother booking flights. ‘Not only do they not accept us, they look down upon us,’ he tells Metro.co.uk.

‘Everyone should be accepted in the world’s sport, football.’

FIFA declined to comment. Saudi Arabia’s Ministry of Tourism has been contacted for comment.

Get in touch with our news team by emailing us at webnews@metro.co.uk.

For more stories like this, check our news page.

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Hushed voices and Haribo: What happened when I went to Crimestoppers HQ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/04/hushed-voices-and-haribo-what-happened-when-i-went-to-crimestoppers-hq-19770052/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/04/hushed-voices-and-haribo-what-happened-when-i-went-to-crimestoppers-hq-19770052/#respond Sat, 04 Nov 2023 00:01:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19770052
(for weekend) Crimestoppers visit Getty Images
From a secret location, call agents search for the ‘golden nugget’ of information that could solve a rape, murder or child abuse investigation (Picture: Getty Images)

Standing at the ticket barrier at a station in the south of England, my eyes dart around.

I only have the name of who I am meeting. I don’t know what they look like – or even where they are taking me.

It’s a meeting shrouded in secrecy, as Metro.co.uk has been granted exclusive access to Crimestoppers HQ to see what goes on behind the scenes of this 34-year-old organisation.

Being one of the last to shuffle through the barriers, my contact and I only recognise each other through our mutually expectant expressions. Next, I am guided to the charity’s base. How, I can’t say, but it’s a pretty nondescript building, which, again, is all I can say.

At the end of several corridors, a keypad allows access to the charity’s UK Contact Centre. Behind this door is a small army of call agents hearing first-hand about Britain’s criminal underworld.

It all may sound OTT but for good reason.

Appeal posters are scattered across the Crimestoppers headquarters as an ever-present reminder of the charity's work
Appeal posters are scattered across the Crimestoppers headquarters as an ever-present reminder of the charity’s work (Pictures: Kirsten Robertson)
Crimestoppers have helped to secure convictions for a series of high-profile cases, such as the murder of Julia James
Crimestoppers have offered rewards for a series of high-profile cases, such as the murder of Julia James

‘My boyfriend has a gun beneath his pillow.’

‘An attack is planned at a home with children, you need to stop it.’

‘I know a child abuser…’

These are all messages that have been made to Crimestoppers from concerned members of the public. However the charity also receive calls from criminals terrified of what will happen if they give the same information to the police.

Information might be ‘spat out’ before a call abruptly ends. Other times, a nervous voice tentatively goes into detail on the crime witnessed.

It’s important to keep call handlers safe given the nature of high-profile cases they work with – which range from gang violence to unsolved murders – and whythe location of Crimestoppers’ headquarters has to be top secret information.

Inside the safety of their walls, we meet call handler Diane. She sits beneath a pastel-coloured cloud which acts as a sound absorber – meaning she can her to focus on her own calls within the bustling office.

Diane’s bright pink nails – which match her bright pink hair – type away on a dayglo-lit keyboard as she finishes a report.

Diane works as a call agent within Crimestoppers UK contact centre - a job she wouldn't change for the world
Diane works as a call agent within Crimestoppers UK contact centre – a job she wouldn’t change for the world (Pictures: Kirsten Robertson)
While calls can be harrowing, there's an over-arching sense of community and purpose within the origination
While calls can be harrowing, there’s an over-arching sense of community and purpose within the team (Pictures: Kirsten Robertson)

BBC News plays on a nearby TV; today it’s the Covid Inquiry at the front of the news agenda. Packets of Haribo Starmix lay open on tables, providing a boost for those who are on the 5am early shift.

‘We look for the “golden nugget” of information after police appeals,’ Diane tells Metro.co.uk

‘It may be that someone rings up with a piece of info that was missing and it completes the jigsaw puzzle. We definitely aren’t a “snitch” line. It can be about anything – child abuse, bomb threats, drink driving, class A drugs, domestic abuse.

‘We’ve had calls from places like Northern Ireland, where there’s been threats to blow up a house. A caller might say “there’s children in the house, I just need you to know.” They’ve obviously got a heart somewhere as they’re thinking of the children.’

Phone numbers are scrambled when Diane picks up the phone. There’s no way of identifying the caller and conversations are not recorded, they’re noted down.

Anonymity is key. Crimestoppers agents aren’t the police, they don’t care who you are or how you know what you know. They just want the information.

Diane adds: ‘Sometimes people will blurt out what they want to say and then hang up. Probably, something intense has just happened like a drug deal gone wrong, and they’ve just jumped to call straight away.’

Cases are sensitive and calls and online forms anonymous – Crimestoppers staff really do work in the shadows.

The charity was founded by Michael Ashcroft – now Lord Ashcroft – following the death of PC Keith Blakelock during the 1985 London riots. Detectives said that someone knew who was responsible for the murder, but was afraid to come forward.

An anonymous hotline was soon launched and in the years since, 140,000 arrests have been as a result of Crimestoppers UK.

A financial incentive can also help boost appeals. This is made possible through donations from the public, foundations and other supporters. The money can help vulnerable people take the risk of sharing information and they can, potentially, even use it to escape a life of crime.

Earlier this year, a record reward was offered in Liverpool where gangs had fallen silent in the wake of Olivia Pratt-Korbel’s murder. A £200,000 reward – £100,000 was committed from Lord Ashcroft himself – and appeal helped change that. Thomas Cashman was jailed this year.

A record £200,000 reward was offered following the fatal shooting of Olivia Pratt-Korbel
A record £200,000 reward was offered following the fatal shooting of Olivia Pratt-Korbel
The nine-year-one was murdered after Thomas Cashman - who had burst into her home as he chased a rival drug dealer
The nine-year-one was murdered by Thomas Cashman – who had burst into her home as he chased a drug dealer

Highly publicised rewards from Crimestoppers were offered after the murder of Joanna Yates, the death of PCSO Julia James and the shooting of school-girl Thusha Kamaleswaran – among many other cases.

It’s not just money that drives callers, but their own moral compass. On average each year, only 1%-7% of financial rewards are actually claimed.

‘People want to do the right thing,’ Lou Peers tells Metro..co.uk.

She’s been at Crimestoppers for 18 years and risen through the ranks to become Head of Contact Centre Services.

She continues: ‘A caller might be someone in a gang or someone who has been in prison, we are a lifeline for people to unburden themselves safely.

‘There’s a number of things which set our call handlers apart from “normal” call centres. We don’t have scripts, for example. Agents are simply trained to get information from people by letting people speak uninterruptedly. If one call takes 45 minutes it takes 45 minutes. Some calls might take two minutes, but the agent is empowered to manage their call how they see fit.

Lou Peers maintains that everyone has a moral compass that urges them to do the right thing (Picture: Kirsten Robertson)
Lou Peers maintains that everyone has a moral compass that urges them to do the right thing (Picture: Kirsten Robertson)
Crimestoppers stand by their promise that any tip-off given will not be traced back to the caller Picture: Kirsten Robertson)
Crimestoppers stand by their promise that any tip-off given will not be traced back to the caller Picture: Kirsten Robertson)

‘The key question comes at the end, when agents ask “is there anything else?”

‘There is a moment of hesitation where you can almost hear cogs in their head turning. The most important information they give can sometimes be the last thing they say.’

Reports sent from Crimestoppers to the police are always tailored to ensure the caller cannot be identified.

If someone phones to say their next-door neighbour is burying something suspicious in the garden, Crimestoppers agents will take into account who else would have a view of the garden. Information is stripped out of reports if it could put the caller in danger.

On one occasion, a young woman got in touch about the fact her boyfriend slept with a firearm. When agents passed on the report to the police they said there was a gun in the house – but made no specific mention of the location.

This was to protect the woman as, if officers had made a beeline for the exact location after forcing entry, her boyfriend would know who had spoken out.

A renewed appeal was made this year following the unsolved murder of Lyn Bryant in Cornwall
A renewed appeal was made this year following the unsolved murder of Lyn Bryant in Cornwall
Berlin, 24 November 2021: Apple iPhone 13 Pro - High Tech Smartphone With Big Screen And Modern Design. Concept For Mobile Phone, Communication And Technology; Shutterstock ID 2081074822; purchase_order: -; job: -; client: -; other: -
Calls cannot be traced and numbers do not appear when you call Crimestoppers (Picture: Shutterstock/Gabo_Arts)

And it’s not only calls, Crimestoppers staff pore through thousands of online forms. Since introducing it’s website in 2005, it has been constantly updated to make things as easy as possible for people reporting crime.

Don’t know the specific address of somewhere? Don’t worry, you can describe it. There’s even an option to list a What3Words phrase to narrow down the area.

Computer IP addresses are never traced so there’s no way of knowing who sent the form.

Once information is passed onto the police, Crimestoppers often only find out the outcome if the case reaches the press or through police feedback.

For Diane – who used to work in finance and childcare – and Lou – who studied Egyptology at university – they never expected to have a job fighting crime.

But now, they can’t imagine anything different.

‘Every time you pick up that phone – it’s an incredibly different call,’ says Diane. ‘People trust us and talk to us like we’re friends. We get information that police couldn’t possibly get.

‘Sometimes people call and admit they are very scared. I tell them I can’t see their phone number and how we’re not recording the call. We only report the crime, this has nothing to do with you.’

Lou, talking to Metro on the 18th anniversary of her Crimestoppers career – adds: ‘The charity always evolves. In the pandemic we worked with the Home Office to set up the Covid Fraud Hotline. We also have our Most Wanted appeals.

‘Even 18 years on, the work we do here still captures my attention and imagination. The team is amazing and I want us to keep providing the service which we do. People here are genuinely proud of what we do.

‘During the pandemic I helped by taking calls again. After each one, I was reminded “this is why we do this. We are absolutely helping people and communities on a daily basis.”’

Crimestoppers operates the 0800 555 111 telephone number, allowing people to call anonymously to pass on information about crime. People can also give information anonymously via an anonymous online form on the Crimestoppers website. Callers are not required to give their name or any personal information.

Crimestoppers is an independent charity and not aligned with the police. Find out more by clicking here.

Most Wanted

The Crimestoppers Most Wanted gallery exposes those wanted by UK law enforcement. Launched in 2005, it has been highly successful, with more than 5,000 arrests to date.

You can search by UK region, keyword or crime type, and give information to help identify, locate and arrest offenders. Contact Crimestoppers anonymously and securely on 0800 555 111 or through their online form.

It’s not just the UK, Most Wanted appeals have helped track down criminals across Europe.  Spain is one of the most popular countries for British ex-pats – and can be a common hideaway for criminals.  

Joshua Hendry, 30, was caught by an off-duty Spanish police officer in Marbella in 2022 as he walked his dog.

The alleged drug trafficker from Merseyside was arrested within a day of Crimestoppers and the National Crime Agency naming him as one of Britain’s most wanted fugitives.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

READ MORE: Appeal offers £20,000 reward for help finding remains of man who vanished in 1988

READ MORE: Reward to find arrogant BMW driver who hit mum and pram on wrong side of road

READ MORE: £10,000 reward in new appeal on 25-year anniversary of girl’s disappearance

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‘My first mammogram put me off ever getting another, here’s what changed my mind’ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/03/my-first-mammogram-put-me-off-going-again-heres-what-changed-19763564/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/03/my-first-mammogram-put-me-off-going-again-heres-what-changed-19763564/#respond Fri, 03 Nov 2023 09:21:05 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19763564
Mammograms used to be feared due to a painful 'squashing' sensation caused by the bulky old kit
Mammograms used to be feared due to a painful ‘squashing’ sensation caused by the bulky old kit

Stephanie O’Brien grimaces recalling her first ever mammogram. 

It had taken place in the early eighties after she found a lump, which thankfully turned out to be nothing of concern. During the procedure, a cold and uncomfortable machine was used to ‘squash’ her breast, down like a vice.

Mammograms had only become the norm a decade or so before after a ground-breaking 1966 study highlighted their impact. The research vindicated health care professionals who had long campaigned for them to be used.

While the study was a big step for improving women’s healthcare, the mammogram machine it inspired looked very different to what we know today.

The technology took a lot of skill to operate and was said to be the size of ‘a full-grown bull.’

Such was the discomfort and pain of her first mammogram, Stephanie decided against attending another for decades – even when the letters inviting her for one started to appear through her letterbox once she’d turned 50.

MAY 12 1974 Mrs. Shirley Peterson, director of School of Radiologic Technology, uses the new machine for mammogram. Cedit: Denver Post (Denver Post via Getty Images)
Shirley Peterson uses a new mammogram machine in Denver, America on May 12, 1974 (Picture: Denver Post via Getty Images)

Speaking on Metro’s podcast Dawn Butler Mammograms and Me, she recalled: ‘I’d had one in what I call “the bad old days” when the procedure really was quite painful. 

‘The mammogram then was horrible, the machine was like old fashioned mangles your granny would use to do the washing. You’d put your breasts in the machine and it was really uncomfortable. 

‘The whole thing put me off ever getting another. Plus, there was no cancer in my family so I just didn’t think a diagnosis would happen to me.’

Stephanie only changed her mind about mammograms after she read about the #FindtheMissingMillion campaign.

Launched by Dawn Butler and Metro.co.uk last year, it highlighted how a million women in the UK are thought to have missed their most recent mammogram screenings due to lockdown and the pandemic.

Thousands more could be living with breast cancer without realising.

Stephanie O'Brien sat down with Dawn Butler MP during the latest episode of Mammograms and Me (Picture: Stephanie O'Brien)
Stephanie O’Brien sat down with Dawn Butler MP during the latest episode of Mammograms and Me (Picture: Stephanie O’Brien)

Stephanie, until reading about the #FindTheMissingMillion campaign, was one of them.

‘I read your story and something clicked,’ she told Dawn on the podcast.

‘I’m 65 now and I was 64 when I read about the campaign. It occurred to me that I hadn’t had a mammogram in decades.’

Stephanie got her mammogram in a portacabin within the carpark of Tesco Extra in Neasden, London. 

The mobile units target women who often feel ‘too busy’ to make time for their health. 

For Stephanie, who had been nervous about the procedure, she was left shocked at how much mammograms had changed. 

Unspecified - 1977: Woman getting a mammogram, appearing in the ABC tv series 'ABC News Closeup', episode, 'Women's Health: A Question of Survival'. (Photo by Ann Limongello /American Broadcasting Companies via Getty Images)
A woman getting a mammogram appearing in ABC’s ‘Women’s Health: A Question of Survival’ in 1977 (Picture: Ann Limongello /American Broadcasting Companies/Getty Images)

‘It was remarkably unpainful, I was expecting a feeling of being squashed. But it was nothing like the one I’d had in the seventies,’she admitted. ‘It took about ten minutes, it was really easy and straightforward.’

Several weeks later Stephanie found herself in a clinic in Edgware, discussing the fact she may have cancer. A biopsy was taken and Stephanie soon found out she had the ‘Big C’. But she tells Dawn she wasn’t scared.

‘My husband was worried, more so than me. But I wasn’t frightened,’ she explained.

‘The thinking around cancer 50 years ago was very different to what we know today. Cancer used to be seen as a death sentence, it was the ’Big C’ and meant you were going to die. 

‘These days I knew – after working for the NHS in a general hospital and on an oncology ward –  that this was no longer the case. I didn’t feel that kind of cancer experience was going to happen to me.

‘But once I knew the cancer was there in my breast, I wanted it out. A squatter was not welcome in my breast. I wanted eviction day to come.’

During the podcast, Stephanie and Dawn also delve into the current state of the NHS and the mammoth efforts of healthcare workers during the Covid-19 pandemic. 

Looking to the future, Stephanie hopes cancer treatment can become easier for staff and patients alike.

She continued: ‘I would like it to be a routine question for GPs to put to women. They could say “have you had a mammogram?”

‘We need to remember that lots of older women are not internet savvy, so can’t access everything online. There needs to be options for them and make it accessible. 

‘Mobile units – like I used to get my mammogram – are brilliant and we need to have more of that.

Dawn Butler is on a mission to #FindTheMissingMillion (Picture: Natasha Psenicki)
Dawn Butler, Labour MP for Brent, is on a mission to #FindTheMissingMillion (Picture: Natasha Psenicki)

‘We also need to go into “ignored” communities to publicise mammograms. 

‘Maybe we need to put a mobile unit down the Church Road in Brent [a deprived community with a large Caribbean and newer Somali population, within Dawn Butler’s ward where Stephanie also lives.]

‘There’s a lot of people around there and if we put a mobile unit or information there, especially in languages such as Farsi or Somali, then people can find out more about mammograms.

‘If caught early, cancer doesn’t need to be a desperately awful experience.’

Stephanie’s episode marks the final in the Mammograms and Me series. We’ve heard from Coronation Street star Victoria Ekanoye, TV star Dr Nighat Arif, a panel of breast cancer experts, charity boss Isola Blair and former surgeon Liz O’Riordan. You can catch-up on all the episodes by clicking here.

A Million Missed Mammograms

After being diagnosed with breast cancer during a routine mammogram in November, Dawn Butler MP was grateful to find out it was caught early.

However, she learned that a million women missed out on their mammograms due to the pandemic, with an estimated 10,000 currently living with undetected breast cancer.

Determined to change that, Dawn has launched a campaign with Metro.co.uk to get a million women to book their missed screenings.

If you have been inspired to do so after hearing Dawn's story, please let her know on her website, emailing us or using #FindTheMillion on social media.

READ MORE: Breast cancer timebomb: Why we need to find the million women who have missed their mammograms

READ MORE: ‘We are not listened to’: Why Black women are twice as likely to be diagnosed with late-stage cancer

READ MORE: ‘AI is coming’ how breast cancer doctors are preparing for a virtual helping hand

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

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We’re rationing our ADHD medication due to shortages — this is the impact https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/03/were-rationing-adhd-medication-due-to-shortages-this-is-the-impact-19757030/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/03/were-rationing-adhd-medication-due-to-shortages-this-is-the-impact-19757030/#respond Fri, 03 Nov 2023 08:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19757030
The shortages are predicted to last until at least December (Picture: Getty/Metro.co.uk)
The shortages are predicted to last until at least December (Picture: Getty/Metro.co.uk)

Having received his medication by post for several years, Jamie Johnston’s monthly deliveries stopped without warning five weeks ago.

The 33-year-old, who runs neurodivergent-friendly dating app Mattr, had seen rumblings on social media about a shortage of ADHD medication, so went to his local pharmacy in Hackney to work out what was going on.

Not only was he unable to get his Elvanse prescription filed in person, Jamie was then sent a fine letter claiming he had an incorrect prepayment certificate, before being offered worrying guidance from his GP that put his health at risk.

‘I was advised by the doctor to add my remaining pills to a glass of water and sip periodically to eke out the dosage,’ he told Metro.co.uk.

‘This led to a dangerous situation a couple of weeks ago where, half asleep, I drank the water by my bedside in the night, forgetting it had my medication in it.’

Jamie was ‘stunned’ over the ‘lack of communication’ he experienced and the controversial advice he was given, particularly since he could see a spike in blood pressure through this form of rationing.

‘They have no idea what’s going on,’ he added. ‘I keep being told to ask the GP for an alternative medication, but even this is unresponsive as I think they are also running out now too.’

Jamie Johnson, 33, who has been affected by the ADHD medication shortage
Jamie was ‘stunned’ by the advice he received (Picture: Supplied)

Jamie is one of the 200,000 people in England receiving a prescription for ADHD medication, many of which have been out of stock since September.

Methylphenidate (licensed under the brand names Equasym, Xaggitin, Concerta, and Xenidate), lisdexamfetamine (Elvanse), atomoxetine (Strattera), and guanfacine (Intuniv) are in short supply due to ‘manufacturing issues and an increased global demand,’ according to an NHS advisory.

Prescribers have also been advised not to start new patients on medications affected by the shortages until supply issues have been resolved, which may not be until December or later.

After being diagnosed with combined type ADHD in 2020, the 60mg Elvanse capsule I take every working day has been a lifeline. Years of struggling to prioritise, making silly mistakes and my brain (and mouth) going a mile a minute gave way to a more comfortable pace; I’m not perfect by any means, but I no longer break down at my desk or act before thinking in the way I did before.

As a result of the shortage, I’ve spent hours calling round pharmacies in the hope they’ve got stock available and jumped through hoops to have a minor prescription change (three 20mg pills daily compared to one 60mg) approved by my doctor.

My pharmacist has been a huge help, but there’s a sense of irony in a group defined by poor organisational skills and forgetfulness having to keep on top of such a large amount of life admin.

Writer Jessica Lindsay has been personally impacted by the shortages (Picture: Supplied)
Writer Jessica Lindsay has been personally impacted by the shortages (Picture: Supplied)

Joanna Nadin, a novelist and university professor from Bath, has been doing her best to help her daughter Millie Edwards, 20, get the help she needs.

Millie, who was diagnosed with ADHD at 17 and takes 40mg Elvanse daily, is studying at the London College of Fashion, but can’t register for a GP in Mile End where she lives without jeopardising her place on the waiting list for support.

Joanna says her daughter ‘phoned in a panic after Boots told her they couldn’t get her meds indefinitely because of a national shortage. This was a month after the National Patient Safety Alert went out’.

Although this alert recommends GPs contact patients who may be affected, Millie received no such communication. She demanded advice and eventually received a response, but was left in ‘immense amounts of stress’ over the inadequate solutions proposed.

Joanna Nadin and her daughter Millie Edwards, who has been affected by the ADHD medication shortage
Millie has had to rely on her mum for support throughout the crisis (Picture: Supplied)

Millie told Metro.co.uk: ‘They told me to take one-to-two-day medication breaks where possible (which isn’t an option for me as I’m in the middle of university coursework submission), to see if there’s a lower dose available (there isn’t) or to switch to a new medication entirely (there is currently none available).’

The pair called dozens of pharmacies in London and Bath and found one of the few remaining bottles in stock, but this runs out in three weeks, meaning they may have to go through the same exhausting process all over again.

‘For someone with ADHD and a job or university, this is an almost impossible task even on meds,’ said Joanna. ‘Imagine trying to do this when they’ve run out.’ 

Amid the confusion of the last few weeks, the mum has heard of others relying on caffeine tablets to get by, buying dexamfetamine on the black market, or using old stock from friends who’ve changed medication and trying to titrate it themselves.

Tabby Farrar, 32, was diagnosed with combined type ADHD in 2022 and is seeing similar stories play out an Employee Resource Group she runs at work for other neurodivergent people.

She told Metro.co.uk: ‘Colleagues right now are telling me they are waiting to start titration months after diagnosis because there are no meds to trial them on, one person who has completed titration and been confirmed for a prescription can’t now get it issued and is having to go cold turkey and deal with withdrawal symptoms (depression being a key one) and another on the same medication as I am has admitted to only taking her medication on work days because she’s trying to make the packs last longer – leading to emotional turbulence and nausea every weekend.’

Getting hold of her own Elvanse prescription has been fraught with complications since September, but this month Tabby had the script returned by the pharmacist, who told her not to expect anything until the New Year.

Tabby Farrar, 32, who has been affected by the ADHD medication shortage
Tabby’s neurodivergent colleagues have resorted to desperate measures to get by (Picture: Supplied)

In the interim, the content and digital PR consultant and wellbeing blogger has spent a considerable amount on an ADHD coach to help her manage symptoms. She is hoping the Access to Work grant she applied for months ago will cover the cost, yet warns that long wait times may prevent this being an option for others and laments the lack of assistance available.

‘I’ve had my medication stopped unexpectedly with no alternative support put in place via the NHS and no signposting to alternative services offered,’ said Tabby.

‘After getting diagnosed late in life and finding prescribed treatment totally life-changing, it’s pretty miserable being sent back to square one. Like a “that was what you could have had… but now it’s back to the preventable struggling instead”.’

An absence of guidance and support from the NHS has been an ongoing issue in the ADHD community, something brought into sharp focus by the current situation.

Henry Shelford, the CEO and a co-founder of ADHD UK, said: ‘ADHD is a disability and the sudden removal of medication is akin to removing a wheelchair from a disabled person that needs it. The NHS should have realised that this was happening and had a plan in place.

‘Instead, people are only finding out when their pharmacy can’t supply. They’ve been left stranded with no support. It is an abject failure, but sadly this lack of care is something we’ve come to expect with our stigmatised condition.’

Recent coverage around ADHD suggesting it’s overdiagnosed (despite evidence proving the opposite), ‘fashionable’, or merely an ‘illness identity’ has impacted the public’s perception, but the are numerous personal and societal ramifications that come with dismissing what people with the disorder go through.

Adults with ADHD are five times more likely to try to take their own life than those without, while the World Journal of Biological Psychiatry found that young people with undiagnosed or untreated ADHD are more likely to end up in prison.

When you’ve been shamed as ‘odd’, ‘lazy’, ‘loud’, or ‘scatty’ your whole life, spent years waiting for a diagnosis, then been told the only treatment offered via the NHS is no longer accessible, is it any wonder you’d feel let down?

What to do if you're affected by the shortage

Dr Hana Patel, NHS GP and GP Medico-Legal expert witness told Metro.co.uk she has patients call her daily to discuss issues around ADHD, something ‘causing a lot of stress, worsening of mental health problems and needing consultations with their GP.’

She said: ‘I would advise people to please not share their medication with anyone else.

‘If a patient’s mental health needs are very complex, for example they also have mental health problems, or their ADHD symptoms causes them severe difficulty, they can discuss this with their GP, who may recommend a specialist consultant review. ’

According to Dr Hana, NICE guidelines recommend having regular treatment breaks from ADHD medications, so this could be a solution to preserve the amount you have left.

‘It is not unusual to stop taking medication over the weekend or during school holidays,’ she adds. ‘Therefore, no harm should come from stopping the medication, but this should be done in a planned way.’

In addition to this, she says the general tips given by the NHS on managing symptoms may be of use.

These include planning your day, setting clear boundaries, being aware of upcoming social situation, and carrying out regular exercise.

The moderation team for the ADHDUK Reddit page, where people seek advice from peers and share their experiences, say they’ve seen a wide range of knock-on effects among members.

A statement from them provided to Metro.co.uk read: ‘People often say in our community that due to the shortages, they feel as though they’re “losing who they are” and that they’re “scared to go back to how things were”.

‘It is heartbreaking, and we have seen a shocking increase in the number of posts talking about or mentioning suicide as a result. What we’re seeing is a situation where many people who were doing “okay” before the shortages are now being pushed to unexpected and catastrophic breaking points.’

They believe the language used by agencies claiming the stock issues are down to ‘increased global demand’ blames people with ADHD, an attitude which ‘directly filters down into people’s GPs and mental health teams, impacting the care our community receives as a result.’

Alongside negative perceptions surrounding ADHD, the mod team have spoken to members who were misinformed over the safety of tapering medications like guanfacine, which, when halted abruptly can trigger rebound hypertension or even result in death.

Others have resorted to ‘predatory services that take advantage of people’s desperation’, forking out large sums for limited or incorrect advice.

That’s why it’s so important not just to keep fighting for the treatment you deserve but to lean on the support of fellow ADHDers dealing with the same thing. As well as sense-checking the validity of information, these communities can show you you’re not alone in your frustration.

‘We will get through this,’ added Millie, who says the situation has been a ‘nightmare’. ‘Just stay strong.’

What does the NHS and Department of Health say?

In a statement given to Metro.co.uk addressing the ADHD medication shortage, a Department of Health and Social Care spokesperson said: ‘We understand medicine shortages can be distressing but we want to reassure patients we are working intensively with manufacturers to increase supply for the UK and ensure continuous access to ADHD medicines for those who need them.

‘Some of these supply issues have now been resolved, but we know issues remain with others. These are expected to be resolved by the end of the year.

‘We have issued communications to the NHS to advise healthcare professionals on how to minimise disruption for patients and keep them informed amid these supply issues. Patients are advised to speak to their clinician regarding any concerns as they are best placed to discuss how they might be affected and the suitability of treatment with alternative medicines.’

Metro has also contacted NHS England and will update this article if we receive a response.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

MORE : ADHD linked to depression and suicidal thoughts

MORE : ‘ADHD affects black women – it’s time our stories were told’

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Metro.co.uk’s cost of living campaign wins prestigious award https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/03/metro-co-uks-cost-of-living-campaign-wins-prestigious-award-19763895/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/03/metro-co-uks-cost-of-living-campaign-wins-prestigious-award-19763895/#respond Fri, 03 Nov 2023 06:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19763895
Mum feeding baby back drop of metro articles about formula for change
The Formula For Change campaign has won the prestigious Making A Difference Award (Picture: Getty/Metro.co.uk)

Metro.co.uk’s Formula For Change campaign has won an award for outstanding efforts in driving change – and it’s all thanks to you.

The campaign, in partnership with family support charity Feed, beat other national media outlets to be given the prestigious Making A Difference award, which was voted for by the public.

Since its launch earlier this year, Formula For Change has been calling on the government to overturn outdated guidelines on how baby formula can be bought.

Our petition has already hit almost 50,000 signatures, while we’ve also received backing from well-known names such as Katherine Ryan, Kelsey Parker, Michelle Heaton and Ashley James, alongside MP Preet Gill and MSP Monica Lennon.

Such is the power of our cost of living campaign, in August supermarket giant Iceland join forces with Metro.co.uk and Feed, prompting CEO Richard Walker to flout government guidelines to sell cut-price formula.

Just last week, Labour announced their support of the campaign, with Shadow health secretary Wes Streeting telling Metro.co.uk: ‘Regulations that prevent families from using foodbank vouchers to buy infant formula are no longer fit for purpose.’

shadow secretary of state for health and social care Wes Streeting
The campaign has been backed by Labour and the shadow secretary of state for health and social care Wes Streeting (Picture: (Picutre: James McCauley/Shutterstock)
Formula For Change has received backing from a whole host of well known faces (Picture: Shutterstock/Getty)
Formula For Change has received backing from a whole host of well known faces (Picture: Shutterstock/Getty)

Talking about the win, Metro.co.uk Deputy Editor Claie Wilson, who has spearheaded the campaign with journalist Kat Romero and Feed’s Erin Williams, said: ‘This is a huge accolade and just shows how important our campaign is.

‘Families are struggling and the government is making life unnecessarily harder for them than it needs to be – so if Metro.co.uk can help change that, we will.

‘I’m really proud of all we’ve achieved so far, but there’s still work to be done – so please sign our petition and let’s take it to No.10 and show how much this issue matters.’

METRO GRAPHICS Formula For Change supermarket loyalty points chart - NEW LOGO
The guidelines means shoppers are limited with what they can spend their supermarket loyalty points on (Picture: Metro.co.uk/Getty)

The Making A Difference Award is part of the Journalism Matters campaign by the News Media Association and aims to emphasise the crucial role played by journalism in our society. The public were encouraged to view the local and national shortlists of campaigns and vote for their favourite entries.

While Metro.co.uk’s Formula For Change campaign won the national media category, the Inverness Courier’s ‘Dual the A9’ won the local media campaign.

NMA chief executive Owen Meredith said: “I would like to extend my warmest congratulations to The Metro.co.uk and The Inverness Courier for winning the prestigious 2023 Making a Difference award in the national and local categories. The entries this year have showcased the outstanding work carried out by UK journalists, day in, day out.’

FORMULA FOR CHANGE: HOW YOU CAN HELP

Join Metro.co.uk and Feed in calling on the government to urgently review their infant formula legislation and give retailers the green light to accept loyalty points, all food bank vouchers and store gift cards as payment for infant formula.

Our aim is to take our petition to No.10 to show the Prime Minister this is an issue that can no longer be ignored.

The more signatures we get, the louder our voice, so please click here to sign our Formula for Change petition.

Things need to change NOW.

MORE : ‘Even with both parents in work, some families can’t afford the basics – they are fighting to survive right now’

MORE : Outcry as formula shortage hits baby banks leaving struggling families to swap milk for water and skip meals to make ends meet

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Birthing expert shares what every new mum should know about sex  https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/01/birthing-expert-shares-what-every-new-mum-should-know-about-sex-19751052/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/01/birthing-expert-shares-what-every-new-mum-should-know-about-sex-19751052/#respond Wed, 01 Nov 2023 07:30:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19751052
Many women struggle to fall back in love with their body after giving birth (Picture: Getty Images)
Many women struggle to fall back in love with their body after giving birth (Picture: Getty Images/Ella Millward)

There’s still a huge taboo surrounding the sex-lives of women after childbirth. 

While there’s advice and tips for getting back into the saddle after having a baby, the fact that women are forced to suddenly reconnect with their body after its biggest change to date, is often overlooked.

With social media feeds full of new mums bouncing back after birth, many others feel under pressure to get back to their pre-baby life.

However, according to birthing coach turned sex worker Gem Kocher, that’s simply not possible. 

The non binary 30-year-old spent years as a doula – a job which involves offering support and guidance to new parents – and says it’s time we got real about sex after childbirth is really like for most people.

Speaking to Miranda Kane on the latest episode of Metro’s sex podcast Smut Drop, Gem explains: ‘It’s important to make space and room for your new self as soon as you can after having a baby. People have come to me ten years after giving birth to say they’re still processing their relationship with their body.

‘For example, you may have scarring from after giving birth. Lots of people have trouble touching their genitals or scars after a birth experience. It can be triggering.

‘So in this case, the first step I’d take is to gently gaze at your genitals or your scar in the mirror. Tell yourself quietly what you see and what’s different. Gently get to know your body again. You can say what you see out loud or write it in a journal.’

Pregnant woman
Swelling, change in vulva shape and pain can all be experienced for women during sex after giving birth (Picture: Shutterstock / Emituu)

Following birth, most women experience bleeding and feeling bruised, which can last anywhere from two to eight weeks following delivery, while some have painful tearing or sutures from an episiotomy.

What’s more, unpredictable hormones can make a vagina more dry than usual. Even with lube, Gem says it’s normal for new mums to find penetrative sex painful in the weeks or months after giving birth.

‘There’s often a weird narrative about getting your body ‘back’ in that you should return to your previous self before you had a baby. For most people that won’t happen. We are always moving forward.

Gem says women have been left struggling for answers to improve sex after childbirth
Gem says women have been left struggling for answers to improve sex after childbirth

‘Go at your own pace. Hold your vulva or any scars and give your body a message of compassion and tenderness. Maybe a week or so after you can try massaging the area or using oils.’

Gem, who grew up in rural Wisconsin, discusses the various taboos still facing new mums on this week’s Smut Drop. They tell Miranda about their work as a doula results in a sexual ‘high’ after childbirth.

Gem, who also now works as a pleasure coach, admits to being on the ‘kinky side’, and explains: ‘I freaking adore birth. I could be around it all day. 

‘In general I find birth super erotic, delightful, delicious and sensual. I will come home from a lot of my births on a high. I’ll call my ex-girlfriend and be like “hey, where are you? Want to come round?”’

Miranda and Gem also delve into the ‘desexulaisation’ of mothers. While dad-bods are celebrated and men who give up their jobs to care for a child heralded, it’s a different story for women.

They may reach ‘MILF’ status, but that’s only after their role as a care-giver is perceived to be done, once their sons or daughters reach teenage years. 

Gem adds: ‘There’s this whole desexualistaion of mothers. Dads are supposed to have a ‘dad bod’ and you’re supposed to be attracted to them in this hetero culture. There’s an idea that having a fatherly role makes them a more sexualised figure.

‘Whereas you don’t have the same expectations of new mothers. People don’t look at a new mum and think ‘ooh, how sexy’. Why not?!’

Smut Drop

Smut Drop is a weekly podcast with host Miranda Kane from Metro.co.uk, touching on sex, dating and relationships.

With no holds barred, it’s the home of sex positive chat, where Miranda will be joined each week by sexperts and special guests to explore the world of the erotic.

And we want to hear from you, too! As part of our podcast we’ll be sharing listeners’ experiences, thoughts and questions on a different theme every week.

So if you want to be involved in something brilliant – either anonymously or using your bold and beautiful name – drop us an email to smutdrop@metro.co.uk or slide into our DMs on Twitter @smutdrop.

With new episodes dropping every Wednesday, you can download Smut Drop from all your usual places.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

READ MORE: Mum shares her struggle to have sex after childbirth left her vagina ‘broken’

READ MORE: 8 things nobody tells you about sex after you’ve had a baby

READ MORE: New mum praised for raw account of the first 72 hours after birth

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‘Cutting hair on the street gave me the family I never knew I needed’ https://metro.co.uk/2023/10/31/i-cut-hair-on-the-streets-for-free-and-put-on-festivals-for-homeless-19703725/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/10/31/i-cut-hair-on-the-streets-for-free-and-put-on-festivals-for-homeless-19703725/#respond Tue, 31 Oct 2023 10:56:57 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19703725
The barber cuts the hair of the homeless outside of Angel Station and you might have spotted him dancing with travellers near the Underground (Picture: Mojo Stewart)
The barber cuts the hair of the homeless outside of Angel Station and you might have spotted him dancing with travelers near the Underground (Picture: Mojo Stewart)

Mojo Stewart doesn’t call himself a barber – but you might spot him around London cutting people’s hair and having a little boogie with commuters. 

For two and a half days a week, he helps out food banks, gives people free haircuts, and entertains anyone who needs their day brightening.

It all started in April 2018, when Mojo hit a rough patch.

‘I was in a low place when I started doing the haircuts, so working wasn’t really an issue.

‘I didn’t want to work, what I wanted to do was something to make myself happy.

‘Doing this made me happy,’ he tells Metro.co.uk. 

The barber never charges a penny for his work, and his clientele varies. Sometimes it’s homeless people, but other times it is refugees, people waiting in the queue at a foodbank and children. 

He will cut children’s hair as long as their parents bring them along. ‘After the pandemic, I was amazed at how many kids were getting their hair done,’ he says.

Mojo Stewart doing what he does best outside Angel Station (Picture: Mojo Stewart)
Mojo Stewart doing what he does best outside Angel Station (Picture: Mojo Stewart)

Yet as he says on his Instagram page, it’s not just about hair – there’s a mental health aspect to it too. 

Four years ago, a woman brought over her partially blind husband to him for a haircut. 

‘The man was very quiet, very soft-spoken. He seemed to want to help me,

‘He brought down a razor – one of those free ones – so that I could help do other people’s faces with it.

‘I couldn’t use it, but it was just a thought that he had these ideas which made him a helpful person,’ Mojo recalls.

Every two weeks, the man would visit him for a haircut, but this time, without his wife. He couldn’t speak English very well, but they communicated through hand gestures. 

After a while, he was a different person. The old man began to smile and opened up to his new friend. Yet one day, he stopped coming. 

Then his wife – who he affectionately calls auntie Sharma – went to see him.

‘She said: “Mojo, you don’t remember me. I brought my husband down.” And that’s how we got our connection.’ 

She told him that her husband had died. 

Auntie Sharma would visit him on the street, and for the first three months they mainly spoke about the loss of her husband.

‘His wife said that he was very intelligent. He was an accountant before he went blind,’ the entertainer says.

Then over time, auntie Sharma – a small but chatty 77-year-old – and Mojo would pop to McDonald’s and chat about everything. There’s still sadness in her, but now she jokes a lot.

‘She’s with me on the street, we’re out there in public, but she can sit down, knowing that it’s like a safe space,’ he says.

‘We are a street family.’

To Mojo, it's not just about hair (Picture: Mojo Stewart)
To Mojo, it’s not just about hair (Picture: Mojo Stewart)

During his hair-cutting sessions, you’ll always hear music. He got his love of dancing from being raised in a care home. 

‘The first time I felt that I was able to express myself was when I was about four years old,’ he says. 

A band wearing costumes came in to play drums for the kids.

‘As soon as I saw it, I just felt so alive,’ he recalls.

Four-year-old Mojo quickly ran into the bathroom and shaped a towel to look like their costumes, and danced along with them. 

‘I’m not a dancer, but it’s my happy place,’ he says. He shares his happy place with everyone – each year, he creates a dance that other people can do with him. 

One day in between the dancing, Mojo says he was cutting a man’s hair: ‘He said to me, “You know what Mojo, you make people feel valued.” 

‘And it was after he said that, to me, that’s when I came up with the idea – I would love to put on an event to show you how valued you are. 

‘But I’m just a person, I’m just me.’

From that day on, the idea of a Groove Groom Grub festival blossomed. Lush gave him £500, with which he bought some food, sleeping bags and rucksacks. He also received some soap from the store, which he put in the goodie bags.

He didn’t advertise his event, he just told the people he was helping so other people who didn’t need help wouldn’t know about it. He hosted the first festival on July 19 2023, and the second on August 23 2023.

He hires the homeless to run the festival, too – £10 an hour for a DJ, and for someone else to keep the area clean. Up to 20 people turned up for his first event.

Thanks to his close relationship with the community, he’s now created a system where people find themselves coming back again and again.  

‘I’m really amazed that people come back to me,’ Mojo says. ‘It’s like, wow, you came back even though you know I’m not a barber, right?’

It may be because he cares for people – which is something he says he didn’t receive as a child.

His biological mum told him that she put him in care at two months old, he recalls.

‘It’s almost like you don’t have a family,’ he says.

‘You don’t have somewhere where you can put your stuff down and know that it’s going to be there. I certainly understood the idea of being homeless.’

Throughout his childhood, he always sought out his family. He adds: ‘I didn’t realise that at the time my family didn’t want me. When I understood that, I must’ve been about 17.

‘I used to think to myself, well, it couldn’t be so difficult to just care. It doesn’t cost anything at all.  

‘People don’t come to be expecting to get their handout, necessarily, but they do expect to be heard, or to be listened to.

‘All I can give is what I would have liked.’

Get in touch with our news team by emailing us at webnews@metro.co.uk.

For more stories like this, check our news page.

MORE : ‘We’ve given 50,000 free haircuts to the homeless – everyone deserves a self-esteem boost’

MORE : ‘For Black women, salons offer so much more than new hair’

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Ex-gangster reveals what life was like on the notorious ‘Dodge Estate’ https://metro.co.uk/2023/10/31/liverpool-when-id-beat-people-up-i-just-saw-it-as-work-19731466/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/10/31/liverpool-when-id-beat-people-up-i-just-saw-it-as-work-19731466/#respond Tue, 31 Oct 2023 07:30:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19731466
Stu Otten grew up in Liverpool when the city was in the grips of a heroin crisis (Picture: Causeway, Myles Goode)
Stu Otten grew up in Liverpool when the city was in the grips of a heroin crisis (Picture: Causeway, Myles Goode)

For years Stu Otten was trapped within a gang.

Whenever he was sent to rival gang members and ‘teach them a lesson’, he would even referred to the outings as ‘meetings’. 

In the morning, one of his meetings might take him to Glasgow, where he’d force his way through the front door. By the afternoon, his next appointment could be at a home in Liverpool, armed with a hammer as he prepared to collect an unpaid debt.

Stu had been raised on the infamous Netherton Estate, six miles from Liverpool’s city centre. Known as ‘Dodge City’, it was where criminals would flee to escape the authorities.

‘It was the only place police wouldn’t come to in the area, it was that rough’, Stu tells Metro. ‘It had a big reputation. I remember walking through the estate with my mum and asking her why there were zombies everywhere.’

The ‘zombies’ Stu saw were addicts; Merseyside in the 1980s had been in the midst of a heroin epidemic. The drug was cheap and gained popularity at a time when unemployment had skyrocketed to 20% of Liverpool’s population. 

‘I remember going into my friend’s flat on the estate’, Stu recalls. ‘I saw a needle on the floor and had no idea what it was. I was five then and I’m 46 now, but still remember it like it was yesterday.’

October 30 embargo - Liverpool drug dealer interview Picture: Stu Otten - Causeway
Stu, pictured here aged 6, was badly bullied as he grew up in ‘Dodge City’ (Picture: Causeway)

Stu, the youngest of three, grew up within a loving and hardworking family. But he struggled with self-confidence and was ruthlessly bullied by other boys on the estate. By the time he was 12 he was suffering from deep distress, trauma, mental health problems, and uncontrollable anger. 

Determined to fit in with the crowd with a ‘hardman’ act, he never told his parents about the bullying. Instead, Stu joined a local kick-boxing club which, ultimately, became his path to further destruction.

There, the teenager met older boys who had designer clothes, expensive watches and fast cars. Still feeling isolated from the bullying, Stu decided he wanted to be just like them.

One of the men got Stu, then 17, to work as a doorman around the pubs and clubs of Liverpool. But this didn’t just involve door work – the ‘opportunity’ led to a dark criminal underworld.

‘We lived by the docks in Liverpool, right next to a huge warehouse that stored alcohol,’ remembers Stu. ‘We’d steal the booze and sell it on before moving onto drugs. I got a buzz from the fact I felt I belonged. 

‘These guys were like my family and had my back no matter what. It made me understand why soldiers die for each other. 

‘It was only years later I realised how harmful the gang had been. But I couldn’t have left them, they’d just have sucked me back in.’

The gang routinely dealt cocaine, ecstasy and cannabis, and Stu’s specific job was forced to reach people about an unpaid debt or had angered a gang member.

He kept knives and hammers in his house for protection, and a machete under his bed.

‘By 18 I had been to cities across the UK for these guys. I learned how to use a knife,’ admits Stu. ‘I could kick a door in cleanly and make a quick getaway. I wasn’t the biggest or the toughest but I had no “off” switch, I’d do what they needed from me.

‘When I’d beat people up, I just saw it as work. I’d say to myself, “I’ll finish this meeting then it’s onto the next meeting.” It’s just what my life was like.

‘You hear a lot about County Lines now, it isn’t new. I was involved in County Lines 25 years ago before it had a name. I was recruited to the gang when I was 18 and had no idea what I was doing. I took drugs to people and the violence followed.’

Things intensified for Stu in the years that followed as other criminals and police were on his back. He found himself released from custody and fearing for his life from others, thinking one wrong move could result in his murder.

A crowd of youths standing on a street corner before rioting started in the Toxteth area of Liverpool, England, July 1981. (Photo by Keystone/Hulton Archive/Getty Images)
High unemployment levels had led to a rise in drug use in Liverpool during the eighties(Picture: Keystone/Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

By the time he was in his early twenties, Stu’s relationship had broken down and he’d grown distant from his family. Soon he began to spiral deep into a mental health crisis and began to feel suicidal.

It was during one of his darkest moments that the gangster had what he terms as a ‘lightbulb’ moment: he decided to live under his own terms – whatever it would take.

‘I realised if I kept this up, I’d have 20-plus years in prison or I would wind up dead. I didn’t want to die – I wanted to make a change,’ he remembers.

Turning his back on the life he’d built in the underworld, Stu began working in a care home at 23, then signed up for a course at Liverpool John Moores University to study social work. He later left the city and moved to Sheffield for a fresh start so gang members couldn’t follow him.

Yet despite pride at those successes, he still feels shame.

‘I deeply regret the harm I’ve caused’, Stu admits. ‘During counselling I’ve had to come face to face with my demons again to acknowledge what I did.

‘The stuff we did was horrendous and – for a long time – it would keep me up at night. I’d wake up drenched in sweat thinking of the violence. The worst memories were about the families affected by what I did.

October 30 embargo - Liverpool drug dealer interview Picture: Stu Otten - Causeway
Stu said he had no off switch and would do anything asked of him – no matter how violent (Picture: Causeway)

‘That really affects me now in the position I’m in and with the family I’m lucky to have. But I’ll always be paying back to society for what I’ve done.’

Stu now works at the anti-slavery charity Causeway where he has spearheaded a new set of crime reduction services.

In a new film for the charity, he describes how he has worked in prisons and youth groups to dissuade young people from following in his footsteps. He stresses how childhood trauma impacts adults who wind up embroiled in criminality. 

Around 84% of men in prison have experienced adverse childhood trauma, while the number is even higher for female prisoners, at 94%.

Since leaving the criminal underworld, Stu has worked hard to encourage wider organisations to tackle crime at the prevention stage and bolster community spirit that could help young men and boys imagine a life outside crime.

He has also inspired thousands of people, just like him, to break their cycles of criminal behaviour. 

October 30 embargo - Liverpool drug dealer interview Picture: Stu Otten - Causeway
Stu has turned his life around and has shared his story in a bid to give hope to others (Picture: Causeway)

‘I once worked with a guy who had been involved in a huge multi-million-pound drug conspiracy where he brought heroin into the country,’ Stu explains. ‘He had two long term sentences in prison. During the second, his daughter came to visit and said that if he ended up back behind bars after his release, she would cut all contact.

‘The man came to one of the courses I ran at the prison and, five years later, he’s out of prison and has had no problems. He called once and excitedly told me, “you’ll never guess what, I’ve just had a mortgage accepted.” He’d found a job and a safe way to provide for his family. 

‘To know he’d found peace and no longer had to look over his shoulder made me feel so proud. I want to keep having feelings like that.

‘I’m committed to helping people until the day I die.’

When you get a moment, please can this be updated to this:

Breaking Cycles: Building Lives is Causeway’s latest crime reduction campaign.

You can find out more about the initiative and the work the charity does here.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

READ MORE: ‘I was trafficked at 18 and saw the most horrific things – some of the women never escaped’

READ MORE: Modern slavery is on the up – but the most chilling thing? Anyone can fall victim

READ MORE: From Gangs of London to Line of Duty: What TV gets wrong about drug dealers – from an ex-drug dealer

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https://metro.co.uk/2023/10/31/liverpool-when-id-beat-people-up-i-just-saw-it-as-work-19731466/feed/ 0
Metro’s cost of living campaign is up for an award – and we need your help https://metro.co.uk/2023/10/30/metros-cost-of-living-campaign-is-up-for-an-award-we-need-your-help-19739735/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/10/30/metros-cost-of-living-campaign-is-up-for-an-award-we-need-your-help-19739735/#respond Mon, 30 Oct 2023 12:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19739735
This isn’t about whether breast or formula fed is best – this is simply about making sure babies don’t starve (Picture: Getty Images/Katie Ingham)
This isn’t about whether breast or formula fed is best – this is simply about making sure babies don’t starve (Picture: Getty Images/Katie Ingham)

Since launching Metro’s Formula For Change campaign with the family support charity Feed UK, we’ve received overwhelming support.

From well known names such as Katherine Ryan, Kelsey Parker, Michelle Heaton and Ashley James, alongside MP Preet Gill and MSP Monica Lennon, we’ve also seen our petition calling on the government to overturn outdated guidelines on how baby formula can be bought, hit almost at 50,000 signatures.

Not only that – such is the power of our cost of living campaign, that we’ve had supermarket giant Iceland join forces with us, prompting CEO Richard Walker flout government guidelines to sell cut-price formula.

Just last week, Labour announced their support of the campaign, with Shadow health secretary Wes Streeting told Metro: ‘Regulations that prevent families from using foodbank vouchers to buy infant formula are no longer fit for purpose.

‘We will not stand by while outdated restrictions have a damaging impact on those struggling to make ends meet, which is why Labour’s backing The Metro’s Formula For Change campaign.’

In recognition of all the hard work done so far, Formula for Change has now been shortlisted for a prestigious Making a Difference award – and the winner is decided by you, the public.

VOTE HERE

The awards showcase agenda-setting investigations, campaigns and scoops from national, regional and local news brands demonstrating the power of original news content.

People have just 48 hours between 30 October and 1 November to vote for their favourite campaign from the past year during Journalism Matters week – which is why we’re asking our readers to recognise the power of our campaign and vote for us.

Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
To highlight the need for our campaign, supporter Michelle Heaton visited a baby bank last week to discover the vital work they do for struggling families (Picture: Dominic Whisson)

Why do we need Formula For Change?

For most people, it’s a simple enough task to pop into a local supermarket and buy the basics such as bread, milk, eggs with loyalty points.

But if you have a newborn baby, it’s a different story.

Baby-feeding costs – along with energy bills and grocery costs – have soared to eye-watering levels as inflation remains high. Infant formula can easily cost £15 for a tub.

Sign our petition here

However, shockingly, retailers would be breaking the law to offer any promotions or discounts on the product, and can’t even accept loyalty points or gift vouchers in exchange for it.

This isn’t about whether breast or formula fed is best – this is simply about making sure babies don’t starve.

Read below to find out how you can support the campaign to help make infant formula restrictions history.

How much does baby formula cost?

Kim Anatra mixes a bottle of formula using the family's last can as they struggle to find formula for their 5-month-old daughter, Sienna, amid continuing nationwide shortages in infant and toddler formula, in Houston, Texas, U.S., May 19, 2022. REUTERS/Callaghan O'Hare
Formula milk is vital for parents and guardians where breastfeeding isn’t an option (Picture: Reuters)

Formula can cost around £15 a tin. That tin lasts a week, meaning new parents can easily spend upwards of £70 each month on the product.

Data from First Steps Nutrition shows that the cost of the cheapest brand of formula milk has risen by 45% in the past two years. Other brands have risen between 17% and 31% in that time period.

The rising costs of the product has left many resorting to extreme measures to make ends meet – with some shops trying to counter those shoplifting formula by putting security tags on the product.

Babybanks are struggling to obtain enough formula to distribute to families in need. Volunteers have told Metro.co.uk how some mums have resorted to feeding their newborns water.

Why can’t mums just breastfeed?

Newborn baby boy sucking milk from mothers breast. Portrait of mom and breastfeeding baby.
Not all mothers can or choose to breastfeed for a multitude of reasons (Picture: Getty Images)

Formula milk is a necessity for some. Lower-income mothers working hourly jobs, such as fast-food restaurants or retail, often don’t have the time to breastfeed.

Many mothers have to cut short their maternity leave in order to return to work and pay rising bills.

Some babies can’t drink breast milk (or enough of it to stay well-fed) and some parents can’t breastfeed or produce enough to nourish their babies.

For many, it’s a personal choice. After nine months of pregnancy, some women simply want their bodies back for themselves – and they shouldn’t be shamed for that.

Why can’t you buy baby formula with loyalty points?

formula for change table
The law means shoppers are limited with what they can spend their supermarket loyalty points on (Picture: Metro.co.uk/Getty)

Retail bosses say their hands are tied by strict rules. UK law follows World Health Organisation (WHO) guidelines introduced in 1981, which prohibit shops from featuring infant formula in any in-store or online promotions. 

Baby formula can’t be featured in buy-one-get-one-free deals as a result. 

As a result, parents are unable to use Boots points, Sainsbury’s Nectar Points or Tesco Clubcard points to reduce costs. All three stores say they are simply following all legislation and guidelines relating to baby formula milk.

While you can’t use loyalty points to help feed a newborn baby, you can use the schemes to buy alcohol, sweets, pet food and sugary drinks.

‘If you look at some of the other products that are not allowed to be bought using loyalty card points, it’s alcohol, tobacco, scratch cards and lottery tickets,’ Katherine O’Brien, Associate Director of the British Pregnancy Advisory Service tells Metro.co.uk. ‘Those are things we usually associate with not being very good for people or to be consumed in moderation.

‘If we lump formula into that category, it understandably reinforces the negative stigma surrounding formula. It shouldn’t be about pitting formula feeding mums against breastfeeding mums. It should be about supporting all mums.’

How the Formula for Change campaign started?

Metro nominated for award following Formula for Change success
We are calling on the government to give retailers the green light to accept loyalty points, all food bank vouchers and store gift cards as payment for infant formula (Picture: Metro Newspaper)

Rather than accept the ‘outdated’ laws, Metro decided to do something about it. Spearheaded by Metro’s Claie Wilson and writer Kat Romero, the Formula For Change campaign was born in partnership with the family support charity Feed, founded by Dr Erin Williams, Dr. Rosie McNee and Kate Wishart.

Metro is now calling on the government to urgently review their infant formula legislation and give retailers the green light to accept loyalty points, all food bank vouchers and store gift cards as payment for infant formula.

Speaking about why the charity was proud to partner up on the campaign, Feed co-founder Dr Erin Williams told Metro.co.uk: ‘Families who are struggling financially are being hit in the pocket as the formula companies prices and profits continue to rise.

FORMULA FOR CHANGE: HOW YOU CAN HELP

Join Metro.co.uk and Feed in calling on the government to urgently review their infant formula legislation and give retailers the green light to accept loyalty points, all food bank vouchers and store gift cards as payment for infant formula.

Our aim is to take our petition to No.10 to show the Prime Minister this is an issue that can no longer be ignored.

The more signatures we get, the louder our voice, so please click here to sign our Formula for Change petition.

Things need to change NOW.

‘We hear from so many mums who tell us that being able to use cash-equivalent methods to buy infant formula – which is the aim of our Formula for Change campaign – would make a real difference to them.

‘Since launching our Formula For Change campaign with Metro, we’ve been blown away by the support it’s had. We’re so pleased that the campaign has also sparked a wider discussion on how we can better support all women to feed their babies, particularly women living in food insecurity.

‘The recognition of the impact of our campaign by the News Media Association really means alot to us.’

Who has backed the campaign?

You may have seen the Labour Party announce their support for the Formula for Change campaign just last week.

Shadow health secretary Wes Streeting told Metro: ‘Regulations that prevent families from using foodbank vouchers to buy infant formula are no longer fit for purpose.

‘We will not stand by while outdated restrictions have a damaging impact on those struggling to make ends meet, which is why Labour’s backing The Metro’s Formula For Change campaign.’

Mr Streeting’s comments came after Labour MP Preet Gill told us: ‘For mothers already enduring a cost-of-living crisis, the rising cost of baby formula is crippling.

‘I support Metro and Feed’s campaign to get the government to overturn the current ban on purchasing formula with loyalty cards, such as Nectar, Boots or Tesco Clubcard, and vouchers.’

There are also plenty of famous faces who have voiced their support

Comedian Katherine Ryan told Metro: ‘Mums have it tough enough… No mum should have to worry about whether she can feed her child. I fully support this campaign and hope we can tackle this issue.’

What help is out there?

A Caucasian parent scoops infant formula for feeding their baby into a bottle. Current formula shortage in the United States has many families feeling food insecurity.
Charities and baby banks are desperately trying to support new parents (Picture: Getty Images)

The Healthy Start programme was introduced across the UK in 2006, to provide a nutritional safety-net for low-income mothers and families. But at £8.50 a week, the vouchers don’t even cover the cost of even the cheapest formula on the market.

In desperate situations, many people turn to food banks or baby banks for support. However, that has also proved complicated, as some are hesitant to stock formula because they adhere to UNICEF guidelines. These guidelines state that giving out formula can inadvertently cause harm if they are given the wrong type of product.

But the majority of babybanks are there to help, so don’t hesitate to reach out for help when you need it.

You can also contact Feed for support. The charity’s groundbreaking research has shown that alternative routes of accessing formula are a postcode lottery for families. Many Local Authorities have no emergency formula provision scheme and Health Visitors and other family support workers are relying on local foodbanks to provide formula for the families in their care. 

What happens next?

Foot of newborn baby on warm blanket
Spread the word and become part of the growing Formula for Change campaign (Picture: Getty Images)

Grocery giant Iceland became the first retailer to lend its public support to Metro.co.uk and Feed’s Formula for Change campaign, calling on the government to scrap ‘archaic’ laws restricting how retailers can sell baby formula amid the cost of living crisis.

Richard Walker, the CEO, boldly said he was willing for the company to ‘illegally’ accept vouchers in exchange for milk.

More supermarkets can, like Iceland, be encouraged to back the Formula for Change campaign and make a difference. Why don’t you try writing to yours? Or contacting your MP to raise the issue?

Do you have a local baby bank you can support, or even volunteer with? 

Our ultimate aim is to take our petition to Downing Street and show the Prime Minister just how important this issue is.So, once you’ve voted for our campaign make sure you’ve signed the Formula for Change petition. Once it reaches its target, it will be hard for the government to ignore.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

READ MORE: Iceland will ‘illegally accept vouchers’ to help struggling families buy baby formula

READ MORE: Labour vows to change ‘outdated and damaging’ restrictions on baby formula

READ MORE: Mums ‘out of options’ as Government urged to act on baby formula costs

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‘Even with both parents in work, some families can’t afford the basics – they are fighting to survive right now’ https://metro.co.uk/2023/10/30/baby-bank-reveals-the-shocking-toll-of-cost-of-living-crisis-19724043/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/10/30/baby-bank-reveals-the-shocking-toll-of-cost-of-living-crisis-19724043/#respond Mon, 30 Oct 2023 06:30:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19724043
Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
Michelle Heaton visited Little Village Baby Bank as part of Metro’s Formula For Change campaign (Picture: Dominic Whisson)

Packing up donation boxes for families in need at the Little Village hub in Brent, Michelle Heaton appears overcome with emotion.

As she sifts through the tiny sleepsuits and fluffy toys, she takes a pause and leans forward to offer Renata, the site manager, a hug.

‘I don’t know what I expected today but this place is so much more,’ she explains, wiping her tears. ‘You’re not just giving families what they need but what they want. It gives them pride, dignity and love.’

Little Village is a baby bank network based in London that aims to support families with children under five living in poverty. Launched in 2016, the charity operates on a referral basis from health care professionals but has sadly seen the demand for help soar in recent years as the cost of living crisis plunges more and more families into financial struggle.

SIGN OUR FORMULA FOR CHANGE PETITION HERE

‘We have seen a big rise in the need for help,’ Renata tells Michelle. ‘As a network, we don’t have the capacity to cover all the referrals from families that we get. People are struggling so much.

‘There can be many reasons why people struggle. It can often be domestic violence, substance abuse issues, sickness or they are asylum seekers. But we’re also now seeing families with two parents both in work who still can’t afford all the basics. Their salaries simply don’t cover the bills and the necessities.’

The charity offers families clothing, blankets, cots, prams, books and toys. But Renata says a common request is for first infant baby formula, something Little Village can’t provide due to storage issues.

Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
‘We’re now seeing families with two parents both in work who still can’t afford all the basics. Their salaries simply don’t cover the bills and the necessities.’ (Picture : Dominic Whisson)
Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
Some charities have been forced to ration formula due to a surge of families struggling to afford it. (Picture: Dominic Whisson)

‘We can’t keep it here due to space and we simply don’t have the funds to buy it,’ she tells Michelle. ‘It’s very expensive. But we do get so many requests for formula. In those cases, all we can do is point them in the direction of local food banks to see if they can help.’

Sadly, not all food banks supply formula and last month, it was reported that some charities were being forced to ration it due to a surge of families struggling to afford it. 

It was also recently reported that baby formula had risen in price by 24% in the last two years and to make matters worse, current government policy prohibits the promotion of formula and therefore retailers do not include it in their loyalty card schemes or offer price promotions or reductions. In extreme cases, families have been watering down the formula to make it last longer.

This issue has been the driving force behind Metro and family support charity Feed’s Formula For Change campaign, which is calling on the government to urgently review their infant formula legislation and give retailers the green light to accept loyalty points, all food bank vouchers and store gift cards as payment for infant formula.

Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
Renata and Michelle go through some of the products available to families at the baby bank (Picture: Dominic Whisson)
Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
Nappies are always in high demand (Picture: Dominic Whisson)

Since it was launched, it has received support from Labour, Iceland supermarket – who are actively defying government guidelines – and a host of well known-names, including Katherine Ryan and Kesley Parker.

Michelle was one of the first celebrities to lend her support to the campaign and offered to help however she could – including her visit to Little Village.

After welcoming her son AJ in 2014, Michelle – who is also a mum to daughter Faith, 11, with husband Hugh Hanley – had to formula feed after undergoing a double mastectomy just two years prior.

‘I couldn’t breastfeed but I still felt that pressure from people,’ she tells Renata at Little Village. ‘I also recognise how lucky I was to be able to afford formula. I know there are many families that can not and that’s evident when you spend time at a place like Little Village.

‘That’s why I’m so passionate about Formula For Change and trying to help make a difference. Formula isn’t a luxury. It’s a necessity. We need this outdated government restriction on formula to change because it’s taking a devastating toll.’

‘That would do a lot to help,’ Renata agrees. ‘Families are fighting right now for the basics.’

Little Village couldn’t be further from what you’d expect of a baby bank. The space is designed to look like a children’s store, with the shelves lined with plush toys, books and blankets and the rails filled with little coats, cardigans and jackets. 

Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
The baby bank has been laid out to look like a shop (Picture: Dominic Whisson)
Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
Most items are second hand but they’re all in good condition. The whole idea is that families are getting a gift’ (Picture: Dominic Whisson)

‘We try to create a shopping experience,’ Renata explains to Michelle. ‘We call it a retail experience. Families can come in for a one hour slot and essentially shop for what they need. Most items are second hand but they’re all in good condition. The whole idea is that families are getting a gift.’

The charity also puts together donation packages based on referral forms that list a child’s gender and age.

As one comes in for a baby boy aged between three to six months, Michelle gets to work to pack it up for him. She sifts through the books, nostalgically pulling out ones that she had read to her own children. She takes time and care to find something she thinks this baby boy will want. 

Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
Michelle made a donation box for a little boy (Picture: Dominic Whisson)
Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
‘A baby in desperate need of a toy? It’s so sad when you say it out loud. But that’s the reality, isn’t it?'(Picture: Dominic Whisson)

As she heads over to the section of toys, she becomes visibly emotional as she starts to piece together a picture of this child in need.

‘I just imagine in my head the look of joy on the families’ faces when they get the bundle,’she says quietly. ‘It can ease the pain or hardship a little bit for them and maybe help them get through winter. But a baby in desperate need of a toy? It’s so sad when you say it out loud. But that’s the reality, isn’t it?’

The situation also resonates with Michelle as the referral form also lists the reasons why a family is struggling – and this most recent one cites issues with alcohol. 

The former Hear’Say singer entered rehab at The Priory in 2021 for alcohol addiction and has said that at her lowest, she had given up on life and just ‘wanted to die’.

In April this year, she celebrated two years without alcohol, but still works hard on her sobriety.

Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
Some babybanks are unable to offer infant formula due to storage issues (Picture: Dominic Whisson)
Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
Renata explains that despite the joyful feeling that emanates throughout Little Village, families can often become emotional as they open up about their story (Picture: Dominic Whisson)

‘I know that addiction doesn’t discriminate,’ she tells Metro. ‘It doesn’t matter if you’re in poverty or have money. Addiction doesn’t have a face. I have met many women who have struggled to seek help when they needed it. It’s so hard when you’re a mother too. There’s a lot of shame attached. I can’t imagine what some of these families are going through. I’m just thankful they have somewhere like this to come.’

Site manager Renata explains that despite the joyful feeling that emanates throughout Little Village, families can often become emotional as they open up about their story.

‘This is a hard job to do,’ she tells Michelle. ‘We offer a safe space and I think that makes people feel they can be vulnerable with us. I’ve heard of families keeping the heating off through winter so they can afford food or families who are forced to leave their babies in soiled nappies because they don’t have the money for a fresh pack.

‘Some families have nothing, not even furniture and their babies are sleeping on the floor. We try to help as much as we can but this is a wider issue that needs addressing.’

As Michelle gets ready to leave at the end of the day, she takes the time to thank each staff member individually for their help. 

Michelle Heaton, Little Village Baby Bank - Metro News
‘I didn’t realise I’d get so emotional but I hate to think of other mums struggling’ (Picture: Dominic Whisson)

This place was nothing like I pictured it would be,’ she tells Metro on the way out. ‘I didn’t realise I’d get so emotional but I hate to think of other mums struggling. I’m going to go home now and give my family a big hug.’

She adds: ‘Little Village has proved once again why Formula For Change is such a needed campaign and I’m so happy to help and be a part of it. Families are in such a desperate struggle right now. Places like this offer so much but they can’t offer formula so we need to make sure baby milk is accessible for everyone. 

‘No mother should have to choose between heating or food. Every mother hopes to give her child the best. They shouldn’t have to choose between the basic necessities.’

FORMULA FOR CHANGE: HOW YOU CAN HELP

Join Metro.co.uk and Feed in calling on the government to urgently review their infant formula legislation and give retailers the green light to accept loyalty points, all food bank vouchers and store gift cards as payment for infant formula.

Our aim is to take our petition to No.10 to show the Prime Minister this is an issue that can no longer be ignored.

The more signatures we get, the louder our voice, so please click here to sign our Formula for Change petition.

Things need to change NOW.

MORE : Labour vows to change ‘outdated and damaging’ restrictions on baby formula

MORE : Following Metro’s Formula For Change campaign, Iceland makes bold move to help struggling families

MORE : The great formula scandal – when did feeding babies stop being a priority?

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Naked headstands, fluffy cardigans and even a Disney favourite – cam girls reveal their strangest requests https://metro.co.uk/2023/10/29/cam-girls-reveal-their-strangest-requests-19731464/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/10/29/cam-girls-reveal-their-strangest-requests-19731464/#respond Sun, 29 Oct 2023 14:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19731464
Cam-girls have faced all manner of fetish-based fantasies (Picture: Getty Images/Rex)
Cam-girls have faced all manner of fetish-based fantasies (Picture: Getty Images/Rex)

‘A girl was asked by her client to “be an octopus”. She didn’t know how to be one so called me for advice. So, we practiced some wavy arm movements and hoped for the best.’

No day is the same for Rachel Lee, owner of the Regency Model Management. She oversees the work of several cam-girls and often sits in on sessions when they’re getting started.

In her time on both sides of the webcam, she’s witnessed all sorts of strange requests.

‘A lot of clients will tell you what they’re after, which makes things easier,’ she tells Miranda Kane on Metro’s Smutdrop podcast.

‘I used to have a client I’d call “Mr Dildo Man” who was pretty memorable. He used to glue dildos to his back and pretend he was a T-Rex. I had to pretend I was into that.

‘We also have a few couples who do cam-work together for clients. They enjoy the experience of being watched.

‘There’s one woman – she’ll kill me for saying this – who had a client tell her “oh, lick your husband’s arsehole, taste the strawberry rainbow.” It’s hilarious.’

Cam-girls have become accustomed to all manner of fetish-based fantasies, but Rachel admits that they’re still occasionally left lost for words.

Rachel Lee and Lucy Lucious told the Smutdrop podcast about their most memorable experiences
Rachel Lee and Lucy Lucious told the Smutdrop podcast about their most memorable experiences

Her strangest experience came in the form of one very unexpected cartoon character. Stop reading now if you’d like your childhood memories of Winnie the Pooh to remain untarnished.

In a call, one of Rachel’s clients revealed how he found himself rather aroused by the scantily clad bear.

‘He was very into Disney,’ she recalled. 

‘The client said “If I buy you a costume, would you wear it and sing one of Winnie the Pooh’s songs?” He offered me a grand, so I said I’d do it.’

After her yellow and red costume arrived in the post, Rachel turned on her webcam and gave a rendition of ‘Up, Down, Touch the Ground’ – one of Winnie’s greatest hits.

Cam-girls often share their requests and brainstorm ideas on how to give the best performance possible. Each client is unique, for varying reasons.

‘I’ve seen a lot of cocks in my time’, Rachel muses.

‘But we used to have a client who we called “Hung to My Knees” and I’m not joking, I’ve never seen anything like that in my life. It was huge! And entirely natural.’

During the episode Rachel’s colleague Lucy – who goes by Lucy Luscious online – also revealed her share of surprising clients.

She has been forced to turn down various acrobats – ‘I was asked to do a handstand once – I’m 46, that was not happening’ – but says she remains open-minded in relation to her journey through the fetish ecosystem.

Asian woman's legs with golden anklet on the bed
Rachel’s colleague Lucy – who goes by Lucy Luscious online – also revealed her share of surprising clients. (Picture: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

Lucy told the podcast: ‘I’m learning each day about new fetishes. The weirdest one involved chocolate sauce. I ended up with it all over my face and glasses, it was dripping onto the floor. I couldn’t see a thing.

‘I also have one client I call “cardigan guy” who is amazing. He likes fluffy things so before the first time we called, I went out and bought some things.

‘During our hour-long session, I just sat there in my fluffy cardigan and we talked about soft blankets and clothes and how the textures made our skin feel. It was all really nice.’

On another occasion, Lucy was offered cash to film herself sleeping. She donned her favourite cosy pajamas, snuggled up in bed and drifted off. By the time she woke up, she’d earned £80 from a satisfied customer.

Smut Drop answers all the questions you were too shy to ask

Smut Drop is a weekly podcast with host Miranda Kane from Metro.co.uk, touching on sex, dating and relationships.

With no holds barred, it’s the home of sex positive chat, where Miranda will be joined each week by sexperts and special guests to explore the world of the erotic.

And we want to hear from you, too! As part of our podcast we’ll be sharing listeners’ experiences, thoughts and questions on a different theme every week.

So if you want to be involved in something brilliant – either anonymously or using your bold and beautiful name – drop us an email to smutdrop@metro.co.uk or slide into our DMs on Twitter @smutdrop.With new episodes dropping every Wednesday, you can download Smut Drop from all your usual places.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Kirsten.Robertson@metro.co.uk 

Share your views in the comments below.

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