Health – Metro https://metro.co.uk Metro.co.uk: News, Sport, Showbiz, Celebrities from Metro Wed, 22 Nov 2023 16:16:30 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.3.2 https://metro.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/cropped-m-icon-black-9693.png?w=32 Health – Metro https://metro.co.uk 32 32 The mistake you’re (probably) making every time you do a plank – and how to fix it https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/23/planking-hurt-lower-back-stop-making-this-simple-mistake-19850365/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/23/planking-hurt-lower-back-stop-making-this-simple-mistake-19850365/#respond Thu, 23 Nov 2023 06:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19850365
Woman doing plank
Think like a board, be a board (Picture: Getty Images)

I think we can all agree that ab workouts, no matter how simple, are the bane of our existence.

But what if we told you that you are wasting your time by performing one of the fundamental core exercises incorrectly?

Of course we’re talking about the humble (read: evil) plank, without which no real ab workout is complete. 

So, what are the real benefits of planking?

Strengthening your core is about more than getting washboard abs – it’s about being able to move better, improve your posture, and reduce back and neck pain. 

Studies have found that planks in particular can help to lower blood pressure as well as improve muscle strength, endurance and flexibility. 

‘A plank is an easy full body exercise; despite being an ab workout, the plank activates various muscles in the body and with enough consistency you’ll feel the effect all over,’ Lauren Adams, a personal trainer and coach at Fighting Fit Manchester, tells Metro.co.uk.

‘Planking improves posture, balance and coordination, spinal health, upper, lower body and abdominal strength and enhances muscular endurance and functional fitness.’

The most common mistake made while planking — and how to fix it

All of these benefits, however, may be mitigated if you’re not performing the exercise correctly — and, unfortunately, mistakes are pretty common.

The most common mistake people make while performing a plank is arching their lower back.

This takes all the emphasis off your abs and places it on your lower back… ouch.

‘When arching you’re not using or working your core at all and this will put strain on your lower back,’ says Lauren. 

So how do you fix it?

It’s all about trying to stay as straight as possible and engaging your core as much as you can by drawing your belly button in and squeezing your glutes.

‘Make sure your shoulders are wide and that your palms are also wide on the floor straight out in front of you,’ says Lauren.

‘By widening the shoulders, the weight is taken off the upper body and you’re better able to engage the core muscles that need to be working.

‘On top of that, keep your hips in line with your shoulders by lifting your thighs away from the floor, drawing your belly button towards your spine and squeezing your glutes.

‘Aim for a neutral spine — a straight line from the head, shoulders, hips, knees and ankles.’

How to perform a plank correctly:

1. Starting on your hands and knees, place your hands directly under your shoulders, slightly wider than shoulder width apart.

2. Place your forearms on the floor with your elbows aligned below your shoulders and arms parallel to your body at about shoulder width. If keeping your palms flat bothers your wrists, clasp your hands together.

3. Step your feet back until your body makes a line from shoulders to heels.

4. Ground your toes into the floor and squeeze your glutes to stabilise your body – your legs should be working too, but avoid locking or hyperextending your knees.

5. Neutralise your neck and spine by looking at a spot on the floor about a foot beyond your hands — your head should be in line with your back.

6. Hold the position for 20 seconds. As you get more comfortable with the move, hold your plank for as long as possible without compromising your form or breath.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

MORE : This 10-minute home workout is better for you than an hour of walking

MORE : Got a spare 5 minutes? Strengthen your core with these easy ab exercises

MORE : Do these easy 5-minute exercises every day to improve your terrible posture

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Backlash after cervical cancer campaign appears to ‘sexualise’ smear tests https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/backlash-cancer-campaign-appears-sexualise-smear-tests-19860002/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/backlash-cancer-campaign-appears-sexualise-smear-tests-19860002/#respond Wed, 22 Nov 2023 11:45:25 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19860002
advert at Manchester Piccadilly station
People haven’t been impressed (Picture: @NorthWestCancer/X)

A cervical cancer screening campaign has been met with backlash for ‘sexualising’ the medical procedure.

The strap line for North West Cancer Research’s campaign is ‘Don’t Keep Em Crossed’ and features sculptures of bare crossed legs, with pointed toes.

Cervical cancer rates in the region are 19% higher than in the rest of England, and the installation features at Manchester’s Piccadilly Station.

While the well-intentioned could be seen as reclaiming the line – often used in reference to suggest women must be more ‘ladylike’ and cross their legs – we’re struggling to understand how it ties in with smear test uptake.

One woman on Mumsnet summed up the confusing legs with: ‘It looks like a promo for a lovely legs competition in a seaside resort in the 1970s.’

The advert reads: ‘Our region’s cervical cancer rates are 19% higher than the rest of England. Yet almost 1 in 3 people aged 25-49 in the North West don’t attend their cervical screening leaving their risk of developing cervical cancer to chance.’ 

advert at Manchester Piccadilly station
Sexualised (Picture: @NorthWestCancer/X)

Viewers, understandably, haven’t been impressed.

Debbie Cameron, a feminist campaigner and Oxford University professor, wrote on X: ‘What is the matter with people who design campaigns to encourage cervical cancer screening?

”’Don’t keep em crossed” is a line for a lech (and ”you should have kept them crossed” is an old excuse for rape). The whole thing is objectifying and offensive.’ 

Another writer and feminist, Toni Hargis, said: ‘Can’t believe it. WHO thought this was a good idea? Sexualising a vital health procedure and using a phrase that’s employed to shame women.’

Many women have questioned how effective the advert will be in achieving its goals of getting more people to have their screenings – people know that smear tests can be uncomfortable, and a sexy pair of legs isn’t going to fool anyone.

However, most smears are over within 10 minutes, and shouldn’t cause pain. Those with a cervix can also ask for a smaller speculum if needed, and listen to music to focus on something else.

Sophia Smith Galer, the author of Losing It, said of the misguided campaign: ‘Cervical screening campaigns like this put an onus of failure not on the healthcare systems that have failed to create a more comfortable screening, but on women and people themselves.

‘These are traumatising for many of us beyond our control.’

Despite the backlash, Karen Swan, director of Influential – the advertising firm behind the campaign – has doubled down and said it was deliberately ‘playful and a bit cheeky’ to ‘grab attention’.

She described the Don’t Keep ’em Crossed’ strapline as ‘perfect’. 

A spokesperson for North West Cancer Research said: ‘Our campaign was designed by women, led by woman and it is their legs that feature in the photographs supporting the work.

‘It is obviously disappointing to find that the style and tone of the approach we have taken on this occasion has caused some disquiet. We are going to reflect on all the comments we have received. 

‘The work was designed to draw attention to the underlying problem – which is people keeping things crossed and hoping for the best. We acknowledge there has been some negative reaction, but it does not reflect all the feedback we have received.’

They also said women at Manchester Piccadilly station had ‘come forward to share their stories and thank us for drawing attention to the issue’. 

What are the symptoms of cervical cancer?

Cervical cancer affects the lining of the lower part of womb. The most common symptom is unusual bleeding, such as between periods, during sex or after the menopause, but other signs can include:

  • Pain during sex
  • Vaginal discharge that smells 
  • Pain in the pelvis

Causes can include:

  • Age – more than half of sufferers are under 45
  • HPV infection – which affects most people at some point in their lives
  • Smoking – responsible for 21% of cases
  • Contraceptive pill – linked to 10% of cases
  • Having children
  • Family history of cervical or other types of cancer

Source: Cancer Research UK 

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

MORE : I’m a YouTuber with 1.4million subscribers — people underestimate the pressure

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‘If Jess had called, I could’ve saved her life’: Why we’re Samaritans volunteers https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/samaritans-volunteers-share-stories-behind-life-saving-work-19678726/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/22/samaritans-volunteers-share-stories-behind-life-saving-work-19678726/#respond Wed, 22 Nov 2023 07:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19678726
Roxy (left) and Jess (right) with their friend Andrea (middle)
Samaritans volunteer Roxy McCarthy (left), with her late friend Jess Norris (right) and their friend Andrea (middle) (Picture: Roxy McCarthy)

Roxy McCarthy, 30, will never forget the day she stood at the graveside of her friend Jess Norris, who took her own life in 2020 aged just 27.

For Roxy, the heartbreaking day was the catalyst for her signing up to help with the Samaritans, where she now answers potentially life-saving calls as one of the charity’s 23,000 volunteers.

‘When you go and stand at the graveside of someone that young, I couldn’t not do anything,’ she tells Metro.co.uk.

‘I needed to do more. I was in a position where I could volunteer and give my time.

‘What keeps me coming back to the phone every week for those few hours? I think if it was Jess that called and I picked up the phone, I could’ve saved her life.

‘I hope I’ve saved lives. I’ve had a lot of conversations, so I probably have.’

Roxy had known Jess since they were both 11 years old, but she wasn’t the first person she had lost to suicide. Roxy lost her birth father too, although Jess was the loss that truly left her in ‘shock’.

The volunteer had even phoned Samaritans herself after losing her grandad in 2017, who was a ‘grandad and a dad’ all in one. Now, she dedicates hours of her free time each week to helping those on the other end of the line.

Last year, there wasn’t a single second when Samaritans volunteers weren’t on the phone to someone. They responded to almost three million calls, spending almost one million hours on the phone — this doesn’t begin to cover the time spent answering emails, online chats, letters, or face-to-face pleas for help.

Remembering the moment she found out about Jess’ death, Roxy tells Metro.co.uk: ‘With suicide you almost have no signs and it’s very “this has happened”.

‘It was another friend of hers who rang me and told me. As soon as I picked the phone up I just knew something was wrong.

‘I don’t think she even said the words — it was just “she’s gone” — I put two and two together.

‘The press that was released about it was very descriptive and that’s what made me not okay, knowing what happened.

‘That was the challenge because you’ve constantly got that picture in your mind. You just relive, relive, relive.’

Roxy dressed as 'Mental Elf' to promote conversations around mental health
Roxy dressed as ‘Mental Elf’ to promote conversations around mental health (Picture: Roxy)

Jess was ‘so young and the life and soul of the party,’ adds Roxy.

‘She was open about her alcoholism and depression but she tried to help people. She is important, and I feel like I’m in a position to continue her legacy of helping people.’

Roxy says she always sees herself as being very ‘similar’ to Jess and has fond memories of going round to her house after school.

‘She had started doing pole fitness at school and got a lot of stick for it,’ Roxy remembers. ‘But I’d go round her house and she’d try and teach me, and she’d say it was good for my fitness.

‘Then she went on to have her own pole fitness businesses and became Miss Pole Dance UK. That was her passion and that was what she wanted to do — Covid took her routine, exercise and coping mechanisms away.’

Now, Roxy answers calls in an inconspicuous, small-scale building, which houses six sound-proofed desks in a small room above a kitchen stocked with biscuits.

Many of the volunteers wish to remain anonymous, with deeply personal stories leading them to the Samaritans’ offices. But Metro.co.uk was invited inside, to see the life-saving work in action.

Volunteers sit nestled at their chosen desks, armed with a cup of tea and six weeks of training, making them the best listeners around.

Not every caller is in crisis. One of the most memorable calls volunteer Victoria answered was from a lonely woman on her birthday.

Victoria says: ‘Somebody called and she said “it’s my birthday and there’s not one person I’ve spoken to today. I’ve not had a card from anyone, and I’m so lonely. The only voice I will hear today is yours”.

‘She was incredibly lonely, so it was great to just be there and chat with her for a bit.’

Volunteer Victoria at her desk in the Samaritans branch
Volunteer Victoria at her desk in the Samaritans branch (Picture: Samaritans)

Victoria’s uncle used to volunteer for Samaritans when she was a teenager and she used to think it was ‘really amazing’, finding herself intrigued about the prospect of volunteering herself.

Life got in the way for a while but after being made redundant, Victoria, decided to use her time to volunteer for Samaritans and found herself sat alongside Lara, who also shared a call she’d had from someone who was struggling with depression.

‘The caller was in a very dark, very low place and actually just needed someone to talk to and listen. I think they didn’t really know what to do and they felt very alone,’ Lara says.

‘At the end the caller said “I actually feel like I can get out of bed now, because of you I can make it out today”. That was that was that stuck with me.’

Lara had always been interested in working in mental health and there was a Samaritans branch in the town she grew up in. So, after attending university and getting a job, she chose to go and train as a volunteer.

Volunteer Lara who loves volunteering for Samaritans
Volunteer Lara who loves volunteering for Samaritans (Picture: Lara)

For Roxy, a surprise positive call, around the time of the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee, is probably the most memorable.

‘A caller rang and said “I’m ringing up with a good news story”,’ Roxy says.

‘They’d rang Samaritans quite a few times for depression and anxiety and it had given them the space to talk and they’d picked up this new hobby they’d talked through on a previous call.

‘This hobby had got them out and they’d managed to make friends. They’d been invited to a Jubilee party, at least three parties actually, and they said “I just wanted to ring and say thank you because I wouldn’t be invited to these parties, and feel like I’m able to go, if it wasn’t for your support”.’

Just as those calls had been turning points for those who were struggling, Roxy shared that her call with a Samaritan had been a ‘turning point’ for her and ‘potentially changed [her] life’, stopping her from going down a ‘bad path’.

What happens when you call Samaritans:

Volunteers are encouraged to answer calls with ‘Samaritans, can I help you?’

They will simply then provide space for the caller to talk through what they are facing. Volunteers may prompt them with questions like ‘can you tell me more’, ‘tell me what’s been happening in your day’ etc. but callers can take it all at their own pace.

It’s your call and you can talk about what you want to. Volunteers are there just to listen.

This was all because someone had listened — properly. Yes, there’s a right way to listen.

Volunteers each receive six weeks of training before they’re allowed to take any calls from members of the public.

These include between five and 10 group sessions, either face-to-face or online, where volunteers can develop people skills and practice active listening.

Victoria explains: ‘You do lots of sort of practice calls with somebody on the other side, so you have quite a good idea what it might be like but nothing prepares you for every time you pick up the phone. You have to catch your breath.’

John was about to start his very first Samaritans shift when I visited the branch. He says: ‘The training is quite intense and you have the knowledge that you’re going to be on the phones pretty soon.

John at his desk taking calls
John at his desk taking calls (Picture: Samaritans)

‘I’m also I’m not the kind of person that will ever feel ready to do anything for the first time, so I think maybe other potential volunteers are a bit more relaxed in that process.

‘I would say I have felt kind of under a certain healthy amount of pressure but with practice it will settle down.’

Samaritans volunteers also receive ongoing training several times a year to keep building their skills.

Roxy says: ‘I thought I was a good listener before Samaritans but, if you care about someone, you’re a fixer. You want to offer advice and fix what they’re feeling but sometimes that’s not the answer.

‘You’re not an expert in that person’s life, so listening to them is key — they’re the expert in their life, you’re not.’

Roxy is running the London Marathon for Samaritans in April 2024, as am I, because we’ve both lost a loved one who needed someone to listen.

Samaritans is Charity of the Year for the 2024 TCS London Marathon.​ To get involved and show you believe in tomorrow, visit samaritans.org/tcs-london-marathon-2024/

Need support?

For emotional support you can call the Samaritans 24-hour helpline on 116 123, email jo@samaritans.org, visit a Samaritans branch in person or go to the Samaritans website.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

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Heartbreak left me bald — and now men reject me on dating apps https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/21/single-woman-says-men-reject-finding-bald-spots-19855713/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/21/single-woman-says-men-reject-finding-bald-spots-19855713/#respond Tue, 21 Nov 2023 17:04:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19855713
Woman with alopecia rejected on dating apps
Lynn Sinclair has been rejected by men on dating apps because of her bald spots (Picture: Kennedy News)

A woman claims years of heartbreak left her going bald and now men reject her on dating apps when she tells them.

Lynn Sinclair, a 47-year-old singleton from Stockton-on-Tees, County Durham, has had an increasingly difficult time finding dates on online after opening up about her condition to potential suitors. 

Her honesty prior to going out on dates with men has led them to reject her. The mum-of-one was diagnosed with the autoimmune disease alopecia in October after a bald patch appeared out of the blue on the top of her head.

Lynn didn’t give it too much thought at the time, until the bald patch grew to the size of a tennis ball.

After discovering the bald patch last month, further bald patches appeared, which Lynn called ‘devastating’. 

‘About six weeks ago, I was driving my van for work and noticed my head was really itchy,’ she said.

‘I thought “do I have nits?” When I got home, I saw a little bald patch and thought it must just be the light and didn’t really give it a second thought.

‘A week later my hair was down, I took a picture and I noticed there was quite a big bald patch on the top of my head about the size of a tennis ball.

PIC FROM Kennedy News and Media (PIC SHOWS: LYNN SINCLAIR, 47, SAID HER ALOPECIA DIAGNOSIS HAS STOOD IN THE WAY OF HER DATING) A singleton claims years of heartbreak left her going BALD - and now cruel blokes on Tinder REJECT her when she tells them ahead of their date. Lynn Sinclair was shocked when multiple men refused to carry on a conversation with her online after sharing she has alopecia. The 47-year-old, who lives in Stockton on Tees, Durham, wanted to be open with potential romances about her condition - but her honesty has led to suitors ending all prospects of a relationship. DISCLAIMER: While Kennedy News and Media uses its best endeavours to establish the copyright and authenticity of all pictures supplied, it accepts no liability for any damage, loss or legal action caused by the use of images supplied and the publication of images is solely at your discretion. SEE KENNEDY NEWS COPY - 0161 697 4266
Men on dating apps have no qualms with rejecting Lynn after learning she has alopecia (Picture: Kennedy News)

‘I went to the doctors the next day, did some blood tests and they were all fine and they told me to go to a skin specialist and that it’s definitely alopecia.

‘About a week or so ago, I thought my hair was growing back but then I noticed some more bald patches but apparently that’s what happens with alopecia.

‘A week before there was no bald patch, it’s really come out of nowhere. I was absolutely devastated. I rang my sister crying my eyes out.

‘You can’t do anything about it. They don’t know if it’ll grow back or I’ll be completely bald.

PIC FROM Kennedy News and Media (PIC SHOWS: LYNN SINCLAIR, 47, WAS SHOCKED TO DISCOVER A TENNIS BALL-SIZED BALD PATCH APPEAR ON HER HEAD) A singleton claims years of heartbreak left her going BALD - and now cruel blokes on Tinder REJECT her when she tells them ahead of their date. Lynn Sinclair was shocked when multiple men refused to carry on a conversation with her online after sharing she has alopecia. The 47-year-old, who lives in Stockton on Tees, Durham, wanted to be open with potential romances about her condition - but her honesty has led to suitors ending all prospects of a relationship. DISCLAIMER: While Kennedy News and Media uses its best endeavours to establish the copyright and authenticity of all pictures supplied, it accepts no liability for any damage, loss or legal action caused by the use of images supplied and the publication of images is solely at your discretion. SEE KENNEDY NEWS COPY - 0161 697 4266
Lynn always tells men on dating apps about her alopecia(Picture: Kennedy News)

The food van driver of 23 years said the negative reactions to her condition have made her want to ‘swear off men’ for life.

But she stands by honesty being the best possibly for a very key reason.

‘I normally bring the alopecia up quite quickly like straight away. I just like to get it out there and be honest,’ she said.

‘I like to be upfront and honest with people. My hair’s getting thinner and thinner.

‘They would probably notice so I thought I’d just tell people and I expected people to say ‘yeah it’s fine’ but it’s been a very different reaction.’

What is alopecia?

Alopecia is a common condition that causes hair to fall out in patches. It develops when the immune system attacks your hair follicles. 

There are different types of alopecia and various medical conditions can cause hair loss. Alopecia Areata is thought to be an autoimmune condition that causes hair to fall out, usually in round oval patches on the scalp or other places on the body from which hair grows, like eyebrows or eyelashes. 

In some cases the hair might regrow without treatment although traditional treatments includes steroids that are either injected or applied directly to the affected areas via creams or liquids to suppress the immune cells attacking the hair follicles.

Although her condition didn’t stop her from continuing her search for love on popular dating apps like Tinder, Hinge and Facebook Dating, the men she matched with proved less than understanding.

Lynn recalled how conversations with men would come to an end with them wishing her good luck on her search for a partner and effectively taking themselves out of consideration.

‘As soon as I tell them, they’ll say “okay I hope you find someone” then that’s the end of the conversation and the possibility for romance.

‘It’s all about looks and not personality these days,’ she said.

‘I thought people would say ”’you’re still you”, “it’s just you”.’

Lynn believes her painful break-up six months ago has had an impact on her hair follicles.

‘I think it was years of really bad relationships and that last one has tipped me over the edge,’ she said.

‘These dating sites are full of idiots anyway – to get to them to understand this condition is a bit too much.

‘Hopefully there’ll be someone somewhere who does understand it.’

Alopecia areata can be triggered by stress. US board-certified dermatologist  Dr. Dr. Hamdan Abdullah Hamed, who is the co-founder of PowerYourCurls.com, an online platform dedicated to provided natural hair care solutions, tells Metro.co.uk that stress, like a bad breakup, could be a factor in Lynn’s alopecia.

Meanwhile Dr. Alka Patel, a GP, says that stress, like a relationship breakdown, can ‘trigger a series of physiological responses with intricate hormonal implications’. Cortisol is one of the ‘primary’ hormones affected by stress. 

‘The intricate interplay between stress, heightened cortisol, altered testosterone levels, and hyperinsulinemia can foster a pro-inflammatory environment within the body,’ she tells Metro.co.uk.

‘Chronic inflammation, a common consequence of prolonged stress, not only affects systemic health but also interferes with the normal hair growth cycle.

‘Stress-induced inflammation can also trigger autoimmunity and conditions such as alopecia areata’.

MORE : My husband and I are the reason our baby was born without arms

MORE : ‘I wanted to rip my skin off after my shingles took over my body’

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Booking a ’90 day dinner’ could help you get some much needed perspective https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/21/booking-a-90-day-dinner-help-get-perspective-19855967/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/21/booking-a-90-day-dinner-help-get-perspective-19855967/#respond Tue, 21 Nov 2023 14:56:03 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19855967
Two Friends Hugging During A Dinner Celebration
A problem shared… (Picture: Getty Images)

From break ups to work woes, when you’re going through something big, it’s hard to see the wood from the trees.

You can’t imagine a time when whatever it is that’s happening won’t feel life altering-ly huge.

It’s always important to try and gain a little perspective, and that’s where the 90 day dinner comes in.

Introduced by TikToker Bec, who goes by @queer_quarterback on the video sharing platform, she explained the concept of the 90 day dinner.

‘If one of us is feeling in a funk, if something really sh*tty has happened, if we find ourselves in a break up or lost our job, or it doesn’t even have to be that – it could just be like generally anxiety or a feeling of stuckness, we can call a 90 day dinner,’ Bec said.

Bec explains that she and her friends will text their group chat simply saying that they need to schedule in a ’90 day’.

She continued: ‘And we all look at our calendars and go three months out and mark it in the calendar that it’s Becky’s 90 day dinner.

‘The purpose of the 90 day dinner is to provide perspective. So basically, at the time that you’re calling the 90 day dinner things are feeling bad. You’re like: ‘I can’t imagine a time when I’m not going to be feeling this way’, and by the 90 day dinner the idea is that something will have shifted.

‘If you’re going through a break up, in all likelihood you’re going to still feel some type of way… but there always will have been a shift of some kind.

‘Either you’ll be able to see if from a new angle, or there’ll be new information that’s been presented in that time.

‘Maybe something else in your life has started going really well and so you feel a little more removed from the intensity of the feelings you had when you called the 90 day.’

Bec said that the dinners help her recognise that the emotions she’s feeling at the time will pass.

‘And I think this idea of emotional permanence is really productive to shed…helping us understand that the feelings we’re having: discomfort, sadness, anger, frustration… they’re fleeting. They will change.’

And it’s a concept that experts say has value too.

Dr Rina Bajaj, counselling psychologist and author of The Magic in Me says taking time to adjust to major life changes is crucial for emotional wellbeing.

‘It allows individuals to acknowledge their experiences, learn from challenges, and cultivate a positive mindset as they move forward,’ she says.

‘Big life changes, such as a move, career transition, or relationship shift, often require time for adjustment. A 90-day period allows individuals to settle into their new circumstances, establish routines, and adapt to the changes.’

It’s worth pointing out of course that the 90 day dinner doesn’t mean you keep your feelings to yourself for three months – but having a designated time in the future to specifically reflect with friends important.

‘It encourages reflection on the progress made during the adjustment period,’ Dr Rina says. ‘It provides an opportunity to appreciate achievements, no matter how small, and acknowledge the efforts put into adapting to the new situation.

Sharing this celebration with others, whether friends, family, or colleagues, fosters a sense of camaraderie and connection. It allows individuals to discuss their experiences, gain support, and strengthen relationships during times of change. Celebrating accomplishments within the 90-day timeframe can serve as positive reinforcement. It reinforces resilience, adaptability, and the ability to navigate change successfully.’

And, as Bec points out, if you don’t have a big group of friends, a one-on-one chat can be just as valuable.

‘You can do this with your mum, you can do it with your cousin, with one buddy.

‘That experience of having at least one person who is clued into a challenge in your life and can help you recognise the growth that occurs over those 90 days is so beautiful.’

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

MORE : TikTok’s R.E.P.O.R.T is the self-care trend you can actually get on board with this winter

MORE : I was a cancer wellness guru teaching positivity — then my dad died

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TikTok’s R.E.P.O.R.T is the self-care trend you can actually get on board with this winter https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/21/tiktoks-r-e-p-o-r-t-self-care-practice-actually-stick-19854082/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/21/tiktoks-r-e-p-o-r-t-self-care-practice-actually-stick-19854082/#respond Tue, 21 Nov 2023 11:11:05 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19854082
It helps you romanticise your life (Picture: TikTok @lolaokola; @_gloyoyo_; @jamielynkane)
It helps you romanticise your life (Picture: TikTok @lolaokola; @_gloyoyo_; @jamielynkane)

From mindfulness planners, meditation and silent retreats, TikTokers often share their hacks for wellbeing and good mental health.

But for many of us, the reality of life often gets in the way. The daily gratitude dairy falls away, and an attempt to follow a meditation podcast while desperately trying to block out the sound of your kids/traffic/next door’s dog ends up leaving us more stressed.

But this latest TikTok trend is simple, easy and, importantly, fun.

Enter the daily (or weekly) R.E.P.O.R.T, where creators show what they’ve been up to by sharing what they’re Reading, Eating, Playing, Obsessed with, Recommending and Treating themselves to.

For example, Gooseweek, the creator who started the trend, said she was obsessed with her best friends, and has treated herself to a cross-country flight, to visit her family for Thanksgiving.

Meanwhile, Lola Okola (the TikToker behind Rat Girl Summer) has been reading The Feminist Killjoy Handbook by Sara Ahmed, and has been playing N.E.R.D. Creator Jamie Lyn Kane had been recommending a new lipstick combination.

Your daily R.E.P.O.R.T on TikTok could help make winter more bearable. Report shared by @jamielynkane https://www.tiktok.com/@jamielynkane/video/7282414535632358699
TikToker Jamie has been sharing her love of Pilates lately (Picture: @jamielynkane)

Metro.co.uk recently spoke to future work specialist and executive coach, Harriet Minter, about how millennials and gen z can no longer afford the lifestyle experienced by older generations.

As such, they’re ‘romanticising’ their lives – appreciating the small things, now that the big things (like home ownership and foreign holidays) are that much harder to come by – the R.E.P.O.R.T is yet another example of this.

And psychologist, Emma Kenny, told Metro.co.uk that this trend could encourage us to focus on the positives, during an often challenging time of year for many.

What does TikTok's R.E.P.O.R.T stand for?

R – Reading

E – Eating

P – Playing

O – Obsessed With

R – Reccomending

T – Treating

She says: ‘Sharing your R.E.P.O.R.T allows individuals to focus on the positive aspects of their lives and share them, as well as provide a distraction from the stressors of life.

‘While it’s important to note that excessive social comparison can be detrimental, for the viewer, seeing others’ recommendations and self-care routines can inspire viewers to adopt healthier habits or seek out enjoyable activities, promoting personal growth and well-being.’

Emma says this trend also fosters a sense of community.

Your daily R.E.P.O.R.T on TikTok could help make winter more bearable. Report shared by @lolaokola https://www.tiktok.com/@lolaokola/video/7297376122776390954
Treat yo’self (Picture: @lolaokola)

‘The comment sections of these R.E.P.O.R.T.S often become a space where viewers share their own experiences and offer support and advice to each other.

‘For instance, if a creator talks about how they’ve been journaling lately, viewers may chime in with tips on journaling techniques or personal anecdotes of how journaling helped them cope.’

There’s other positives too. ‘It can inspire a sense of resilience,’ says Emma.

‘When a creator discusses their commitment to daily exercise as a means to boost mood and built resilience, for example, viewers might be encouraged to incorporate physical activity into their routines, which can enhance their mental and emotional well-being.

Your daily R.E.P.O.R.T on TikTok could help make winter more bearable. Report shared by @jamielynkane https://www.tiktok.com/@jamielynkane/video/7282414535632358699
Daisy Jones And The Six was Jamie’s book recommended (Picture @jamielynkane)

‘Creators also often share various strategies they employ to deal with stress, sadness, or uncertainty.

‘For instance, they might discuss how they’ve found solace in reading self-help books during difficult times. Viewers can then discover new coping strategies or resources to help them navigate their own challenges.’

With the temperature dropping and the nights drawing in, it seems this particular trend that encourages gratitude and positivity has come at the perfect time.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

MORE : Joining a weekly five-a-side cured my loneliness

MORE : I’m a YouTuber with 1.4million subscribers — people underestimate the pressure

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Unable to cope with my diabetes diagnosis, I tried to take my life https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/21/unable-cope-diabetes-diagnosis-tried-take-life-19848495/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/21/unable-cope-diabetes-diagnosis-tried-take-life-19848495/#respond Tue, 21 Nov 2023 09:45:52 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19848495
Natalie laying on a wooden decking, her eyes are closed and she's smiling, with one hand in her curly black hair
When I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes I thought my life was over (Picture: Natalie Balmain)

‘I’m about to turn 21, I have my whole life ahead of me, but the life I thought I’d have is gone.’ 

That was the prevailing thought I kept having right after being diagnosed with type 1 diabetes in 2007. 

I just couldn’t cope that this was my new reality.

As a result, I experienced a nervous breakdown, trashed my room and then my housemates found me trying to hurt myself. They immediately rang my dad for help and he called 999. 

It was the lowest point in my life.

Thankfully, I’m in a much better place now and I actually think my diagnosis is the best thing that ever happened to me.

I first began to experience the awful symptoms of undiagnosed diabetes during my time at university.

Focused on lectures and essays, I had no idea my immune system had destroyed the insulin-producing cells in my pancreas and that was what was causing my dramatic weight loss, blurred vision and unquenchable thirst.

I partied over Christmas and New Year, and by the time I went home to see my family in the early new year, I looked so thin that my family thought I was anorexic and so they rushed me to see my GP.

Natalie kneeling on the floor in a photoshoot with a dark grey background, she is wearing a short black dress and black boots. You can see her glucose monitors on her arm and leg.
I decided to attempt suicide (Picture: Fernando Sippel and Dexcom)

Stepping on the scales, that’s when we all discovered I weighed just six stone. This then led to a finger prick test, which showed that my sugar levels were way over the normal amount, and so I was sent to hospital.

A nurse in hospital did an artery blood test, which I remember her telling me would hurt, and not long after my diagnosis was confirmed, I was put on a saline drip to help bring my blood glucose down and started on insulin injections immediately.

‘You’ll need to do this every day for the rest of your life,’ she explained, though in all honesty it didn’t sink in at that point just how life altering this diagnosis would be.

Of course I had heard of diabetes, but I didn’t know anyone personally that had it.

Nor did I understand the difference between type 1 – which is when the pancreas can no longer make insulin as a result of your immune system attacking the cells – and type 2 – when the body becomes resistant to insulin. That knowledge came much later.

The only thing I do remember asking was: ‘Why me?’ Doctor’s couldn’t give me an answer though.

Type 1 diabetes is an autoimmune condition – like lupus, or psoriasis – there is no widely accepted cause and it cannot be prevented. It’s just bad luck and can happen to anyone at any time in their life.

Natalie Balmain sitting in front of the Thames, with the city in the background. She is wearing a denim boat, plaid skirt and Nike shoes.
It was the lowest point in my life (Picture: Natalie Balmain)

Now, it was clearly my turn.

When I returned to university, I wanted nothing more than for things to go back to normal. But they couldn’t.

I had to cut out alcohol and partying as it caused my sugars to drop too low meaning I’d start shaking, sweating and not being able to see, which in turn meant my group of friends stopped calling.

I felt isolated. Alone. And with seemingly no way out, that’s when I decided to attempt suicide.

Back in hospital I was kept overnight, but emergency wards are not designed for people in mental health crisis and I was discharged the next day because I wasn’t physically in need of A&E treatment.

I went back to my student house with very little support. 

Luckily, my flatmates were there to try and help me, but I sensed they weren’t really sure what to do. 

More from Platform

Platform is the home of Metro.co.uk's first-person and opinion pieces, devoted to giving a platform to underheard and underrepresented voices in the media.

Find some of our best reads of the week below:

Will Castle shares the moment he found out his father had taken his own life from a traffic update on the radio.

Executive Chairman of Iceland Foods, Richard Walker, explains why his family's company are ditching their Christmas advert this year to help their customers.

Joy Munns' parents Mavis and Dennis were married for 60 years and very much in love, but when they both tried to kill themselves following Dennis's terminal diagnosis, Mavis was put on trial for his murder.

And finally, an anonymous bridesmaid recounts being subjected to constant demands by her bridezilla friend. She was left ghosted and with massive bills to pay.

I graduated not long after somehow, but as my knowledge has grown over the years, I look back at the girl I was then and feel sorry for her – I really was just muddling my way through and I was scraping by. 

I got a job as a PA in Manchester as that was all I could really cope with, and I did my best, but for the first four years I would say I was just existing rather than living.

There were lots of other challenges other than just keeping myself alive. 

I had lost so much weight when I was unwell that I had lost muscle mass as well as fat. It took years of work to get this back but in the meantime my confidence was destroyed.

It’s very easy to develop disordered eating when you have to focus so much on your food and insulin intake anyway. 

Natalie in a photoshoot with a dark grey background, she is wearing a short black dress and we can see her glucose monitor on her leg. Her hand is in her hair and she's smiling widely.
A lifeline came in 2007 when I saw a diabetes specialist nurse (Picture: Fernando Sippel and Dexcom)

I struggled with diabulimia for a while – a now recognised eating disorder where people with type 1 diabetes stop taking their insulin even though doing so might kill them, because stopping means you will lose weight. 

At that time though it wasn’t really widely known, and I had to deal with that myself over the course of the next few years.

A lifeline came in 2007 when I saw a diabetes specialist nurse for an appointment and just broke down at how much I was struggling. 

She recognised my complete lack of knowledge of my own condition and put me on a carb counting course – where you spend five days in hospital learning about your own dosing needs and how to calculate your doses based on the amount of carbohydrates you consume. 

It was a big step in the right direction, and definitely changed the course of my life with diabetes and started me off on my education journey.

The first thing it taught me was how to properly look after myself and how to accurately measure my insulin dose. But it also introduced me to other type 1s for the first time.

Sitting in a room full of other people like me was life-changing. Just being able to talk to someone else who is going through the same things you are made me feel less alone and less panicked about all the little challenges.

Relishing in that peer support that I’d been missing for so long, I then connected with the type 1 community online, and it was the amazing friends I made there that inspired me to want to give something back.

Ten years on from my diagnosis I created Type 1 Clothing – a fashion line which includes everything from dresses and jumpsuits to partywear, all designed with zips and splits to make it easier to inject insulin while in public.

Model wearing a grey hoodie with zips on the arms
I created Type 1 Clothing (Picture: Supplied)

Then, last year, I took part in the Channel 4 competition style reality show, Make Me Prime Minister (think, The Apprentice, but for politics) where I competed against 11 other candidates under the watch of Alastair Campbell and Baroness Sayeeda Warsi. 

And I won!

I couldn’t believe it, but it meant the world to be able to show others (and prove to myself) that you don’t have to let diabetes stop you from going after your dreams.

Since then I’ve also been asked to appear alongside celebrities like global star Nick Jonas and actor Jeremy Irvine in a first-of-its-kind digital portrait exhibit on SeeDiabetes.com in celebration of World Diabetes Day.

The images capture some of the raw emotions I have experienced living with diabetes that often go unseen. And they’ll also show the world the amazing diabetes management technology I wear that supports me, day and night.

I am fortunate to be able to use a hybrid closed loop (HCL) system, which is made up of two separate devices that both monitor my glucose levels and deliver my insulin. There’s even a special AI algorithm that learns my personal patterns and adjusts my dosage accordingly.

It really has been a life changing piece of kit for me. Instead of pricking my finger multiple times a day, I can, more or less, leave it to do its thing – though I do still need to enter the carbs I eat and let it know if I’m going to exercise (yes that includes hoovering!).

While type 1 diabetes is incurable, it can be so much easier to manage now and I truly hope more people with diabetes have the opportunity to use this technology to manage their diabetes soon.

When I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes I thought my life was over. But now, I’m part of a worldwide community and have had opportunities far greater than I ever could have imagined.

And to anyone diagnosed with diabetes now or in the future just remember, you are not alone because we have each other.

Natalie is a supporter of Dexcom’s #SeeDiabetes campaign

Need support?

For emotional support you can call the Samaritans 24-hour helpline on 116 123, email jo@samaritans.org, visit a Samaritans branch in person or go to the Samaritans website.

If you’re a young person, or concerned about a young person, you can also contact PAPYRUS Prevention of Young Suicide UK. Their HOPELINK digital support platform is open 24/7, or you can call 0800 068 4141, text 07860039967 or email: pat@papyrus-uk.org between the hours of 9am and midnight.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing jess.austin@metro.co.uk

Share your views in the comments below.

MORE : Millions of people have undiagnosed diabetes – now a smartphone can help

MORE : Glucose-based targets may ‘change treatment’ for those with prediabetes

MORE : A simple – enjoyable – everyday habit can slash the risk of type 2 diabetes

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Getting my first passport at 61 was a significant step in my recovery https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/20/getting-first-passport-61-helped-feel-alive-19758468/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/20/getting-first-passport-61-helped-feel-alive-19758468/#respond Mon, 20 Nov 2023 10:25:36 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19758468
Frankie smiling to the camera
I didn’t know how to grieve (Picture: Frankie Feeney)

Walking into an airport for the first time back in March made me feel like a kid at Christmas.

I never thought I’d go abroad, so it was mind-blowing to get on a plane.

Later, when I was sailing down the Vltava River in Prague with my partner, gazing up at all the beautiful buildings, I couldn’t believe my luck.

For once, I felt grateful to be alive.

Which felt incredible, given that just six months ago, aged 61, I’d been in such a dark place that I’d wanted to take my own life.

I was brought up not to talk about my feelings – that boys didn’t cry. My parents showed me tough love and my father was a very disciplined man.

I was born into a deprived neighbourhood and there was a lot of lawlessness in the area. Men were hard, big drinkers and fighters. You had to fit in to survive.

So, I became like them – even though I didn’t really feel like that was who I was inside.

Then, when I was 27, I lost my baby daughter to Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

I felt like I couldn’t show or talk about my feelings, so I kept them all bottled up and started drinking more to cope. I was devastated but couldn’t express how I was feeling because I didn’t really know how to. I felt, as a man, I had to be strong.

I didn’t know how to grieve.

I felt numb and disconnected, which affected my relationship with my family. I wouldn’t talk to them and instead, pushed them away.

Frankie Feeney and his partner standing in front of a road with some architecturally unique buildings in the background, in a city, both smiling at the camera.
I told my partner about what I was going through (Picture: Frankie Feeney)

I just about managed to get from one day to the next. Then, in 2009, my older brother died by suicide, and I spiralled out of control.

I felt grief, anger, guilt that my brother had died by suicide and I wasn’t able to prevent it – it triggered all my feelings from when my daughter died.

The dark feelings were so overwhelming it was difficult to cope with them, so I tried to numb myself by drinking. My life was unmanageable, I felt a constant sense of doom that something bad was going to happen.

I felt like a black cloud was hanging over me all the time.

Eventually, I went to rehab in 2011 when I was 50. I later got a job there, distracting myself by looking after other people.

Need support?

For emotional support you can call the Samaritans 24-hour helpline on 116 123, email jo@samaritans.org, visit a Samaritans branch in person or go to the Samaritans website.

If you're a young person, or concerned about a young person, you can also contact PAPYRUS Prevention of Young Suicide UK. Their HOPELINK digital support platform is open 24/7, or you can call 0800 068 4141, text 07860039967 or email: pat@papyrus-uk.org between the hours of 9am and midnight.

But I was still really struggling. I was angry and grieving, suffering from devastating flashbacks about my daughter and brother dying. My mental health was at rock bottom.

More and more, I thought about taking my own life. How much easier it would be if I wasn’t here to have to deal with all of these horrific thoughts. In September 2022, these thoughts became overwhelming and I started to put a plan in place.

I thought about how I would do it, how much of a relief it would be to be gone. The only thing that stopped me from going ahead was the thought of the pain I would cause the person who found me.

Frankie Feeney: Researching suicide online as an older man
My feelings of self-worth grew (Picture: Frankie Feeney)

I told my partner about what I was going through, and she was very worried about me. She encouraged me to go to the doctor to tell him how I was feeling and they referred me to a charity called James’ Place.

I’d imagined a clinical place, with white walls and plastic chairs, but it was totally different. I was met with a smile, the building itself was calming and relaxing, and there was a beautiful garden in the back.

I instantly felt safe.

Soon, I had my first session with a therapist and broke down.

All the feelings I’d kept in for so many years, about my childhood, my daughter and brother dying, finally all came pouring out.

It was such a relief to say it all aloud to someone after so long, and for them to help me make sense of it all.

What aids your mental health? Have your say in the comments belowComment Now

I had weekly therapy for two months and in that time, I felt a real change in myself. My feelings of self-worth grew, I felt more in control of my thoughts, and I realised that suicide wasn’t the answer.

That I did have a future to look forward to.

With my therapist, I worked on a safety plan, which I now keep beside my bed, with what to do if I ever felt that way again – things to watch out for, things that help me calm myself (like long walks), places I can go to and who to talk to – my partner is the first person I’d tell if I was struggling again and I also have helpline numbers I can ring.

As I was coming to the end of my treatment, I started talking with my partner about going on holiday. I’d never been abroad before, or felt that interested, but I felt so much more positive and wanted to step out of my comfort zone – so, I applied for a passport, aged 61.

Frankie Feeney sitting at a cafe outside, holding chips in a paper cone, smiling at the camera.
I’d been in such a dark place (Picture: Frankie Feeney)
Frankie Feeney and his partner, sitting at a restaurant inside. Their table is by a window, they're holding hands on the table and smiling at the camera.
I’m living my best life to the best of my ability (Picture: Frankie Feeney)

A few weeks later we went to Prague. I enjoyed it so much that we went away again to Krakow and soon we’re going on my first beach holiday to Spain. I’m really making up for lost time!

I feel more positive about life in general, my feelings of self-esteem and self-worth have grown, I am processing and dealing with my grief rather than trying to suppress it.

I walk a lot now and try to help others who are feeling the same way by sharing my experiences. I’m living my best life to the best of my ability. I still have down days but I am better than I’ve ever been.

I feel like I can finally be myself.

More from Platform

Platform is the home of Metro.co.uk's first-person and opinion pieces, devoted to giving a platform to underheard and underrepresented voices in the media.

Find some of our best reads of the week below:

Will Castle shares the moment he found out his father had taken his own life from a traffic update on the radio.

Executive Chairman of Iceland Foods, Richard Walker, explains why his family's company are ditching their Christmas advert this year to help their customers.

Joy Munns' parents Mavis and Dennis were married for 60 years and very much in love, but when they both tried to kill themselves following Dennis's terminal diagnosis, Mavis was put on trial for his murder.

And finally, an anonymous bridesmaid recounts being subjected to constant demands by her bridezilla friend. She was left ghosted and with massive bills to pay.

Men have the highest suicide rate, accounting for three quarters of all suicides in the UK. I think it’s because we don’t feel able to talk because we don’t want to be seen as weak – men, especially my generation, don’t speak about feeling or emotions from where I come from.

Believe me, it’s so important to talk to someone – and not to keep it to yourself. Even when you are at rock bottom, there’s still hope for the future.

I didn’t think I would still be here now, but I got the right help and it’s been life-changing.

Suicidal men in London or the North West can access free, life-saving treatment from James’ Place www.jamesplace.org.uk

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing jess.austin@metro.co.uk

Share your views in the comments below.

MORE : ‘The heaviness of losing my son to suicide will never leave me’

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MORE : AI breakthrough for treatment-resistant depression

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I was a cancer wellness guru teaching positivity — then my dad died https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/19/kris-carr-i-a-wellness-guru-teaching-positivity-dad-died-19840268/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/19/kris-carr-i-a-wellness-guru-teaching-positivity-dad-died-19840268/#respond Sun, 19 Nov 2023 09:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19840268
cancer wellness guru Kris Carr
Kris Carr built a career as a wellness guru after her cancer diagnosis (Picture: Bill Miles)

In her early 30s, and living in New York, Kris Carr was living the ‘burning the candle at both ends’ lifestyle that so often comes with living and working in a big city.

A film and theatre actress, she was working on and off Broadway, and had just been chosen to appear in a Bud Light advert that would air in one of the coveted half time slots of the Super Bowl

She confesses she didn’t exactly put her health first, fuelled mainly by coffee and energy bars in between auditions.

But one morning in 2003, Kris woke up feeling particularly terrible. ‘I felt like I’d been hit by a truck,’ she says. ‘I went to the doctor with stiff muscles, shortness of breath and severe abdominal cramping.’

Her doctor thought it was an issue with her gallbladder and sent her for an ultrasound to confirm his diagnosis. Only, he was wrong. Medics spotted ‘lesions’ on Kris’ liver.

‘I didn’t know that lesions mean cancer,’ says Kris. On 14 February 2003, she was diagnosed with a rare kind of vascular cancer in the lining of her blood arteries, liver and lungs called epithelioid hemangioendothelioma (EHE). It affects just 0.01% of cancer patients – it’s slow growing but there’s no cure. 

Kris says she felt like she ‘had been punched in the stomach by God’.

‘Cancer is such a frightening word. How could this be happening to me? Cancer happened to other people. I was young and vibrant. I felt like I was staring down the barrel of a gun, waiting to find out how many bullets were inside.’

One doctor suggested that they ‘watch and wait’, which isn’t unusual for EHE patients. With this specific type of cancer, chemotherapy and radiotherapy aren’t offered from the off, as EHE tumours can remain dormant for long periods and even shrink without intervention. Instead, the doctor suggested Kris focussed on boosting her immune system – advice she grabbed with both hands.

‘Someone gave me a book on improving your diet and I started to research the link between nutrition and healing,’ she says. ‘I went 100% vegan, drank a lot of smoothies and juices, researched macrobiotics and a raw diet – and I felt fantastic.’

cancer wellness guru Kris Carr
Kris says she ‘felt fantastic’ despsite the stage 4 cancer diagnosis (Picture: Bill Miles)

Although it’s important to note that lifestyle and mindset changes can’t cure cancer (and this idea would be very dangerous for some forms of the disease), for Kris’ EHE, it seemed the changes helped. 

‘I would be scanned every month and the tumours remained stable,’ she says.

Kris also worked on her mindset. She checked into a New Mexico Zen monastery for a summer, learning meditation techniques and how to feel more ‘in touch’ with herself. 

In the years that followed, she began to dedicate her life to wellness, encouraging others to lean into a positive thinking – no matter what life throws at you.

She became a New York Times best-selling author, with Oprah featuring her on her Supersoul 100, as one of her most influential wellness thought leaders in the world. 

After making a documentary about her cancer, Crazy Sexy Cancer, she met and fell in love with the editor, and they married in 2006. Two decades on from the diagnosis, Kris still lives with cancer. 

‘My disease remained stable. It served as a constant reminder to me to take better care of myself,’ she says. ‘Cancer is my teacher. I don’t always like what it has to say, but I listen anyway.’

But in 2008, Kris, now 52, was dealt yet another blow, when her father became unwell with pancreatic cancer.

Kris’ biological dad had left her mum when she was conceived. When her dad, who adopted her when she was a child, lay dying, Kris’s grief felt overwhelming. 

‘When my father was dying, my world was falling apart, and I was on the verge of reaching my 20-year milestone of living with cancer – I suddenly lost the energy to run,’ she says.

Kris with her beloved dad (Picture: Kris Carr)
Kris with her beloved dad (Picture: Kris Carr)

‘My go-to tools to keep my shit together were failing. At some point, even my wellness practices started to feel like I was just leaning on hollow platitudes to cover up the depths of pain and fear felt.

‘After Dad died my bandwidth for ‘normal’ was next to nothing. I literally thought there was something wrong with me as I struggled to get out of bed,’ she says.

For the first time in years, Kris’ perspective changed. ‘I tried something different,’ she says. ‘I stopped and faced my feelings’. 

Though she still values positivity, Kris turned to therapy to navigate deeper feelings and began researching how grief and other difficult emotions affect our brains, bodies and lives. 

‘I slowly and gently started applying the practices, insights and therapies I was discovering to ease my own pain, and over time, I eventually began to feel better – not cured but better,’ she says. 

Some of these practices she mentions included talk therapy – ‘both grief and trauma need to be witnessed’; somatic experiencing (a body-based approach to healing trauma and stressed related disorders); EMDR, which stands for eye movement desensitisation and reprocessing, orginally developed to treat symptoms associated with trauma and post-traumatic stress disorder; and EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) also known as ‘tapping’.

Her latest book, I’m Not A Mourning Person: Braving Loss, Grief, And The Big Messy Emotions that Happen When Life Falls Apart, gives ideas and questions to explore for anyone who may be struggling. It’s not just for those dealing with grief, but with those other overwhelming emotions such as fear, doubt, anxiety, hopelessness.

I'm Not A Mourning Peron book, by Kris Carr
I’m Not A Mourning Peron, by Kris Carr (Picture: Supplied)

Rather than running from the pain, Kris invites us to stop and feel it, asking questions like: What is going on in my body when I feel anxious or hopeless? What can I do to support myself right now? What needs to change in my relationship to work? 

‘The old adage is that you can’t go over, you have to go through it,’ says Kris. ‘Your emotions are messengers, and they are telling you something. It may feel easier to deny or bury whatever big, messy feelings threaten to overwhelm you but when we’re brave enough to translate the messengers, we can stop running and be free.’

Kris has adopted her grandmother’s motto: Don’t curse the darkness, light a candle. ‘While there may be not getting over grief, there is moving forward and moving through,’ she says. ‘My invitation is, whatever crossroads you find yourself at, connect more deeply with yourself and do what matters in your life.’

What to do when life falls apart, according to Kris Carr

Get support before you think you need it. When you find yourself facing a life crisis it’s Ok to ask for help and start lining up support. To tell people what’s happening and let them know that you may need a hand along the way.

Ask ‘what’ instead of ‘why’

Life is full of uncertainties. And we may never know the uncertainties for some of the challenging situations we face. Rather than assigning blame and dwelling on the past, remember that it’s more productive to focus on taking care of our mental and physical health in the present moment. Instead of asking ‘why’, focus on what we can do now.

Try talk therapy: Both grief and trauma need to be witnessed, and one of the most healing things we can do for ourselves and others is to tell our stories. Tell your story.

Kris Carr’s I’m Not A Mourning Person: Braving Loss, Grief, And The Big Messy Emotions that Happen When Life Falls Apart is out now.

MORE : I was single for 10 years — then I cracked the code for online dating

MORE : We moved to a commune when I was 7 months pregnant

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I learned the hard way what present you shouldn’t give a person with cancer https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/18/learned-hard-way-present-not-give-a-person-cancer-19799503/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/18/learned-hard-way-present-not-give-a-person-cancer-19799503/#respond Sat, 18 Nov 2023 14:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19799503
Anikka sitting on her dining table with a laptop, there is a vase of flowers in front of her
I realised that there was nowhere to find appropriate gifts for people with serious illnesses (Picture: Anikka Burton)

I put another freshly delivered bunch of flowers into a saucepan, having long since run out of vases and pint glasses.

After finding out I had cancer, friends and loved ones clearly wanted to show they cared – and flowers were the ‘go-to’ option.

The life changing diagnosis had come on a Monday in May 2011 and the cancer was already large, aggressive and had spread to my lymph nodes. 

It took me five months to be diagnosed after I felt a mass in my left breast. 

I was dismissed at first – I was told I was too young to have breast cancer and that it was probably mastitis or hormonal.

When all was revealed, I was terrified and convinced I would die. I’d lost my mum to breast cancer.

My world imploded and my future, previously mapped out – I was recently married, had moved to the countryside with a new job and was planning for a family – suddenly became uncertain.

I started my first session of chemotherapy on the Friday after diagnosis, in an attempt to shrink the tumours and make surgery possible.

Anikka at hospital having treatment for her cancer - she is smiling to camera while wearing a head cap
There was something a bit sad about being surrounded by wilting blooms (Picture: Anikka Burton)

When you are diagnosed with breast cancer at the young age of 33, there are so many unique issues to face, such as the cancer being more aggressive with a worse prognosis, being plunged into an early menopause and the treatment affecting your fertility. 

There was so much to try and get my head around.

Chemo was tough but manageable. The fatigue and nausea were relentless, but I rested as much as possible.

It was then the flower deliveries started rolling in. 

I love flowers and was so grateful for the accompanying messages of love and support.

But there were so many that I ran out of vases and pots to put them in.

There was also something a bit sad about being surrounded by wilting blooms when you are facing a life-threatening illness – it was a visual reminder of how fragile life is.

When I went into hospital for my surgery, in October, I was also sent numerous bunches there. But flowers are banned on most wards, so I didn’t even get to see them.

It felt like such a waste.

Anikka is sitting on her bed, wearing all black and hugging her dog
I was told I was too young to have breast cancer (Picture: Anikka Burton)

Other people in the online cancer forums were also saying the same thing. 

My house looks like a funeral parlour, there’s so many bunches of flowers, one person joked.

Lying on my sofa as I recovered from my mastectomy, looking at drooping petals, I realised that there was nowhere to find appropriate gifts for people with serious illnesses.

Don’t get me wrong, flowers are lovely, but nobody needs more than a few bunches.

But what else could people pick? Toiletries can be tricky with people having, or choosing to, avoid various ingredients such as parabens, sulphates and fragrances.

More from Platform

Platform is the home of Metro.co.uk's first-person and opinion pieces, devoted to giving a platform to underheard and underrepresented voices in the media.

Find some of our best reads of the week below:

Will Castle shares the moment he found out his father had taken his own life from a traffic update on the radio.

Executive Chairman of Iceland Foods, Richard Walker, explains why his family's company are ditching their Christmas advert this year to help their customers.

Joy Munns' parents Mavis and Dennis were married for 60 years and very much in love, but when they both tried to kill themselves following Dennis's terminal diagnosis, Mavis was put on trial for his murder.

And finally, an anonymous bridesmaid recounts being subjected to constant demands by her bridezilla friend. She was left ghosted and with massive bills to pay.

Some cancer patients may choose to avoid sugar and dairy or lose their appetites completely during treatment, meaning tasty treats can also be difficult.

Practical support is the most appreciated, but if you live too far away to help out in person this is challenging.

So, while feeling grotty and lying on the sofa, an idea grew and I started making a list of gifts I would have found useful during treatment. 

And that was how, in October 2013, Not Another Bunch Of Flowers was born – a website selling thoughtful gift alternatives to flowers.

I started with chemo care packages, hospital hampers, get well gifts and gifts for new mums. These included gifts that were welcome and useful in hospitals like pretty eye masks, cosy bed socks, edible treats, mini toiletries, nightwear and books.

Anikka standing in front of shelves of boxes, holing a cardboard box that reads
I started making a list of gifts I would have found useful during treatment (Picture: Anikka Burton)

Not Another Bunch Of Flowers quickly grew to offer thoughtful gifts for all occasions – birthdays, seasonal gifts etc.

Following six months of chemotherapy, five operations, a double mastectomy, a month of radiotherapy and a year of targeted therapy, I had tests to see what effect the treatments had on my fertility.

I was given the devastating news that the chemo had left me infertile and I would never be able to have children. 

I was utterly heartbroken, but threw myself into my little business, which became my baby. 

Over the years I have felt very honoured to have been able to use my experience to help others who have just been diagnosed or to offer advice and comfort to the families whose loved ones are going through cancer.

Anikka wearing a beanie, gloves, thick cardigan and scarf, standing outside holding her baby bump.
I was told I would never be able to have children (Picture: Anikka Burton)

I often get messages from people asking for personal advice – everything from how to manage menopausal symptoms, what products helped me during treatment, to different reconstruction options.

I’ve also partnered with a number of charities over the years in recognition of the support I received during my own treatment.

I am still doing well (touch wood) and, after 12 years, will hopefully be able to finish my hormone medication soon.

I will never be given the ‘all clear’, the best I can hope for is ‘no evidence of disease’.

There’s always the fear that the cancer will return and I have had many scans over the years and lost many breast cancer buddies along the way.

But there has been light. 

The doctors were wrong.

In 2017 I had my miracle baby boy.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing jess.austin@metro.co.uk

Share your views in the comments below.

MORE : Strictly’s Amy Dowden ‘cried all morning’ ahead of final chemo treatment for breast cancer

MORE : Did you know about the breast cancer vaccine? Until I got it, neither did I

MORE : Massive breakthrough in breast cancer treatment that costs just 4p a day

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Sisters almost die within days of each other due to using wrong kind of tampon https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/18/sisters-fight-lives-due-super-plus-tampon-19842731/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/18/sisters-fight-lives-due-super-plus-tampon-19842731/#respond Sat, 18 Nov 2023 11:33:45 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19842731
The sisters, Jaya Johnson and Devine Johnson, were left fighting for their lives (Picture: Kennedy News & Pics)
The sisters, Jaya Johnson and Devine Johnson, were left fighting for their lives (Picture: Kennedy News & Pics)

Two fit and healthy sisters were left fighting for their lives after using the same type of ‘super plus’ tampon.

Devine Johnson, 21, developed sepsis from toxic shock syndrome (TSS) caused by the period product.

Just 30 days later, her sister, Jaya, 17, developed the same infection and was also admitted to hospital.

Their devastated mum, Javon, 46, described the ordeal: ‘We honestly thought we were going to lose them.

‘My husband and I just stood there in shock.

‘We couldn’t believe this had actually happened to us again. What are the odds?’

PIC FROM KENNEDY NEWS AND MEDIA (PICTURED: DEVINE JOHNSON, 21, WHO DEVELOPED SEPTIC SHOCK FROM A TAMPON LAST YEAR) A mum has told how BOTH her daughters were almost killed within days of each other - when they both ended up in intensive care with septic shock infections after using 'super plus' tampons. Javon Johnson says her daughter Devine Johnson, 21, spent a week in intensive care after falling ill last year [May 26] - before learning she had developed sepsis from toxic shock syndrome (TSS) caused by a tampon. The 46-year-old feared she was going to lose her second-eldest daughter as she says her organs were at risk of shutting down. DISCLAIMER: While Kennedy News and Media uses its best endeavours to establish the copyright and authenticity of all pictures supplied, it accepts no liability for any damage, loss or legal action caused by the use of images supplied and the publication of images is solely at your discretion. SEE KENNEDY NEWS COPY - 0161 697 4266
Devine Johnson, 21, was the first to feel unwell (Picture: Kennedy News and Media)

TSS is an extremely rare infection – there are around 40 cases per year in the UK. It’s caused by a common bacteria that lives on the skin, and is usually harmless. But in some cases, the bacteria can produce toxins, which enter the bloodstream.

For TSS to occur, these particular types of bacteria must first over-grow and make large amounts of the TSS toxin, which then enters the bloodstream.

TSS can be caused when a tampon is left in for longer than recommended (every four to eight hours), or when a higher than needed absorbency is used.

Javon, from Indiana, USA, says her eldest daughter, Devine, had just finished her period in May 2022 when she came down with symptoms similar to a cold. She experienced nausea and a high fever.

But soon, she was unable to walk without help and two days later, ended up in the hospital.

After blood tests revealed Devine had septic shock, she was treated in an intensive care unit (ICU) for seven days. She was later told by the family doctor at a follow-up appointment that the infection was caused by a tampon.

But the family’s horror was far from over. Just a month later, Jaya – the second eldest sibling – also became unwell.

PIC FROM KENNEDY NEWS AND MEDIA (PICTURED: JAYA JOHNSON, 17, IN HOSPITAL WITH SEPTIC SHOCK IN FLORIDA) A mum has told how BOTH her daughters were almost killed within days of each other - when they both ended up in intensive care with septic shock infections after using 'super plus' tampons. Javon Johnson says her daughter Devine Johnson, 21, spent a week in intensive care after falling ill last year [May 26] - before learning she had developed sepsis from toxic shock syndrome (TSS) caused by a tampon. The 46-year-old feared she was going to lose her second-eldest daughter as she says her organs were at risk of shutting down. DISCLAIMER: While Kennedy News and Media uses its best endeavours to establish the copyright and authenticity of all pictures supplied, it accepts no liability for any damage, loss or legal action caused by the use of images supplied and the publication of images is solely at your discretion. SEE KENNEDY NEWS COPY - 0161 697 4266
Jaya Johnson, 17, became severely unwell after her sister (Picture: Kennedy News and Media)

The family were on holiday in Florida in early July when Jaya experienced similar symptoms to her sister, but Javon assumed it was down to heatstroke.

They took her to hospital, but Jaya was sent home with ibuprofen for a viral infection. It was only when she later passed out and was rushed back to hospital.

Javon says Jaya was on her period and had recently used a tampon for the first time – from the same box as her older sister.

‘She had only used tampons for the very first time in the last two days,’ says Javon. ‘She just wanted to use it to go swimming [on holiday].

‘The doctors said she had used the super plus absorbency when she didn’t need. They contain a different kind of chemical with a higher potency, and she shouldn’t have used that.’

Javon says watching both her daughters fight for their lives within a month of each other was devastating.

Javon said: ‘It was a deja vu moment when we got the same diagnosis for [Jaya] just 30 days later.

PIC FROM KENNEDY NEWS AND MEDIA (PICTURED: SISTERS DEVINE JOHNSON, 21, AND JAYA JOHSON, 17, ON HOLIDAY IN FLORIDA BEFORE JAYA FELL ILL) A mum has told how BOTH her daughters were almost killed within days of each other - when they both ended up in intensive care with septic shock infections after using 'super plus' tampons. Javon Johnson says her daughter Devine Johnson, 21, spent a week in intensive care after falling ill last year [May 26] - before learning she had developed sepsis from toxic shock syndrome (TSS) caused by a tampon. The 46-year-old feared she was going to lose her second-eldest daughter as she says her organs were at risk of shutting down. DISCLAIMER: While Kennedy News and Media uses its best endeavours to establish the copyright and authenticity of all pictures supplied, it accepts no liability for any damage, loss or legal action caused by the use of images supplied and the publication of images is solely at your discretion. SEE KENNEDY NEWS COPY - 0161 697 4266
The girls are now doing much better (Picture: Kennedy News and Media)

‘My husband and I were at the hospital around the clock. We could not leave her.

‘They were both in really bad shape. It was a touchy situation because their organs were inflamed and at risk of shutting down.

‘We were watching the monitors constantly.

What you need to know about sepsis

‘Poppy’s story is a stark reminder that Sepsis can affect anyone at any time.

‘Women during or immediately after pregnancy are at slightly increased risk of this life-threatening condition, which arises when the body’s response to an infection begins to cause organ damage.

‘It’s important that women who are pregnant are aware of sepsis and know what to do if they’re worried.

‘If you’re worried that you have an infection, and something doesn’t feel quite right or you’re getting worse rather than better, look for the following signs:

S for slurred speech or confusion

E for extreme pain in the muscles or joints

P for passing no urine in a day

S for severe breathlessness

I for “it feels like I’m going to die”

S for skin that’s mottled, discoloured or very pale

Any one of these six in the context of infection go straight to A&E.’

Dr Ron Daniels, BEMFounder and Joint CEO of UK Sepsis Trust

‘We just got one kid out of the ICU, who is still recovering, and now we’ve got another kid who was about to start this process again, but she looked worse.’

Javon explains that neither of her daughters diagnosis were due to the length of time they were using each tampon for.

‘They diagnosed Jaya while she was in the hospital because she was on her cycle but she did not have a tampon in,’ she explains.

‘Devine had always used them. I don’t know if it was this particular package, as they did use the same box.

PIC FROM KENNEDY NEWS AND MEDIA (PICTUREDJAVON JOHNSON, 46, WHO NEARLY LOST BOTH DAUGHTERS TO SEPTIC SHOCK AFTER THEY DEVELOPED INFECTIONS FROM TAMPONS) A mum has told how BOTH her daughters were almost killed within days of each other - when they both ended up in intensive care with septic shock infections after using 'super plus' tampons. Javon Johnson says her daughter Devine Johnson, 21, spent a week in intensive care after falling ill last year [May 26] - before learning she had developed sepsis from toxic shock syndrome (TSS) caused by a tampon. The 46-year-old feared she was going to lose her second-eldest daughter as she says her organs were at risk of shutting down. DISCLAIMER: While Kennedy News and Media uses its best endeavours to establish the copyright and authenticity of all pictures supplied, it accepts no liability for any damage, loss or legal action caused by the use of images supplied and the publication of images is solely at your discretion. SEE KENNEDY NEWS COPY - 0161 697 4266
Javon Johnson was terrified her girls wouldn’t make it (Picture: Kennedy News and Media)

‘It was more to do with the chemicals than the length of time they had them in for. They both didn’t sleep with them in.’

Now, Javon says the girls are still on the road to recovery.

Javon said: ‘The recovery was slow as they were very weak and it took a lot out of them.

‘Their stamina was slower. It has now been about a year and they’ve gotten better, but initially they had to do things very slowly.’

‘They don’t use tampons anymore. The family doctor and the doctor in Florida said they can’t use them.

What is Toxic Shock Syndrome (TSS)?

TSS (Toxic Shock Syndrome) is very rare condition caused by toxins getting into the blood stream and releasing dangerous toxins. It can affect anyone of any age but is most frequently associated with tampon use in young women. It can be fatal but it caught early it is treatable with antibiotics.

The causes of TSS

TSS is caused by bacteria called Staphylococcus. It usually lives harmlessly on the surface of the skin and but if it gets into the blood stream it can release toxins that can disturb the function of vital organs.

How to prevent TSS

According to the NHS:
– choose a tampon with the lowest absorbency suitable for your menstrual flow
– swap tampons for a sanitary towel or panty liner during your period
– wash your hands before and after inserting a tampon
– change tampons regularly never insert more than one tampon at a time
– insert a new tampon first thing before going to bed and change it first thing in the morning

‘They’re not sure why but they don’t think they can handle the potency of the tampons. He reckons they never will.’

Javon is now calling on other mothers and girls to pay attention to the different sizes of tampons, advising those with light cycles not to use the super plus variety of the sanitary product.

‘I wish people would pay attention to the different kinds of tampons. There are regular and super and super plus, but if you don’t really need the super plus, don’t use them.

‘We were told by the infection control doctor in Florida that if you have light cycles you don’t need a super plus.

‘I would just not recommend tampons at all at this point.’

Now, the family are trying to put the ordeal behind them. Javon said: ‘My husband and I are grateful both of them survived it.’

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

MORE : Mum gives birth in coma after rare ‘brain on fire’ disease left her with an American accent

MORE : Young dancer who thought she had the flu put on ventilator and loses her memory

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‘I wanted to rip my skin off after my shingles took over my body’ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/15/i-wanted-rip-skin-off-shingles-rash-started-bubbling-19820885/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/15/i-wanted-rip-skin-off-shingles-rash-started-bubbling-19820885/#respond Wed, 15 Nov 2023 06:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19820885
a photo of the shingles rash on Chanelle's skin
Chanelle Sadie Paul, 34, says shingles has changed her life (Picture: Chanelle Sadie Paul)

Chanelle Sadie Paul remembers the King’s Coronation in great detail – but not because of the royal family. Instead, it was the weekend her life, and her body, changed forever.

The 34-year-old was visiting family in Northamptonshire for the Bank Holiday when she noticed a small red mark on her armpit. Not thinking anything of it, she went about the rest of the day with her family.

But later in the evening, she saw the mark had started to bubble and puss. A couple of hours later, she checked it again and noticed more random red dots had started to spread around her back.

‘It was spreading like wildfire,’ recalls Chanelle, ‘it was just getting redder and redder. It was such a surreal experience – every time I looked at my body, it just kept going.’

The next morning the rash had spread to Chanelle’s chest.

‘I think by Sunday it had started to spread – and was bubbling and getting thicker. And by this point it was getting tender to touch,’ she tells Metro.

After Googling her symptoms, Chanelle realised she might be experiencing shingles – an infection that causes a severe, painful rash.

Once she returned home to London on the Bank Holiday Monday, a trip to A&E confirmed this diagnosis.

chanelle's skin
It started with a small patch and grew much bigger (Picture: Chanelle Sadie Paul)
The shingles rash spreading across Chanelle's back
The shingles rash quick bubbled across Chanelle’s back (Picture: Chanelle Sadie Paul)

The 34-year-old was prescribed antivirals as well as pain medication and sent home, but this wasn’t the end of the story for Chanelle.

For the three weeks that followed, she was left with an oozing rash and constant tingling sensation covering her armpit, back and chest.

‘It wasn’t a stinging pain, but it was just so much discomfort and it was almost like an out of body sensation,’ she recalls.

‘I just wanted to rip my skin off and start again. I think my main concerns were: when will it stop and how far will it go?

‘By the end I think it was about a good 2-3 week process from it starting, to it finally scabbing over. I remember when I got to the end of it, I just wanted to peel it off and go back to a smooth surface.’

The shingles rash, and subsequent scarring, has also had a huge impact on Chanelle’s mental health and body image. She said it also presented issues, due her work as an artist in TV and film.

‘I cried every day. I think I was fortunate in the sense that it was mostly at the back of my body,’ she added.

‘But, I just remember every day looking in the mirror and bursting out crying. I think it was obviously partly the sight of it, and partly how it felt.

‘I also knew with my skin type, I’d scar easily anyway.’

chanelle's skin
Scarring left by the shingles infection (Picture: Chanelle Sadie Paul)
Chanelle
Chanelle says it was a traumatic experience that’s ‘changed her’ (Picture: Chanelle Sadie Paul)

At first Chanelle was scared to show her scars at work, so she took outfits for wardrobe departments that covered her skin.

But as the months have passed, Chanelle says she’s started to accept her scars as well as the changes to her body – and is now finally comfortable sharing her story.

Chanelle continues: ‘Obviously, if I could turn back time and never got shingles, that would be 100% a choice that I would make. But it’s definitely changed me – it’s shaped me.

‘I wish the marks weren’t there – but I still, I’ll leave the house now and I’ll show them off.’

What is shingles?

Shingles is an infection that causes a painful rash. The NHS says you should seek advice from 111 as soon as possible if you think you have it.

The first signs of shingles can be:

  • a tingling or painful feeling in an area of skin
  • a headache or feeling generally unwell
  • A rash will appear a few days later.

If you have shingles, you should try to avoid:

Try to avoid:

  • Pregnant people who have not had chickenpox before
  • People with a weakened immune system – like someone having chemotherapy
  • Babies less than 1 month old – unless you gave birth to them, as your baby should be protected from the virus by your immune system.

Source: NHS

As well as the scarring, Chanelle has been left with nerve damage and sensitivity in the areas that were affected.

Now, she’s determined to share her story and spread awareness about how life-changing shingles can be – both physically and mentally.

‘It was traumatic,’ adds Chanelle, ‘but I’m glad I’m coming out the other end.’

chanelle's skin
‘It definitely could have broken me, but it hasn’t’ (Picture: Chanelle Sadie Paul)
chanelle's skin
Months later, her scarring has faded but is still visible (Picture: Chanelle Sadie Paul)

Chanelle says that when she informed her local GP of her shingles outbreak, she recalls the doctor asking her if she was in any pain from the nerve damage – but not anything else.

She was also keen to get a shingles vaccine after her traumatic experience, but was told she wasn’t eligible.

‘It was a bit like, unless you’re in pain, deal with it,’ Chanelle recalls.

‘My doctor literally came back and said “oh, you’re not in the age category for the vaccine.”‘

She also asked about products to help with scarring, but felt like her GP didn’t offer any advice on the topic.

With the shingles vaccine now available to anyone aged 65 or over, Chanelle feels more needs to be done to spread awareness of how life-changing shingles can be as an adult.

Especially as, even privately, the vaccine is only available to those 50 or over.

‘I really don’t want to go through this again,’ she added.

‘I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.’

chanelle's skin now
Chanelle is left with scarring and nerve damage after her shingles rash (Picture: Chanelle Sadie Paul)

According to the NHS, in some cases, the illness can cause blindness, hearing loss and nerve pain – and can be fatal to those most vulnerable.

Chanelle adds: ‘There isn’t much awareness on it and the impact of how severe it really is. But it has given me a new outlook of life and how I do things going forward – that’s my silver lining.

‘It gave me strength and I have gratitude. I try to take time to try and be calmer about situations and things now.

‘It definitely could have broken me, but it hasn’t.’

For support on shingles, get in touch with the Shingles Support Socieity.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

MORE : New shingles vaccine rules spark confusion – how to know if you’re eligible

MORE : I did a naked photoshoot at 46 and it cured my low self-esteem

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This 10-minute home workout is better for you than an hour of walking https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/15/equipment-free-home-workout-boosts-health-10-minutes-19817902/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/15/equipment-free-home-workout-boosts-health-10-minutes-19817902/#respond Wed, 15 Nov 2023 05:00:00 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19817902
Woman demonstrating a stretch at home before completing a 10-minute home workout
A 10-minute burst of regular cardio is enough to make a difference (Picture: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

No matter how much we loath to admit it, we all know that cardiovascular exercise is good for us.

It boosts heart health, lowers blood pressure, aids better lung capacity, weight management and mental health, but let’s face it, not all of us have the time – or the inclination – to commit to a 30-minute run or an hour-long walk around the countryside. 

So, what if we told you that you could get all those benefits and more in just 10 minutes — no fancy equipment needed?

What is High Intensity Interval Training?

High Intensity Interval Training (HIIT) is all about working as hard as you can for a short period of time before taking a short rest and doing it all over again. 

As Steve Doidge-Harrison, personal trainer and cofounder of Bio Skin & Wellness, tells Metro.co.uk: ‘Simply put, you do a series of exercises, at a very high intensity, interspersed with short recovery intervals.

‘The exercises can consist of anything from cardio, body-weight or weighted movements. The ‘work’ (exercise) and ‘rest’ (recovery) periods can vary from 10 seconds to over a minute.

‘HIIT could be considered the best “bang-for-your-buck” type of training there is.’

The main advantage to HITT over LISS (low-intensity steady-state cardio), says Steve, ‘is that you are getting fitter as well as healthier’.

‘Regular walking will improve your general state of physical and mental wellbeing but, you’re unlikely to get fitter,’ he adds.

‘HIIT will also improve various aspects of fitness, your strength, and bone density, for example. There is even evidence that HIIT training can enhance cognition and memory! With that said, the key to any health intervention is consistency. Unless you can stick to something long-term, it won’t do much good.’

The pros and cons of HIIT

The benefits of HIIT are pretty decent: it’s time-efficient, you get results fast and you feel amazing afterwards.

But before you get too excited, it’s important to recognise that while HIIT is great, it isn’t the be all and end all. 

As Steve explains, you can only really do HIIT a couple of times a week – because of how intense it is — and it should be coupled with other forms of exercise, like low intensity steady state cardio (LISS), like running or walking to see long-term results. 

Not to mention, training HIIT all the time may lead to burn out and your motivation may dwindle if you’re not working towards a long term goal, like running a 5K, for example. 

Try this 10-minute at home workout to boost heart health and happy hormones

All that being said, if you’re time poor and looking for a way to fit exercise into your routine, Steve’s HIIT workout could be exactly what you’re looking for.

All you need to do is set your timer for as long as you’ve got (10 to 20 minutes is optimal – you shouldn’t be able to do a HIIT workout for longer than that) and repeat the circuit as many times as you can in the allotted time. 

Warm up

Spend three minutes warming up with gentle cardio such as jogging on the spot or skipping.

Be sure to start slow and build intensity over the three minutes. 

Squats – 20 reps

Woman performing squat
Keep your weight back as if you’re sitting down (Picture: Getty Images/Westend61)
  • Perform 20 squats, keeping your heels down and your chest up – get as low as you can.
  • You can do them without weights.
  • Take a 20 to 30 second rest.

Press ups – 15 to 20 reps 

Front view of mid adult man doing clapping push-ups at home.
Drop to your knees to make the exercise more manageable (Picture: Getty Images)
  • Perform 15 to 20 press ups (or as many as you can).
  • Keep your core bottom squeezed and your shoulders down, and make sure you have good form for every rep.
  • You can perform press ups from your knees if necessary.
  • Take a 20 to 30 second rest.

Reverse lunges – 15 to 20 reps each side

woman doing lunge
Be sure to drive through your heels (Picture: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
  • Take a long stride back, slowly lower your back knee towards the ground, keep your hips forward and your chest up. 
  • Drive through your front heel to step back to the start. 
  • Repeat with the other leg.
  • Take a 20 to 30 second rest.

Mountain climbers – 15 to 20 reps each side

Active woman practicing mountain climb in gym
Keep your core engaged (Picture: Getty Images/Westend61)
  • Start in a press up position and draw one knee under your chest, keep your hips steady and body still. 
  • Step back and draw the other knee. 
  • Alternate legs.
  • Take a 45 to 60 second rest.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

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Like Celine Dion, my life has been shattered by Stiff Person Syndrome https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/14/woman-shares-like-live-stiff-person-syndrome-sps-19820404/ https://metro.co.uk/2023/11/14/woman-shares-like-live-stiff-person-syndrome-sps-19820404/#respond Tue, 14 Nov 2023 12:13:14 +0000 https://metro.co.uk/?p=19820404
Picture of Jomana
Jomana is raising awareness of the condition (Picture: Cover Images)

In December of last year, global superstar Celine Dion, 55, was diagnosed with Stiff Person Syndrome (SPS), a condition marked by severe spasms that can even lead to bone fractures. 

Because of her condition, the singer has been forced to step away from performing and the public eye. Her sister and spokesperson in recent months, Claudette Dion, told Hello! magazine in August that ‘it’s an illness we know so little about’ and that Celine is struggling to find relief from the pain.

And now, a Florida woman has opened up about her life with SPS and provided the public with a first person account of the life she, Celine and others with the condition are living. 

Jomana Houssari, 31, is an aspiring police officer from Bradenton and was pursuing a degree in criminal justice when she was diagnosed with SPS.

‘I’ve had health challenges since I was little,’ Jomana explained. ‘I was born prematurely, weighing just 2 lbs 9 oz (1.1kg), which led to hernia surgery right away. During my teenage years, I dealt with autoimmune and neurological conditions.

‘Then, in 2015, a major car accident turned my life upside down. I was hit by a truck going at least 60mph, which sent me into oncoming traffic, and then another vehicle hit me at full speed. I couldn’t move at all and was rushed to the hospital. I had to wear a neck brace for over a month and undergo more than 20 surgeries.’

Three years on from the accident, Jomana relocated to a different state. Sadly, just four months into her new living arrangement, she experienced what she described as ‘a major attack’. 

Picture of Jomana
Jomana has suffered with health issues since she was a child (Picture: @jomana_amira_/Cover Images)

‘All of a sudden, I couldn’t move my legs. A few minutes later, I regained function but kept experiencing leg spasms,’ Jomana recalled. ‘Initially, I received a misdiagnosis from my neurologist, who believed it to be Guillain-Barre syndrome.

‘However, it became evident that this wasn’t the correct diagnosis, so I took matters into my own hands and started doing my own research.’ 

As she scrolled through online articles, Jomana stumbled upon information about Stiff Person Syndrome (SPS). This exceptionally rare and incurable condition affects only one in a million individuals. 

Picture of Jomana in hospital
The condition calls intense spasms (Picture: @jomana_amira_/Cover Images)

‘When I discussed the similarities between my symptoms and those of SPS with my neurologist, he admitted that he had never encountered the condition before,’ Jomana said.

Nonetheless, he tested me. It was a month-long wait for the results, but eventually, it was confirmed that I indeed had SPS.’ 

SPS unleashes violent muscle spasms in the patient and it was a ‘relief’ for Jomana to finally get a diagnosis. ‘But thinking about the future is pretty scary,’ Jomana shared. ‘Right now, my symptoms include muscle spasms all over my body. When these episodes hit, I become a human statue, feeling stiffness in my chest, face, arms, legs, and back.

‘On top of that, I deal with slurred speech, memory problems, random bouts of laughter followed by fainting, overall weakness, tingling sensations in my head and body, and insomnia.’ 

Picture of Jomana
She says it’s difficult to live a normal life (Picture: @jomana_amira_/Cover Images)

These challenges have forced Jomana to put her studies on hold and have robbed her of what most would consider a ‘normal’ life. The spasms she experiences now are exceptionally severe and, at times, can even lead to broken bones.

Managing her condition requires a rigorous routine of infusions every three weeks, twice daily doses of baclofen to alleviate muscle spasms, potassium pills, thyroid medication, and essential vitamins.

‘I face challenges with almost every aspect of my life,’ she admitted. ‘However, I’m determined not to give up.’ 

Jomana in hospital
Doctors have indicated her condition was deteriorate (Picture: @jomana_amira_/Cover Images)

Despite the hardship, Jomanan tries to maintain a positive outlook and focuses on what she can achieve rather than dwelling on the limitation. . 

‘Every small step forward fills me with an incredible sense of achievement,’ she shared. ‘I’ve accomplished things I never thought possible when I first became disabled. I cherish every moment, whether sitting by the pool, enjoying scary movies on Netflix, or taking a walk along the beach on those days when I have the strength, collecting shells as I go.’

Despite the grim prognosis from her doctors, who have indicated that her condition will deteriorate over time, Jomana remains resolute. ‘I’ve been told that my condition will worsen, and my prognosis includes premature death,’ she revealed. 

‘While it’s challenging to predict when this might happen, it usually results from complications like blood clots, infections, bed sores, or respiratory issues. I dread the day when I’ll be confined to a wheelchair.

‘Until then, I’m determined to make the most of the time I have left and raise awareness about SPS by sharing my story.’

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

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